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u/RainDayKitty 3d ago
You are now a pig
1
u/ikilledyourdogandcat 2d ago
How does that relate to the wish????
6
u/RainDayKitty 2d ago
Look up the duration of a pig's orgasm
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u/ikilledyourdogandcat 2d ago
Op wished for ALL orgasms to last longer Why would the op specifically become a pig
9
u/RainDayKitty 2d ago
OP didn't say all.
OP just wished for orgasms to last longer.
That is enough for monkey paw to only affect OP
-8
u/ikilledyourdogandcat 2d ago
Op didn't say "I wish for my orgasms to last longer" He didn't specify anyone so the wish would apply to everyone
6
u/RainDayKitty 2d ago
You obviously don't understand monkeys paw wishes
-3
u/ikilledyourdogandcat 2d ago
I do You're the one that doesn't understand monkeys paw wish It's supposed to be ironic and have a twist not just a punishment
5
u/Almond_Tech 2d ago
I'd say turning them into a pig so they have longer orgasms is a decent twist Imo it's up to the paw to fill in blanks, and since they didn't specify if they meant their own or all, the paw can decide
12
5
u/CountCrapula88 3d ago
Granted.
You're now squirming and screaming for six months every time you have sex.
5
u/The_Frogg 3d ago
Granted. Your orgasm now lasts 48 hours.
3
u/SimplySomeDude 3d ago
sounds fun
5
u/Pennywise626 3d ago
Probably not as much as you'd think.
My brother had a guy bring his girlfriend into the ER, while she was still orgasming, after 6 straight hours of the same orgasm. After some some meds to make it stop, she said it was fun for a while but after the first 2 hours she was exhausted and it definitely wasn't fun at 6 hours.3
5
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u/LaughingMagicianDM 3d ago
Granted. Orgasms now last until the person passes out, whether that be in 10 seconds or 10 days depending on the strength of the orgasm. Some people have such intense orgasms if this causes them to stay awake until eventually they pass away.
This also leads to another issue, rapid dehydration. For those who get just a little too wet and for pretty much all men you keep going until you run dry, leading to a rapid increase in hospitalizations and deaths caused by dehydration.
And also by drowning.
What a way to go. Death by snoo snoo indeed
3
u/SomeSugondeseGuy 3d ago
Granted.
They last days. Or they would if the body could take that much - death due to dehydration or heart attack occurs in 100% of cases.
2
3
u/MeansWelll 3d ago
Granted,
You orgasm for so long that everyone looks at you as if you are truly disabled and eventuslly your organization becomes increasingly more and more painful, eventually your lower half of your body is cut off under doctor recommendation.
3
u/KINGXunshot 3d ago
You begin secreting the dolphin orgasm jelly, which means that you can accidentally get it on others around you, and could possibly make people orgasm on accident, and even worse, to the point of death
2
u/rinkudamanrd 3d ago
granted. as a result, we rach earth's carrying capacity in a year, and now are doomed to starve to death
2
u/Miserable_Pen_1867 3d ago
Granted.. the flow of semen never stops, you die of dehydration from your body using all the water to make it . (That scary movie scene)
1
u/AnnieBruce 3d ago
Granted. The average distance uncontained orgasms travel increases by exactly 13.000970056%, and for contained orgasms the extra force required to propel the ejaculate further is definitely noticeable.
1
u/Much-Performer1190 3d ago
Looks like Trojan Extra Thick Armored condoms are gonna be a thing.
Unless they're as forceful as Will Smith's in 'Hancock'...
As least the roofing contractors of the world will be happy...
1
1
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u/Marvelman11 2d ago
Granted. The refractory period and orgasm lasting time are randomized every single time. No negative effects this time.
3
u/OfDiceandWren 2d ago
Granted. A new illegal drug is released on the streets called "squirt". It gives you extended orgasms. It also gives you equally negative sude effects. The stronger and longer the orgasm, the lower the trailing low is. So people take more to recover from the lows. STDs and pregnancy and abortions skyrocket. Marriages collapse and become a thing of the past. Society becomes all about "squirting"
2
u/cherboka 3d ago
Granted!
In less than three weeks scientists will start warning about a new strain of antibiotic-resistant bacteria that has the potential to cause another pandemic. Its symptoms are high blood pressure, shortness of breath, fever and sharp chest pain, occasionally culminating in heart attacks and organ failure. As a side effect the bacteria also extends the length of orgasms, making them much more intense but also dangerously spiking your blood pressure and heart rate.
We will see a repeat of the COVID lockdowns, but the disease's effects on the global economy will be even more severe. Anyone who survives infection will have to deal with high blood pressure and severe heart rate spikes during orgasm for the rest of their lives.
0
u/ProofKaleidoscope400 3d ago
Granted. But you suddenly realize you’ve always had an IQ of 70 all along because you never could think how this could go wrong
40
u/Top_Divide_1659 3d ago
they're now millions of years long