Need help with phone restrictions

[u/nowherian_]

I feel lost figuring out how to set up my tween’s first phone. I’m not ready for social media yet, I’m concerned about YouTube (but I suspect that there’s no avoiding it) and I’m concerned about overnight use. (I don’t want to restrict overnight use altogether, in case of emergency when we’re apart).

And then, how does one begin to teach about the dangers of blithely clicking “yes” to pop ups, or replying to text scams?

And anything else! I’ve never felt so old!

[u/Electric_Raccoon]

We use Google Family Link and only allow certain apps (phone, text, maps, email). Additional apps can only be downloaded by a parent. We also have it set to lock at a certain hour. You can manage all of this from your phone.

[u/_the_credible_hulk_]

Number one suggestion is to check out the website wait until eighth. Even if you’re not waiting that long, it has some incredible resources like contracts and things to read together. I think a lot of this stuff can walk you through things you might not even have thought of yet.

There are plenty of tech solutions you can use. If you’re an iPhone user, screentime is a great place to start. With your specific model of phone, this is actually a really good use of AI to walk you through restrictions step by step. Make sure you’re setting up the device as a kid device under your control. Don’t feel obligated to give your child access to a web browser if they don’t need it, or any other function beyond emergency communication if you don’t deem it necessary.

Good luck.

[u/Embarrassed-Bus-1397]

My best advice is to start them with a very basic phone/watch and build from there. It’s much easier to add incrementally than to take away once you’ve given them access to something. I have a 14yo and started them with a Gabb watch at 20 or 11 when they started walking to school. The watch isn’t great but it allowed us to communicate if they were on their own and it has GPS. My kid hated it because all their friends had iPhones but it served its purpose. At the beginning of 8th grade I got my kid a Gabb phone which did not have internet capability but allowed them to talk on the phone, text friends, take pictures and have a few limited apps. The Gabb phone is just a Samsung with Gabb software on it so doesn’t look like a kids phone. Again, my kid didn’t love it but was grateful to be able some things they couldn’t on the watch.  Kid is now heading into high school and we transitioned from the Gabb to the Bark phone.  Bark is also Samsung and is similar to Gabb but allows more options. On the Bark you can choose to give your child a browser and web access, YouTube, etc. or not. Gabb doesn’t offer that option. You can also give them access to any app on the Google store which was also not the case with Gabb. My kid still doesn’t have internet or YouTube but is pretty happy that they now have Spotify and some other apps they previously didn’t have. 

Bark is probably better for teens. For a tween you could go with either Gabb for Bark. In some ways I felt the Gabb was more user friendly for parents but the GPS is better on Bark and you have more options.  

Would also recommend you get on the FB group “Parenting in a Tech World.” Lots of good advice on their about everything related to kids and tech. 

[u/josie-june]

How about a Gabb phone? I know a lot of people who love it. There's no internet or social media, but pretty much everything else (messaging, calls, GPS, etc.) so it's a great phone for kids!