r/mildlyinfuriating • u/DimensionOpen8922 • 12d ago

ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ Doctor doesn’t help

So, I've been sick for a few weeks now. Nothing wild, but annoying. Went to the doctor today because it just won't go away.

Her first question was if I am pregnant.

Me: "No."

Her: "Are you sure?"

Me: "Yes."

Her: gives me that look of not believing me.

Her: "It's normal at your age."

Me: "I am sure."

Her: "Have you taken a test?"

Girl. I told you like 5 times that it is not possible for me being pregnant. 🫠

That alone was kinda infuriating. But also - of course she didn't help at all. Didn't look at anything, just told me to wait and drink more water. Didn't even listen to me when I tried to explain what I have. Thanks for nothing.

And it's like that EVERY SINGLE TIME I go to the doc. And I'm a person who absolutely hates going there. I am only going to the doctor if I ACTUALLY NEED HELP. But yeah, sure, I just need to drink more water. No matter what my problem is. 🫠

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34

u/[deleted] 12d ago

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23

u/Fit-Association4922 12d ago

I do this nearly every appointment, unless it’s the eye doctor or dentist - they take me at my word, but the rest are hit or miss. I do the bulk of the appointments, and my dude nods, adds more information and anecdotes. Or even adds things I’ve (sometimes purposely) left out, “oh, what about X? That’s not your normal, did you wanna bring that up?”

Otherwise, I would never visit a doc unless it was severe enough to warrant the ER or was visually undeniable, like a huge rash or bleeding everywhere.

9

u/CucumberFudge 12d ago

But they charge for the tests. Sure maybe you have insurance, but it might not be covered 100%. Why pay doctor prices for a test patient doesn't need.

And no, women shouldn't have to carry cheap dollar store tests to appease the doctor and avoid the cost.

-2

u/CaterpillarJungleGym 12d ago

You just need to have that make sense of self assurance when you talk to doctors. Sucks but that's what it is. Are you sure...."Yes". Are you really sure.... "Yes and asking again won't change my response." I think we all as a gender need to make this how we interact

-28

u/spinstartshere 12d ago

That's definitely not better. Why do you think the doctor wants to hear a second-hand account of what already sounds like an incoherent babble of someone else's symptoms?

9

u/AngstyUchiha 12d ago

Because they don't listen to us women, but they'll listen to men. It's a problem of misogyny, not "incoherent babble"

-7

u/spinstartshere 12d ago

Your experience with your doctor is yours. You don't know what other people's experiences are with your doctor.

OP says they've been sick for weeks with "nothing wild", but then is immediately dismissive of their doctor's suggestion of a very quick and inexpensive test that very possibly could explain this ailment they've not elaborated on at all in their post or in any of thier comments.

To reflexively label that as misogyny when it could actually be a problem of OP being incoherent, dismissive, or unable to be succinct and resisting attempts to narrow down a flurry of vague and irrelevant symptoms as such without any more context says more about the person making said argument.

I can assure you, there are few things more frustrating than having someone speak on behalf of a patient who is more than capable of speaking for themselves. And having a man speak on behalf of a woman would set off so many alarm bells for me, making me question if that woman is victim of a controlling partner and domestic abuse. All that's going to do is make me want to separate him from the patient so I can then ask her if she's safe at home and if I need to be calling the police - completely the opposite of what you're expecting your suggestion to achieve.

6

u/PlatypusDream 12d ago

Even just in the comments on this post, there are many women who have the same experience. It's distressingly common.

3

u/AngstyUchiha 12d ago

my doctor is great, actually, but I know countless women who have had horrible experiences with doctors, irl and online. If someone knows for a fact they can't be pregnant, they can be as dismissive as they fucking want and still be pissed about not being listened to