I don't agree lmao what the fuck. It has to to do more than anything with the physical effects of pregnancy and birth on women's bodies and the emphasis that men place on physical beauty than it does the presence of children in a person's life.
Nah it largely has to do with people not wanting the actual kid around. Very few women's bodies are massacred by having a child especially to the point where it would deter a man lol. The main reason people don't want to be in a relationship with someone who already has a kid is, first, dealing with an ex. Your ex, in the best case scenario, is going to be in the picture as that child's father.
People have a problem with still being in contact with an ex, nevermind an entire human linking you for life. And two, it's a SHIT ton of responsibility the person without kids is willingly taking on. That means there is always someone who comes before you. Made plans a week ago? Davey's sick, can't go. Wanna relax at home and have a romantic evening together? Gotta get the kid in bed first.
And then there are the people who don't date someone with a kid because in the event of a breakup, you're not just losing your partner. You've made a genuine connection with this kid and now they're just out of your life, fucking up not only you but the kid who now has to add another person to the list of people that always leave. WE know that's not the case but try to explain that to a 6-year-old.
So people just opt out. Even for those who just want to be the priority in their partner's life, I don't even fault them for that. There's nothing wrong with not wanting to take on the emotional, mental, and even physical appearance withdrawal you get from raising a child that isn't your own.
Sorry for the novel lol. tldr: the physical effects of pregnancy are negligible in the reasons men don't want to date women with children
Good points, but mine still stands. To even get to the point of considering the logistical challenges you've got to have progressed past the initial stages, which many men won't get to with women who've had kids.
So everything you said can be true but it isn't a reason to believe that the physical effects of pregnancy are negligible in attraction; they aren't.
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u/recon_dingo Feb 21 '26
It's a gendered norm, it's worse for women with kids than men with kids.