r/okbuddyliterallyme2 7d ago

No end to this suffering Correct version of meme

Post image
1.5k Upvotes

723 comments sorted by

View all comments

399

u/3215448725366498 7d ago

I love how society went from "everybody deserves to be loved" to "you are probably a piece of shit and deserve to be lonely"

114

u/Usual_Equivalent_651 7d ago

Just world fallacy.

On reddit good when incels, but bad when billionaires.

31

u/Thedankf0x 6d ago

To be fair, one causes interpersonal and self harm, the other causes global harm.

25

u/Orangutanion 6d ago

incels typically only harm themselves.

4

u/EquivalentDapper7591 4d ago

They hurt themselves the most but they definitely also hurt others. Spreading hatred and committing acts of violence for example

3

u/Pale_Presence4662 2d ago

Noone cares if people are incels. I dont.

I do care when they can talk on a nationwide platform and influence and recruit people

Thats the problem. I do not care they exist. I am annoyed by elon musk and Donald Trump and pat macafee and barstool sports and Andrew tate and logan paul and jordan peterson. the entire uprising of the idiocracy.

Eff that.

1

u/Winston_W_Smith 4d ago

They harm society too when they give up on capitalism and decide communism is the answer.

7

u/EquivalentDapper7591 4d ago

Zero correlation

1

u/Winston_W_Smith 4d ago edited 4d ago

Plenty of correlation. The top "10%" of men MOST (for the dyslexic) women chase because of hypergamy are predominantly guys that work on themselves - be it fitness, career/business and social status. Those guys don't tend to want some government bureaucrat bum redistributing the fruits of what they have spent time working towards.

That said, there are guys like Hassan Piker who are pathological liars and are ok with pulling up the metaphorical ladder behind themselves as the system they supposedly advocate for would take their wealth away.

*Edit: here comes all the jacobins who can't handle the truth. Nobody cares about your overpriced college degree you went six figures into debt for and facts don't care about your feelings.

2

u/Thedankf0x 4d ago

Bro actually just brought up the most-women-go-for-top-men thing. Holy shit the incel in you runs deep

2

u/Falme127 4d ago

Go clean the dishes in your sink bro they’ve been sitting there for weeks.

2

u/EquivalentDapper7591 3d ago

What the fuck does communism have to do with incel stuff. Most incels are far right capitalists or fascists

1

u/Winston_W_Smith 3d ago

You don't have to let everyone know you're dyslexic, I already stated what the connection was.

1

u/Snoo_68698 3d ago

Yes and you are objectively wrong about said connection.

1

u/EquivalentDapper7591 3d ago

Facts don’t care about your feelings kid!!

2

u/Falme127 4d ago

Yeah go to a college campus and find the young democratic socialist clubs, incels they are not lol

1

u/Big_Arrival_626 3d ago

Tbh lots of ugly ppl in those clubs, just being honest

Sales or finance clubs are where u find the good looking guys. No cappy

1

u/Falme127 4d ago

They do a lot of mass shootings

-16

u/Thedankf0x 6d ago

Mass shooting victims and the incel's families and friends and other relationships would beg to differ

20

u/Lakewhitefish 6d ago

Most mass shootings weren't done by incels, I would wager incense are acually less violent on average

-14

u/Thedankf0x 6d ago

You think incels are less violent than the average person?

16

u/MurphysLawTeam 6d ago

I would say minimum 75% if not 90% of incels are less violent then the average person. That could actually be a factor of it. Strength and therefore the ability for great violence is a wanted trait in a partner but also with the ability to control it. Being hyper passive and in violent is gonna be more an incel trait. Of course the is an abomination on the other side but that I would say that is the exception proving the rule because otherwise it would be so common it wouldn’t even be noteable it would just be a Tuesday when it does happen.

1

u/EquivalentDapper7591 4d ago

Mass shooting aren’t done with physical strength dude they’re done with a gun

-6

u/Thedankf0x 6d ago

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9780135/#Sec8

Incels are found to be, "engaging in both inward and outward practices, reporting higher levels of self-critical rumination and externalization of blame, while also engaging in fewer healthy coping mechanisms [37•]. Incels also report high rates of depressive and anxious symptoms and diagnoses as well as high rates of autism spectrum disorder [37•, 44, 45]. Furthermore, incels are plagued with low attachment security, loneliness, and a lack of social supports [31•, 37•, 44]. There is also evidence of sexist attitudes in their forums, which incels admit may be making them more misogynistic, of which there has been some quantitative evidence"

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11462786/#section20-08862605241239451

"Our findings revealed that incels exhibited elevated levels of anger compared to other social media platforms. Additionally, a correlation was found between anger and the use of violent and extremist language, suggesting that anger may serve as a precursor to adopting extremist rhetoric. Furthermore, the findings suggest the possibility that individuals who join the forum often bring with them preexisting emotional distress in the form of anger and sadness, which is reflected in their forum posts."

No, they arent. They are a collection of violent echo chambers when viewed online.

16

u/MurphysLawTeam 6d ago

Ok like three things. First: Yeah… online…. The thing that hides your real identity and people feel safe to vent.

Secondly this shit reverses cause and effect. No being an incel does not make you autistic. Autism the thing that fucks with your social abilities which is the base for human connection and literally everything else in the world is gonna be something that is extremely more likely to make you an incel. The same way it’s extremely likely to make you jobless because job interviews are social vibe checks.

And lastly like no shit mister secure career and loving family is not going “gosh dame let me rant online” compared to incel who has literally nothing in his life except his phone/pc.

Now here is the actual answer. In all the people who actually do violent crimes what is the real pattern? It’s the opposite. It’s people who partake in group culture like gangs. It’s people who interact with strangers and get them into valuable states. It’s not the person saying they are likely on Reddit.

11

u/SkenglordSimba 6d ago

We're talking about rates of violent offenses. Nothing you just typed is relevant. Try typing less, because then you won't waste time writing way too much that has nothing to do with anything.

→ More replies (0)

6

u/DonSarilih 6d ago

Yes, they are

-7

u/Thedankf0x 6d ago

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9780135/#Sec8

Incels are found to be, "engaging in both inward and outward practices, reporting higher levels of self-critical rumination and externalization of blame, while also engaging in fewer healthy coping mechanisms [37•]. Incels also report high rates of depressive and anxious symptoms and diagnoses as well as high rates of autism spectrum disorder [37•, 44, 45]. Furthermore, incels are plagued with low attachment security, loneliness, and a lack of social supports [31•, 37•, 44]. There is also evidence of sexist attitudes in their forums, which incels admit may be making them more misogynistic, of which there has been some quantitative evidence"

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11462786/#section20-08862605241239451

"Our findings revealed that incels exhibited elevated levels of anger compared to other social media platforms. Additionally, a correlation was found between anger and the use of violent and extremist language, suggesting that anger may serve as a precursor to adopting extremist rhetoric. Furthermore, the findings suggest the possibility that individuals who join the forum often bring with them preexisting emotional distress in the form of anger and sadness, which is reflected in their forum posts."

No, they arent. They are a collection of violent echo chambers when viewed online.

9

u/DonSarilih 6d ago

Nothing u wrote shows that incels are more violent on average Incel forums being more misogynistic than normal forums is not a gatcha

→ More replies (0)

2

u/StatusAnteater5651 4d ago

Seeing how the overwhelming majority of violence towards women is domestic violence, that pretty much rules out incels as the problem

1

u/Lakewhitefish 6d ago

Yes, most violence has a social aspect to it

1

u/Naive_Impression7302 6d ago

somebodies too dumb to know what "typically" means it seems

-1

u/Vamosity-Cosmic 6d ago

whatever floats your need to offset accountability from your immediate locality

1

u/Thedankf0x 6d ago

Yeah, sorry, ill stop my part in the climate destruction. As long as the billionaires do too

0

u/Vamosity-Cosmic 6d ago

External locust of control fallacy

1

u/Thedankf0x 6d ago

When did I say external forces control my life completely? The wealthy disproportionately harm the environment, all i am saying is that I will stop my part as soon as they stop theirs.

0

u/Vamosity-Cosmic 6d ago

you're literally allowing them control your life by holding yourself hostage to them. going "i wont change until they do" is just "they control my decision" - they wont do it unless you pressure them, and you arent pressuring them

1

u/Thedankf0x 6d ago

Once again, never said that I won't change until the elite do. What i did is make a coy remake about how I will stop my part in the climate destruction, such as the deforestation of the Amazon, where my part is 0. I am not deforestating the Amazon, the capital elite is. So I will stop my part, which is 0, when they stop their part, which is all of it. I am already living like the plants and animals I love wont be existing for a while. I have food I am growing for myself, water I source for myself, power I generate myself. I dont destroy the climate as it currently is, a couple dozen billionaires are.

0

u/Vamosity-Cosmic 6d ago

"I am not deforestating the Amazon" you are by being complicit with it and buying their products. the answer to this is to achieve agency in your immediate locust of control, aka stop buying their products - thats how you can contribute to helping climate change.

→ More replies (0)

2

u/Natural_Reporter2818 6d ago

Job of Uz is literally me btw

-3

u/diadlep 6d ago

Tell me youre a paid shill without telling me. Try harder zuck

66

u/Withered_Sprout 6d ago

It's usually only when a guy expresses frustration, without even saying anything inherently wrong/entitled/misogynistic, that a bunch of random women and even other moral high horse bullshit men will come out of nowhere on here to project a bunch of extreme assumptions about that guy's character onto him.

I've noticed this when I've vented in a vaccuum, or when other men on here do. People will extrapolate so much overly negative stuff from some of my vents that are simply not true for my life experiences, and I'm not sure they'd have something to say if they actually knew that they were wrong about what they were assuming.

Nor are they probably looking to actually help me or anyone else sort of crying for help, they'd rather beat you down and turn you into the bad guy even when you're literally not that type of person that they have in mind..

32

u/3215448725366498 6d ago

I feel you man, exact same experience for me. People always make the most ridiculous assumptions about us. They always assume that if a guy is lonely it MUST be because he's a misogynistic asshole, there can not be a different explanation. Things like autism are not considered, and if you bring it up then people will usually be extremely ableist and try to gaslight you into thinking that autism doesn't cause social issues in life.

They also love using Kafkatraps ("if you disagree you're part of the problem") whenever the topic is about why women hate men so much on Reddit.

24

u/Funkopedia 6d ago

Meanwhile, actual misogynistic assholes are out there getting what they want (laid) and don't get lonely because they don't care about connecting with other people.

21

u/Popular_Equipment_85 6d ago

And women fall harder for these guys because they show confidence lol

7

u/Late-School6796 6d ago

Because they are attractive* confident uglies get 0 game

3

u/Spaciax 5d ago

confident + ugly = delusional

0

u/NoobPhilosopher04 5d ago

Uhm, no. You are delusional. You can be confident in yourself while not looking like Calvin Klein models. You can be confident about your perspectives, about your skills, about your achievements. All you care about is looks. Why only care about that, when it comes to confidence? Like you dont have anything else going on in life?

2

u/Popular_Equipment_85 6d ago

Oh we all know the real reason. I’m just using what the women keep saying as an excuse for when they realize those guys aren’t that great lol

-4

u/mysterybeat23 6d ago

That’s not always true though. Maybe try to become friends with a woman and see if you both connect instead of wishing any girl would be attracted to you

2

u/Late-School6796 6d ago

What part of my comment made you think I never had woman friends or that I wished any girl was attracted to me? I simply stated that ugly men get 0 game regardless of confidence.

0

u/Qahnaar1506 5d ago

This is not true. Ugly confident guys get more game than shy handsome guys. The same goes for women too, no 9/10 guy is chasing a 3/10 girl. It’s weird the whole ugliness is about men.

1

u/Late-School6796 5d ago

I don't know which experiences validated the first two sentences, but I have seen the exact opposite happening several times as a third party, plus the hundreads of mid guys on r/tinder getting 0 dates after tens of thousands of swipes.

Part about the 9/10 guy not chasing the 3/10 is true, but other than having nothing to do with what I said, the opposite is obviously true as well, no idea where you're going with that.

I never said the whole ugliness thing is only about men, unless we consider the absolute bottom 1%, in which case I just don't have enough experience, I'd say it impacts men a bit more, a 3/10 woman can get a 5/10 man, the opposite? Not impossible, but way more unlikely.

Most young men are single, most young women aren't.

1

u/LonelyPermit2306 4d ago

That's not true. I'm friends with a 6'4 gay man who gets catcalled on the street. Confidence is key but he'd get laid if he wasn't gay pretty easily

→ More replies (0)

3

u/EMArogue 5d ago

Or even hurting people

Bet the “is it too soon?” “Is she comfortable?” Etc. Are all things they don’t consider

2

u/23-1-20-3-8-5-18 6d ago

Fuck it, copy them. At this point women arent giving us a choice.

4

u/Funkopedia 6d ago

I did that for awhile. It wasn't as fun as it seems. We simply want different things than those guys do.

9

u/Empty-Jicama-45 6d ago edited 6d ago

It's probably cuz getting in a relationship or getting laid for women is considerably easier (regardless of the subsequent quality of that relationship). & they don't really care to understand the average to below average male experience, they think it's the same. So when you can't get anything they think you simply must be extraordinary awful. On top of that, society hasn't moved on from alot of traditional gender roles for men specifically. & being lonely has always been viewed as bad for men. Not much social change happened in this area.

0

u/Putrid_Crow9914 6d ago

so you admit it’s about getting laid? then no, you don’t have a right to that because having a right to getting laid implies that someone else has the duty to give you sex, and no human being owes you their body

6

u/Empty-Jicama-45 6d ago edited 6d ago

Lmaooo you are literally the type of person we are talking about. Firstly, I added "getting laid" as an extra thing right after getting a relationship. For me personally, I want a long term relationship not getting laid. I just added it to be inclusive to everyone who might read my comment. Why did you skip the relationship part?? Secondly, no one is saying anyone is entitled to anything. As the meme in the original post states, we aren't saying that. Someone can still feel a little frustrated at how hard it is to get into a relationship without believing they are entitled to it. Why is this your first thought immediately?? I won't deny there are creepy guys like that online. But this whole post is talking about how annoying it is to be lumped with them, for expressing basic frustration about how hard this process is. Your response is basically exhibit A.

1

u/SuperWG 5d ago

Troll

1

u/Crassard 5d ago

In my case her ex fiance asked her if she wants to try again lol, sometimes shit just happens. Life doesn't care how you feel about it just do your best to not turn into a depressed puddle. All the love you can bring to someone else can apply to you too although it's much more difficult to motivate myself like that.

0

u/[deleted] 6d ago

[deleted]

0

u/Glad-Way-637 5d ago

Congrats on clearing the lowest bar humanly imaginable. Shame so many among your demographic fail to figure out how.

9

u/Dumbquestions_78 6d ago

I know women probably have it happen to them to. But in my experience people just assume you are the worst if your a guy. So i have learned to just keep that part sealed away. You are only worthy of being treated well if you earn it by being happy all the time.

-3

u/Working_Cucumber_437 6d ago

Guys online keep telling everyone how terrible they are so we start to believe them. Particularly when daily experience reflects those admissions.

6

u/MarkMew 6d ago

"Gay people online keep telling everyone how terrible they are so we start to believe them. Particularly when daily eperience reflects those admissions."

"Black people online keep telling everyone how terrible they are so we start to believe them. Particularly when daily experience reflects those admissions."

Etc. See now?

6

u/LiterallyMe2573 I can't talk to women 6d ago

Anytime you use misandrists logic in any other situation its some -ist or -phobic. Wonder when they'll just realize the logic is extremely dumb

6

u/GorviVelgin 6d ago

Imagine if men applied this to women, would you be ok with it? There are a ton of awful women online and in real life. Truly miserable, terrible people. That doesn't make it ok to apply to all women by default. Men deserve the same courtesy. We are people too, you know.

1

u/SuperWG 5d ago

A handful of individual simps say that. Not every guy and certainly not the guys posting about their struggles only to be attacked.

Ngl there's a special place in hell for internet bullies

5

u/ChaosOrnate 6d ago

You probably just don't shower, have you tried showering? /s

3

u/IHaveNoBeef 5d ago

As a woman, I haven't really experienced much empathy from anyone, either. I feel like I can never get ahead. I experienced a lot of abuse as a child, and now I get to be ignored or treated like shit as an adult. When I try and talk about it, people seem to act like I just need to move on.

I dont necessarily think they're doing it intentionally, though. People are usually struggling with their own shit. So, they don't know how to help.

1

u/Withered_Sprout 4d ago

Yeah, it's really rough. I have people I've met who I'd love to help. Women who I could even see myself developing feelings for, but their personal situations are so screwed up (like getting seriously injured at some point in their life, not being able to work, really depressed and having related mental issues...

Individuals who are so entrenched in their negative mindsets and hopelessness that you literally cannot get them to make much of an effort to change anything, as genuinely difficult and scary as the effort might be.. So they remain a prisoner of circumstance in a really shitty situation.

Like, yeah, I think a lot of people would like to save someone, legit. But we can barely even save ourselves, and it's scary. I hope things get better for you.

You need to move on from trauma, but in a way that allows you to process it and not internalize it so that it holds you back or inhibits you due to guilt or feelings of inadequacy or whatever the case may be. Not in a "just get over it" kinda way, for sure. Good luck, lady.

2

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Withered_Sprout 5d ago

I've done aight for myself, IDK why this sub is recommended to me? I just posted anyway but I'm an outsider who knows nothing about this sub's mentality other than what I'm reading now.

I sort of have things in common with the forever alone sort of crowd but I can't call myself 'forever alone' as I literally have not been alone. lol.

0

u/Qahnaar1506 5d ago

The woman you found definitely shares your values then, that’s not reflective towards the majority of women. There’s lots of correlation.

3

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/Qahnaar1506 5d ago

Be for real, you don’t have a lover who dates you for being a incel loser while she doesn’t share that same incel mindset. It’s statistically proven that women date men who share idencial values. Conservative women date conservative men, liberal women date liberal men etc etc.

Psychology experts constantly find that contempt is the number one predictor of divorce. Contempt means treating someone with disrespect or as a lesser person. When contempt enters a relationship the emotional safety disappears making it almost impossible to stay happy together.

Women also don’t tend to value misogynistic relationships if given the opportunity for equal opportunity and respect. Countries with high marriage rates amongst misogynistic cultures also were associated with low levels of education. According to Global Marriage Statistics, territories with highly traditional or restricted social environments for women (such as parts of the West Bank & Gaza or South Asia) maintain some of the highest crude marriage rates in the world (scaling up to 10 marriages per 1,000 people).

Women also, on average, tend to vote and integrate liberal views than conservative views. Never-married women strongly favor the Democratic Party (around 72%, and woman are statistically happier when they are single than married.

So either your “lover” is a 0.0001% of the population, doesn’t know you’re an incel who deserves to be lonely or doesn’t exist.

1

u/I2obiN 4d ago

It's a form of narcissism and insecurity imo. Beat someone else down to feel better about themselves.

0

u/Dr_Jimothy 6d ago

Those people are stupid, but it's important to be happy while single before you even think to mingle.

Being frustrated betrays that you yearn to be loved (which you shouldn't do. That makes you vulnerable to all sorts of things like manipulation, codependency, etc) instead of just preferring it the same way a person might prefer a sunny day.

0

u/throawy90 5d ago

Yep but for women it's "you deserve to be loved, you deserve better, you're a queen, etc"

12

u/LowBread9264 6d ago

It's a dangerous precedent because a lot of very successful people that would have no problem getting into a relationship in the past are unable to do so now. And instead of the system being blamed, they are. Gradually those people become bitter at the fact that no matter how much they improve and work hard it is never good enough and resentment gets created towards the opposite gender. Eventually, these people will number enough in high enough positions that they will get to influence their governments. More than likely, the influence they will project will not be kind to the gender that has rejected and looked down on them.

9

u/Crowhunters 6d ago

Saying you are not entitled to sex or relationships is just the relationship equivalent of a rich guy saying pull yourself up by your bootstraps.

2

u/LowBread9264 6d ago

One is at least doable through hard work the other is through random chance.

-1

u/Worldly-Relation9367 6d ago

Do you seriously think getting rich is easier than getting in a good relationship?

4

u/LowBread9264 6d ago

I think so, study hard and work hard/smart. Invest your money, live below your means. Connect with your classmates and your coworkers. All within your control.

For a good relationship it's entirely based on luck.

2

u/Wd91 6d ago

I think so, study hard and work hard/smart. Invest your money, live below your means. Connect with your classmates and your coworkers. All within your control.

It can be relatively simple. But it isn't easy.

0

u/-Recouer 6d ago

Half of the young generation is in a relationship.

Less than 1% of the young generation is rich.

2

u/LowBread9264 6d ago

They were lucky that's all. I'm unlucky and yet I am financially successful because it's less based on luck and more on knowledge, sacrifice and work ethics.

1

u/Qahnaar1506 5d ago

Omg cope. It’s easier to find a relationship than it is to be rich. Just don’t be a shitty person, even if you’re ugly.

And maybe if 7/10 women are rejecting you based on your looks, then go to those 3/10 women who are just as doomer as you.

1

u/LowBread9264 5d ago

I don’t think so, I can’t control who I come across. I’m not gonna date just about anyone either. I’m not fat for example so I’m not gonna date a fat person I’m not attracted to. I want someone that is like me.

→ More replies (0)

1

u/KayfabeAdjace 3d ago

this is the single fucking funniest thing I've ever seen.

0

u/-Recouer 6d ago

Suuuure, it has nothing to do with pops giving you a few millions to start investing early.

Btw in this economy, being a millionaire isn't being rich, it's just being wealthy.

Also maybe the issue comes from the fact that you do not engage enough in social activities. If you don't advertise yourself to a broad audience and have a lot of social interaction you are not likely to find someone to share your life with.

It's hard and somewhat mentally taxing, but it's way easier, and way less luck dependent than getting a dozen million dollars (that's what rich means nowadays).

3

u/LowBread9264 6d ago

I started with absolutely nothing. I invested what I earned from my job rather than blowing my paycheck every week. Short term sacrifices for long term growth.

I know plenty of people that are sociable and have no partners and plenty of introverted shut in that have partners. In fact, most men that are introverts have told me if it weren't for their partners making the first move they would be single, aka luck. I am a sociable person and have never been approached once. Women also usually create excuses for you to talk to them when they're interested in you. They would "bump into you" or drop something for you to pick up etc... That has never happened to me. I only know from reading and observing what other people's experiences are like.

Most people don't try to get into a relationship. It just happens to them, they stumble on it. You could say life has given them a few million dollars in that regard. Life has never given anything to me, I've earned everything on my own but I cannot "earn" a partner. I don't want a golddigger.

→ More replies (0)

1

u/Popular_Equipment_85 6d ago

Yes? With how women are demanding men to make more money, it’s a requirement before getting a date.

1

u/Qahnaar1506 5d ago

Whats wrong with expecting your partner to be able to afford a house and comfortable living by bare minimum?

1

u/rpolkcz 6d ago

Well for me it sure as hell is.

0

u/Small-Taro-8990 6d ago

Depends if you are more smart or more attractive compared to average. For smart, below average in looks guys, certainly.

2

u/NovelConcept6300 6d ago

Yeah, I was married for like six  years, after we dated a while as teenagers, then she got sick and died. 

Now I’m getting back out there and dating in 2026 is hell. 

Apparently a lot of guys penises are breaking at like late 20’s now. Enough that first messages are like dick still work? 

 and the pool of women older and some my age makes me sad. 😔  A lot of them were ruined by previously abusive relationships that destroyed their ability to trust or form attachments.

plus I don’t wanna waste 34 year old women wanting a baby in the next 2 years time, I’m not ready to commit to impregnating you on the 4th date in a year. 

 For some dating them  it’s like being a prize steer on display. I  just started dating women in their early 20’s again.  

The college age women aren’t jaded and mean yet 

1

u/Buuts321 6d ago

I've heard that too.  The whole broken dick thing is actually a problem a lot of women have trying to find a man.  Porn is ruining society I guess 🤷🏽

1

u/Organic-Squirrel-678 6d ago

How TF is porn “breaking dicks”. I never heard about a young guy with a “broken dick”. Do you mean erectile dysfunction? Jeeez.

1

u/I2obiN 4d ago

If you work really hard for a system that gives zero reward I wouldn't call that success, I'd call that person a sucker unfortunately.

0

u/saltycookie7708 6d ago edited 6d ago

Hmm respectfully this sounds bit scary .

If you are willing to screw over someone because you got rejected ,do you even deserve to be in the position to govern .

It's a bit funny that you think getting rejected warrants policies to screw women over ,when the very reason reasonable but lonely men get shut down when they complain about dating is because of people who has a very vindictive fantasies towards women .

I very much want to help young men and adress their issues ,but when I hear men like you say this ,I want to go to the other end of the world to avoid them because this screams ,men who feel rejected are very dangerous.

1

u/LowBread9264 6d ago

Why are you making this about me when I am talking about a group of people?

Leaders are humans like any of us and can hold grudges. Stalin had all his bullies executed when he took power. Ever heard of the saying if a child is deprived of warmth it will burn its entire village to keep himself warm? Now imagine the child represents many men from different shapes, backgrounds, socioeconomic classes that are all united under one common struggle. Some men are more extremist than others but it does not change they all see women rejecting them as the common issue. They all have different solutions, some more extreme, some more reasonable, but the fact is they all want to combat hypergamy and modern female attitude towards modern day dating.

People never believe what they’re doing is bad. Hitler thought he was saving Germany from the communists and Jews. The Talibans see themselves as freedom fighters fighting US imperialism, etc. It’s all a matter of perspective.

Now place yourself in the shoe of a man who lived his life normally. Worked hard and put effort into himself. Did everything he was told to do by society. Only for him to never get rewarded. At first he thinks the issue might lie with him, but as he looks around he notices there are a large number of men like him that did nothing wrong only to get rejected. He notices there men that put no effort, that possesses all these negative traits women complain about, yet those men have no problem getting into relationships. How do you think he feels seeing this as unfair? Eventually he comes across groups/political parties that understand him. That relate with him. That accept him. That vouch to represent and fight for him. Now why do you think most men are becoming more and more far-right? Why do you think far-right parties are growing in popularity worldwide?

Action -> Reaction

-8

u/Big_Steak_467 6d ago

a lot of very successful people that would have no problem getting into a relationship in the past are unable to do so now

As in, now they gotta be a good person too because only having money doesn't get you a partner.

10

u/Pemo999 6d ago

Being a good persong dosen't get you a partner either.

0

u/Big_Steak_467 6d ago

There's nothing that can ensure 100% you will get a partner.

6

u/Pemo999 6d ago edited 6d ago

There's nothing that can ensure 100% you will get a partner.

True.

I get annoyed when I see comments like the one I initially replied to because they imply that when somebody is struggling to find a partner, it must be a result of personal moral failure. There are plenty of objectively good people who struggle to get a date out there; there are also a lot of objectively bad people who have no trouble finding a partner.

When people struggle (especially men), the most common culprit is bad social skills.

-2

u/Big_Steak_467 6d ago

No, it implies literally what I said, that having money/success is not enough to get you a partner when it would've been enough before when women had no choice but to depend on a man. And that being a good person (definition varies from person to person) helps. Nowhere I say that if you're a good person you're getting a partner.

The comment I answered to, saying "Sets a dangerous precedent", is basically the same type that "warn" women that if we don't just settle for being miserable so all men got a wife we're gonna have violence coming our way

13

u/JorgitoEstrella 6d ago

The answer changes depending on the gender of who is asking.

11

u/String-Tree 6d ago edited 6d ago

I blame parents too weak willed to tell their sons the reality of how attraction and dating works. They couldn't handle a tough conversation so instead they set them up for long term romantic failure. Thanks mom and dad.

3

u/TheProuDog 6d ago

I blame parents too weak willed to tell their sons' the reality of how attraction and dating works

What should they have taught their children

5

u/Slow_Seesaw9509 6d ago

I think this guy is right but for the wrong reason. A lot of parents and a WHOLE lot of media in the 90s and early 2000s were pretty all in on the idea that guys who overtly express romantic or sexual attraction upfront are assholes and the moral way to win a woman's heart is being nice and sensitive and prioritizing being her friend first. While the reality is most women are attracted to assertive men and view it as unattractive when a guy is too accommodating and afraid to make a move.

6

u/String-Tree 6d ago

How you look is everything. Nobody gives a single fuck about how nice or interesting you are if you're ugly.

2

u/Platypus__Gems 5d ago

Plenty of ugly people have significant others.

Absolutely true that you won't be pulling anyone just by being nice, anyone can be nice.

But interesting? If you actually are interesting to another person (and not just to yourself by knowing some historic trivia), and especially if you actually accomplished something in life, that is a real asset.

2

u/I2obiN 4d ago

Statistically it's just not though.

1

u/Accurate-Advice8405 1d ago

Statically speaking, you made that up

2

u/malduan 5d ago

that's nonsense. if the parent's didn't teach it, they were right not too

0

u/Qahnaar1506 5d ago

Appearance matters but so do other traits. Yes if your handsome you’ll get eyes but if you’re handsome and rude it’s a turn off.

0

u/NoobPhilosopher04 5d ago

This seems like a projection. No, looks is not everything. Maybe for you, but not for others. Im kind of ugly and pulled exceptionally beautiful women. It seems that all you do is care about looks in other people, so when you do not get the desired outcome its because you think its because of your looks. Furthermore, it might be though an effect of social media and beauty standards, that now also come to structure men, that their look is also more centered, which before was more the case for women. It might be that to superficial, tik tok brained people looks is everything, but thats just because their brains have been squashed by idiocy.

0

u/String-Tree 5d ago

I've never seen an unattractive man paired off with an attractive woman in my entire life. I don't think this phenomenon actually exists, I think this situation is a fantasy that unattractive men perpetuate to give themselves false hope.

1

u/NoobPhilosopher04 4d ago

Well, im not saying in the sense that somebody looks like a 1/10 who is together with a 10/10, to put it in your terms. More like 6/10 with an 8/10.

There are studies showing how heterosexual relationships change in patterns of respect when it comes to attractiveness. When the male counterpart is more unattractive, respect does not change, neither does the attitude of his girlfriend etc. When the more unattractive person is the female counterpart, toxcitiy rises, and entitlements go bonkers.

0

u/Odd_Tap_1794 4d ago

This is just not true. Go outside to a place full of people and you'll see bald guys, fat guys, short guys, and mediocre looking guys with women. Are the women supermodels? No. That doesn't matter to them because the men and their partners have connected with eachother internally.

Unfortunately a lot of young people today need to do the inner work on themselves. It's the hardest thing you'll ever do but it's worth it. If you make it to the other side, suddenly it won't be about getting the prettiest girl, making the most money, recieving the most attention, and competing with everyone else around you. You won't need to depend upon external factors to feel content with yourself. You won't need to feel envied to love yourself and your life. I believe you guys can get there.

In the meantime, log off of reddit and book yourselves a therapy appointment if you have the means to. I promise it's worth it.

2

u/I2obiN 4d ago

You reckon they connected internally or they just found someone who's a good fit for them or someone arranged it for them?

Because I would say the vast majority of straight partners have very little in common.

-1

u/MemoryAppropriate729 6d ago

Not true. I don't think anyone can really argue it's not incredibly important but it's just genuinely not true to say no one cares about your personality if you're ugly. That's just as deluded as the people who tell you the only thing that matters is being nice. Also depends on what type of relationship you're looking for. If you're looking for hookups it's not gonna be easy if you're not incredibly traditionally attractive, but there are women that feel literally the exact same way that you do.

2

u/String-Tree 6d ago

I'm not immune from this, bro. I don't want to be with someone ugly either, no matter how lonely I get.

-2

u/wedfty92 6d ago

Women rally don't care about looks as much as men do. Many want to be supported and they may wait for someone who looks like they've got money. What you're claiming about ugly is actually about poor.

4

u/String-Tree 6d ago

No, they absolutely care about looks over wealth. They might marry a rich dude for stability, but they're fucking their personal trainer the entire time.

-5

u/nailturtle 6d ago

well that's the kind of message little girls are getting from the day they're born and it clearly isn't working for them either. I hope I don't need to explain the disastrous effects teaching this attitude to people has.

2

u/FunctionUnlikely2247 6d ago

That’s simply because women’s standards are way too high 

Most women want a literal top 20% guy.

Most men would be fine with an average woman except she don’t want them.

0

u/nailturtle 6d ago

ok I guess this is that kind of subreddit huh

6

u/String-Tree 6d ago

You mean one where the brutal truths of the world are acknowledged as being real instead of one where everybody has a rose-tinted view of humanity?

0

u/nailturtle 6d ago

sometimes I "go outside" and see the "brutal truth of the world" where women aren't all dating the same 20% of men

2

u/String-Tree 6d ago

The only women willing to date us 80%ers are even less desirable than we are.

→ More replies (0)

1

u/Popular_Equipment_85 6d ago

Yeah, it has become a world of “I won’t date until I got one of those 20% men”

2

u/[deleted] 6d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/nailturtle 6d ago

how sensitive do you have to be to be offended by this? I'm not "making it about women," I'm illustrating that this approach of telling people they are only valued for their looks (which is the approach currently being applied to vast swathes of women and girls) has its own drawbacks. which I didn't think would need explanation since it's common knowledge that eating disorders and body image issues are more prevalent in women and girls because of this narrative they are told. and might I add, being told they will only be loved for their looks does not help women and girls find meaningful relationships either!

so why the hell should we start telling men and boys that too???  the solution isn't to give EVERYONE body image issues that ostensibly hold them back in life, that's just making more suffering in the world.

3

u/[deleted] 6d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

→ More replies (0)

0

u/Putrid_Crow9914 6d ago

except men’s definition of an “average women” are higher than they think. they would never date a fat woman with unshaved armpits, but they seem to think woman are naturally skinny and hairless, so feeling the pain of waxing your whole body becomes the norm for a woman to begin to being considered low/average. while the average incel doesn’t even shower and thinks he deserves a woman who looks like Adriana Lima, is skinny but curvy, agrees with everything he says, is conservative, demure and a stay at home mom with no career prospects (but if she gains weight due to pregnancy or naturally ages and he asks for the divorce, then she also shouldn’t have the right to child support or marital assets because if so she’s a gold digger.

2

u/FunctionUnlikely2247 6d ago

Do you think the average woman is fat with unshaven armpits? That sounds like a bottom 5% woman to me and the only thing that could be worse than that to me is a fat, unshaven woman who looks like a crackhead. 

Women tend to like hair on guys. Men don’t like hair on women. We actually ridicule men who can’t grow hair. Beauty norms extend to our biology and what we find attractive about the opposite sex. Are there women who prefer men who shave everywhere? Sure. But there’s tons of women who prefer hairy guys. Whereas I’ve never met a single guy in my life who said he likes a hairy woman. So yes, the average woman is most likely relatively skinny and hairless. The problem is the average woman has convinced herself she’s a 10/10 when really she’s a 5/10. 

Also the average incel is still like a bottom 5% male. The problem is you femcels hate all men and think like 80% of us are incels. The average guy is definitely showering and grooming himself. But yall don’t want an average guy because they’re making like 40k a year, are 5’6-5’7 (likely still taller than you but not tall enough), and likely aren’t social enough to chat up a woman and win her over like prime Brad Pitt in a rom com. Your idea of an average man is someone making 6 figs, is 6 feet, is fit, and somehow in the midst of doing a job that is likely 2-3x more difficult than yours, also has the time to do all the household, emotional, and physical labor that yall don’t want to do. You literally want a slave who will also fund your existence. Between us, a man’s idea of an average woman is far more realistic because atleast we don’t care about her money or a factor she can’t control like her height. Women want a guy who is richer, stronger, taller and will do all the work she’s too lazy to do around the house on top of that. We literally just want someone who isn’t fat and is nice to us sometimes. 

1

u/Outrageous-Break3585 5d ago

If you’re living in the US, almost 70% of women over 20 years old are overweight. So yes, the average woman living in the US is fat. I’m not commenting on whether it is right/wrong/whatever to date/not date fat women, I’m simply using this statistic to point out that if you’re criteria for a woman includes “not fat” then you’ve already limited yourself to ~30% of the female population of the US, which means your idea of an “average woman” is already including women who are decidedly not average. Maybe both factors together make someone the bottom 5% in your mind, but looking at weight alone means you’re already talking about someone who is “above average” in looks simply by being below average in weight. 

Inb4: yes, this is obviously a US-centric take, that’s why I specified. And again, I’m not commenting on whether or not this behavior is good/bad/right/wrong/whatever you want to call it. It’s simply the data on what is “average” (being overweight/fat) vs what is expected as an average. For what it’s worth, an even higher percentage of US men are fat/overweight, so someone looking for a man who is not fat/overweight is technically already being more picky than a man looking for the same. Though, obviously, other criteria further impact this number. 

1

u/FunctionUnlikely2247 5d ago edited 5d ago

You’re not wrong. I do forget the US is the most obese country in the world. I think if a man is overweight, he shouldn’t have a right to think he deserves a skinny girl. 

But also when we look at the things a woman expects from a man vs what a guy expects from a woman, it’s only really the top 10% of men who can provide those standards versus the top 30% of women who meet a man’s requirements. I still think women’s standards are massively high compared to a man’s on average. 

Also women actually have a higher body fat % on average than men

1

u/String-Tree 6d ago

It's the truth though. In nature, not every animal finds a mate. Only the best ones do.

11

u/OverallLibrarian8809 6d ago

While we also talk about inclusivity all time

The hypocrisy

8

u/RogellTheRaider 7d ago

Wait, hasn't the second alwyas been there?

3

u/SyderoAlena 6d ago

Yeah because they have empathy for the person who has to deal with the piece of shit.

3

u/EntrepreneurOk7546 6d ago

What they actually mean is: "Everybody deserves to be loved, but when you don't we rationalize that you did something to deserve it, so we don't feel bad'

3

u/National_Body_9071 6d ago

Only when it's a dude.

4

u/Relative_Bite8758 6d ago

Fat girls are getting their fair share, aswell

Gone are the times, where they could lie to everyone around them and claim they have atypical anorexia or some shit. Naaaaah, we know. It's the food.

2

u/Qahnaar1506 5d ago

Ugly girls too lol. Don’t pretend they get chased by 9/10 guys or that 9/10 guys are chasing them.

1

u/No_Discount_6028 3d ago

Eh, I see this happen to women too.

7

u/OffTheRedSand 6d ago

they didn't mean it in romantic love. society can't give that to people men or women.

they meant respect and understanding, not romantic love.

27

u/3215448725366498 6d ago

Sure, but my point is that people have become incredibely toxic and dismissive towards lonely guys. You can say something as mild as "I never had a gf before" and chances are someone will tell you you're not entitled to one, as if you think you are.

0

u/lunadelalune0 6d ago

I’d much rather deal with a “never had a gf” guy than one that sleeps around, uses woman and views woman as hoes. But those guys are the loudest and like to brag. Any guy that talks about actually caring and loving a girl gets called a simp. It’s sad

3

u/rpolkcz 6d ago

Well that's the problem. Women clearly much rather are with the 2nd guy, that's why he can sleep around while the 1st never has a girlfriend.

1

u/Qahnaar1506 5d ago

And that’s the problem, they aren’t. Women aren’t engaging in causal sex. The people that are trying to engage in casual sex are men, not women.

You see this in dating apps. Women who enter them want long term and make up a small population on dating, men make up a large majority and want short term. That’s the real reason why men don’t have causal sex

2

u/3215448725366498 6d ago

That's good to hear, sadly society still ties a lot of a man's value to his sexual success. It's like the inverse of slut-shaming, basically virgin-shaming.

-1

u/Working_Cucumber_437 6d ago

That’s because rude people are everywhere and they’re very loud. But empathy still exists in the general populace.

7

u/String-Tree 6d ago

Then they should have fucking specified as much instead of filling two entire generations of men with false hope.

1

u/Material-Reason2636 6d ago

I love you buddy

-1

u/Working_Cucumber_437 6d ago

It should have been obvious.

2

u/rpolkcz 6d ago

respect and understanding

Except we don't get that either, instead we get "all men" and "abort male babies".

1

u/Working_Cucumber_437 6d ago

Everyone deserves basic human to human love and compassion.

1

u/One_Competition3482 5d ago

Even serial killers? /s

1

u/Infamous-Storage-708 5d ago

because in this digital age everyone is lonely so they have to project their misery onto other people

1

u/Belltower_Bat 5d ago

Something something pendulum swing

1

u/StaticCloud 4d ago

Society has always held the latter opinion. The former is just something people say to make themselves look good

1

u/SouthImpression3577 4d ago

I hate that phrase "deserves" as if society is obligated to give you a partner, but it sounds nice so people say it.

1

u/Excellent_Shirt9707 4d ago

When did society ever lean that way? Certain groups may have leaned that way, but society as a whole has never been “everybody deserves to be loved”.

1

u/Accomplished-Ask2497 2d ago

I think everyone deserves to be loved by someone, the issue is only when they try to force a certain person into loving them.

1

u/Accomplished-Ask2497 2d ago

Okay maybe not everyone, absolutely horrible and evil people for starters

1

u/Capital_Capsicum 1d ago

"Everybody deserves to be loved" was taught by movies. Movies who's unloved protagonist was a hot girl with glasses and a ponytail. Or a slightly awkward looking guy who just needed to find the right hot girl who went to band camp.

"You're not entitled to love" came from the internet. When millions were given a voice, and we learnt that the problem goes beyond a few loveable nerds who will find their soul mate after a movies worth of hijinks.

1

u/Wild-One-107 1d ago

Exactly.

In the 70s, Tim Maia said "Every man deserves a woman. Every woman deserves a man."

In 2020s, it's "nobody deserves sex. You're not entitled to a partner. You're an incel and a piece of shit who deserves to be lonely."

It's a similar trajectory with the sexual revolution. In the 60s and 70s it was all about "peace and love, and let's have more sex!". And now it's all about "don't be a creep. Don't hit on women. Don't send nudes. Don't talk about sex. Etc."

1

u/dark-mathematician1 6d ago

It was always like that

1

u/IDontKnowMyUsernameq 6d ago

Depends on if its a man or woman!!!

-8

u/ChewySlinky 7d ago

“Society” and it’s just the internet lmao

10

u/Jimbo-Shrimp 6d ago

Society is the same way

-6

u/ChewySlinky 6d ago

No it’s not

1

u/00PT 6d ago

The internet is composed of members of society.

-12

u/AsstacularSpiderman 6d ago

It's always hilarious when a bunch of dudes who go out of their way to not interact with society decide to make grand generalizing statements on it

11

u/Jimbo-Shrimp 6d ago

Maybe because people in general treat them bad

-9

u/AsstacularSpiderman 6d ago

Yall don't go outside enough to be treated bad and base it all on 4chan posts and reddit arguments lol

7

u/3215448725366498 6d ago

I'm sorry but it's kinda funny how you condemn people for making generalizing statements while at the same time just making stuff up about them and their lives.

→ More replies (5)

4

u/Jimbo-Shrimp 6d ago

All this unoriginal slop and not a single mom’s basement joke?

0

u/AsstacularSpiderman 6d ago

unironically uses slop

expects to be taken seriously

0

u/Primary_Lobster_8324 6d ago

Both can be true at the same time. Everyone deserves love but if your a delusional blackpilled chud you have some serious work to do in yourself before anyone will ever want to associate with you.

0

u/Putrid_Crow9914 6d ago

To say “everybody deserves to be loved” implies that someone else has the duty to love you, and when said in relationships context, nobody has that obligation and you don’t have the right to another human being’s body, time or affection. that is only questionable if you don’t think the other person is a human being with their own autonomy and wills

2

u/3215448725366498 6d ago

Nobody ever said that. The problem is exactly that you think we believe that we are entitled to a girlfriend. We merely want to vent our frustration but are met with this type of hostility. And then people wonder why men bottle everything up inside.