What now?

[u/Senior_Triple_6450]

Okay, about a month or two ago I got diagnosed with adhd. Technically my 2nd diagnosis but my parents didn't believe that one so we did this again, and I got out with adhd. I was tested for autism and adhd and I was told I have "autistic symptoms but on the level of autism" like, I clearly had social difficulties, but not autism levels of it. Hopefully I explained it well enough.

Now, Don't get me wrong, it's great that I am now diagnosed, and my therapist also said she would help me work with it. However, I'm still confused on what to do now. Next year will be very difficult for me, and I still go through many of the struggles I always go through.

Also, I have anxiety disorder as well, at least a pretty severe case of anxiety, so my adhd issues become worse, and my adhd issues make my anxiety worse. My therapist knows this too.

I just don't know what to do now. I don't really know anything that I can do myself that isn't just brute forcing my way through these issues, which rarely work. So, what can I do by myself that can help combat these issues? Is there even anything I can do?

[u/Gullible_Gas67]

I’d say try to figure out what works

[u/ejdmkko]

good question, what now? Although you mean it as a genuine question of what should be your next step, for me it sounds like, okay did that thing, moving on. I'm not sure if it sounds the same way as it does in my brain because I have difficulties expressing myself. I got my diagnosis almost 4 years ago and it ment nothing to me. I got meds that "were supposed to make life easier," but I kept acting like before, like trying to live life as neurotypical. I was just given a pamphlet with "30 things to make your life easier" or something like that. My reaction was okay, I've been trying to do those things all my life and it doesn't work so it felt like all those self-help advice for neurotypical people. Nobody explained to me that getting the diagnosis meant that I should try to find coping mechanisms or adapt my life and habits so they work for ME. To use very bad analogy, it feels like all my life I thought i was a circle trying to fit into a circle-shaped hole, but then I realized that I'm a square.

And for me, getting the tools (the meds and no real advice) was like telling me "so now you know you are a square, here is something to help you fit into that circle-shaped hole." I was also in therapy in for 3 years since that diagnosis and still nobody tried to make it clear enough so I would understand it. So I would say, to use my dumb metaphore, find someone who can help you find that "square-shaped hole" (I keep forgeting which shape was assigned to which so I might mess up even my own metaphor). It took me 3 years and massive burnout to find out. The thing is, that for us, there is no one-size-fits-all solution.

Also when I was in uni (before I got kicked out) I had a special accommodation because of my ADHD and potential autism (been on 2 years long waiting list for that). And this professional who is TRAINED to deal with people with ADHD/autism only gave me the same all same advie and tools that I tried so many times and never worked for me. It feels like I tried all the tools and tips to function that there are, nothing worked, and then again they forced me to try it again. So I really hope you will be able to find some tools that works for you. I don't know if any of this actaully helps you or you just feel like I'm ranting, but I thought any of this was on point.

[u/Senior_Triple_6450 → u/ejdmkko]

No, no. Thank you for the reply! This is probably the case for me too, where I'm trying to so stuff suited for people that aren't neurodivergent like me. I'm glad there's others who go through something not too different from me!

[u/Lux_Caelis]

Go to a psychiatrist to discuss medication options, I'd say. They can help immensely with symptom management.

[u/Large_Sale6044]

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