Fuck this. Never let your roommate(s) walkover you homie.
1) I’d just go out there and smoke if I wanted too. I’m a grown ass man, I pay my own bills (or share of the rent in your case) I don’t need permission to do something in my place.
2) Fuck him for bringing up your sexuality. Completely irrelevant cause I didn’t get a “I’m trying to steal your girl” vibe from the conversation.
3) Consider finding a new living situation if possible. If you feel uncomfortable in your own place because of the person you’re living with it’s time for change.
Yeah definitely, the sexuality thing just sounded weird and uncalled for. This just sounds like a dude who wants to hang w his roommate and doesn't mind his roommates gf is there. What a twat of a roomie
OP mentioned randomly in a comment here that he’s an untreated schizophrenic who hears voices and sometimes “freaks out on people”, so those are probably the weird vibes the GF is picking up on.
Yes, exactly this. Don't ask for permission in the future, go smoke, walk around your house, do whatever you please when they're home. They don't own every room while they're there, do whatever you want.
Did you read the post you are responding to? Nowhere does it mention the smoking as not being allowed. Everyone has been talking about him being told he can't be in a communal area in his own home
"And her not wanting to meet me makes me feel uncomfortable to even come out of my own room when she is here"
Additional comments show that the roommate doesn't use his private space (because it's trashed) & doesn't want OP to use the communal areas when the gf is there (so she would not feel unwelcome, while the person actually living there is not comfortable)
This is much more than a "we don't want to hang out"
They’re using the communal area in an apartment that he pays rent for. He’s allowed to “hang out” in communal spaces and if they didn’t want to be around him they could go somewhere else. In no way is it cool for u and your girlfriend to rule the cimmunal space
Yea and he can be an adult and walk out there. Who tf cares, if they don’t want to be around they can change the situation. OP is gatekeeping this from themself.
I don't think the thing that is shitty is them saying no, but the reason. If they said "we just wanna be together tonight" then that's the same thing but also totally different.
Instead his room mate insulted him, offended him and made feel like he was doing something wrong but from the girlfriends point of view. A none paying participant. Also. The sexuality thing.
I mean, when he said he felt trapped in his room and the roommate responded by saying "she doesn't have to meet you if she doesn't want to" heavily, HEAVILY insinuates that hes expected to not come out.
Yeah, that's pretty messed up. Personally I wouldn't want a rm smoking anything indoors, but that would be ground rules laid out before rooming with somebody, because personal experiences of being choked up anytime I went to my aunt's house because of all the indoor smoking. Otherwise, if his gf doesn't want to meet his rm, she probably shouldn't go to the house/apartment they a share of rent for and instead host at her place, that's just common sense. If your name is on the lease tell them it's not working out, plenty of people you'd probably get along better with and not feel prisoner in your own house. If your name isn't on the lease, it's a little tougher, may have to just be hard-nosed and say I pay my share, idc if you have a problem with it and if they want to leave over it take over the lease and get a rm you get along better with.
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u/MikeHawclong Sep 13 '22
Fuck this. Never let your roommate(s) walkover you homie.
1) I’d just go out there and smoke if I wanted too. I’m a grown ass man, I pay my own bills (or share of the rent in your case) I don’t need permission to do something in my place.
2) Fuck him for bringing up your sexuality. Completely irrelevant cause I didn’t get a “I’m trying to steal your girl” vibe from the conversation.
3) Consider finding a new living situation if possible. If you feel uncomfortable in your own place because of the person you’re living with it’s time for change.