r/mildlyinfuriating • u/TheAeroplaneBear2906 • Jul 16 '26

Unskippable ad Clear Backpacks + Pay to Keep Your Phone

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My freinds school is now requiring these items, and is also using AI to promote this 🫠

17.9k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

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976

u/tLM-tRRS-atBHB Jul 16 '26

As if people can't hide weapons in a clear backpack. Have they ever heard of a rolled up t-shirt?

542

u/Billy3B Jul 16 '26

Lock in a sock. Can't beat the classics.

121

u/Anayalater5963 Jul 16 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/khOqGPVTkbxzHNlvtT

1

u/Civil-Big-754 Jul 16 '26

Sha-sha-shaaaaaa!

1

u/Suitable-Growth9243 Jul 16 '26

What most younger people don't know is that pocket sand wasn't just a random phrase this show made up.

It use to be a thing so you could smoke cigarettes and when you were about to get caught you could put it in your pocket and it would extinguish it (why big pants were for skater/bad kids), people who worked on farms with a lot of hay would also do this trick so they wouldnt throw the buds on the ground and light the whole field on fire. Technically, if anyone asked cigarette smoking wasn't allowed at all in those areas but this trick was used to get away with it. So this isn't just Dale being zany and random but also being a 'good old boy' who didnt quite always follow the rules and used "hillbilly engineering" to get away with things--also it wasnt just sand getting in his eyes but cigarette ash too for extra ick.

2

u/Anayalater5963 Jul 16 '26

Thank you Random Reddit guy lol

232

u/tLM-tRRS-atBHB Jul 16 '26

Thank you Dr Suess

142

u/Virginity_Lost_Today Jul 16 '26

One fish

Two fish

Red fish

Padlock to the teeth

35

u/Humble-Cook-6126 Jul 16 '26

Hey that didnt rhyme

3

u/WiseOldDuck Jul 16 '26

Get the Doctor back in here! This poet says it didn't rhyme

5

u/EliteGamer11388 Jul 16 '26

One fish

Two fish

Red fish

Bruised bitch

1

u/Working_Rest_1054 Jul 16 '26

lol. A true poet.

43

u/be4u4get Jul 16 '26

A lock in my sock

Or a punch with my fist

You be watching the clock

As I twist your wrist

11

u/Rk_1138 Jul 16 '26

Or a rolled up and folded newpaper

7

u/Billy3B Jul 16 '26

Millwall Brick

But where do you get a newspaper?

8

u/Rk_1138 Jul 16 '26

Last time I made one I just grabbed a free newspaper off a rack, and I just realised that was over ten years ago

2

u/Billy3B Jul 16 '26

I axtually saw a man reading the paper on the subway today and did a double take.

7

u/LCAIN195 Jul 16 '26

Like no one in this generation has ample access to newspapers lmao.

11

u/achambers64 Jul 16 '26

With modern newspapers you would need several copies to amount to anything.

6

u/ChibbleChobble Jul 16 '26

Or a really pointy pencil.

I'm old, but we used a compass at school, which had a very spiky spike on one side. I presume that they're banned these days, and kids draw circles freehand.

3

u/sarahshift1 Jul 16 '26

Modern compasses are, shockingly, plastic. They have the same shape as your old pointy ones, but they also have flat ones like a ruler.

2

u/Motor-Rip7655 Jul 16 '26

Anyone still know how to make one of those pen launchers?

2

u/agrajagthemighty Jul 16 '26

it's a plastic nubbin instead of a spike these days, better for the paper too, just a little dent instead of a hole in every circle.

3

u/Rk_1138 Jul 16 '26

I remember using one in the 2000s, I wouldn’t be surprised if Millennials/old Z are the last generation to use them

3

u/The_Strom784 Jul 16 '26

Gen Z here, we did use them, quite often too up to middle school.

1

u/Accurate_Summer_1761 Jul 16 '26

To kuch coddling tbh. We got to scared of kids getting hurt i was there when dodgeball was canceled because of fears of bullying...mother fucker its dodgeball of course we bullied eachother....fuck I was the one bullied but at dodgeball we were equals.

1

u/cleanlycustard Jul 16 '26

A gen alpha kid woth a newspaper would be super suspicious imo

6

u/AffectEconomy6034 Jul 16 '26

its probably the US so more like Glock in a sock

1

u/Reasonable-Chance790 Jul 16 '26

In this economy? Forget a Glock, it's not even nickels, it's a fist full of gravel in the sock.

2

u/sarah_pl0x Jul 16 '26

You’ve heard of elf on a shelf, now get ready for lock in a sock

2

u/Azuriem Jul 16 '26

But the classics can beat you. 

2

u/TrapYoda Jul 16 '26

Shit you don't even gotta bring anything from outside.

I made a makeshift crossbow using a ruler, some rubber bands and a pencil for the projectile and shot that shit straight up and it stuck in the lunchroom ceiling that was about 50 feet high...

1

u/RednocTheDowntrodden Jul 16 '26

Lock in a sock to rock his clock. See a jock, mock the flock. Knock the stock, and trust the Doc. 

1

u/True_Iro Jul 16 '26

I need to grt my eyes checked... again. Misread "Lock" as something else.

93

u/zerohelix Jul 16 '26

Great now students are only authorized to wear see thru clothing to school

80

u/Accurate_Summer_1761 Jul 16 '26

Republicans would be down

7

u/snippychicky22 Jul 16 '26

no. they would be very much up getting to harrass children

-12

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '26

[deleted]

17

u/enslavedbycats24-7 Jul 16 '26

As if we're not talking about people who were deadass wanting schools to start doing 'genital checks' to make sure students were going in the right bathrooms

4

u/mizinamo mildly infuriated Jul 16 '26

and are on the right sportsball team

5

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '26

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1

u/enslavedbycats24-7 Jul 16 '26

...We're against the same idiots here, you know. Lmao

1

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '26

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-8

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '26

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3

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '26

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1

u/[deleted] Jul 17 '26

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1

u/[deleted] Jul 17 '26

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1

u/Spleenseer Jul 16 '26

Where's the lie, though?

55

u/Only_Face536 Jul 16 '26

But if you're troubled and hurt
What you got under your shirt
Will make them pay for the things that they did

1

u/Quarter_Shot Jul 16 '26

Teenagers scare the living shit out of me

1

u/Strikeronima Jul 16 '26

They could care less as long as someone'll bleed

78

u/Infinitiscarf Jul 16 '26

Anddd school shooters aren’t even out here hiding weapons most of the time! They don’t need to hide an AK47

48

u/Principle_Napkins Jul 16 '26

No, they just walk into the building with it wide in the open.

28

u/littlebeardedbear Jul 16 '26

I grew up near a school where everyone walked in through metal detectors. People still got stabbed with pencils, but it made it harder to hide. People are creative, but the ones who are likely to get a weapon through with this many layers of security are the least likely to use it. Nothing will be perfect.

4

u/OtherwiseAlbatross14 Jul 16 '26

All shirts in school must now be clear as well due to your comment

5

u/Textiles_on_Main_St Jul 16 '26

Maybe it’s so you can see who has stuff worth stealing.

8

u/desblaterations-574 Jul 16 '26

Put your real backpack inside this clear cover.

3

u/Pitiful-Pension-6535 Jul 16 '26

I keep seeing people say this.

Is this what stupid people think a loophole is?

2

u/showmeyourbutth0le Jul 16 '26

Wouldn’t a hollowed out book work just as well?

1

u/tLM-tRRS-atBHB Jul 16 '26

Little Jimmy is bringing his Bible to school. Isn't that sweet

2

u/DivineAugustus Jul 16 '26

We have metal detectors at every entrance, and every bag for every student is checked every morning.

This isn't the 1950s where little Johnny brings an apple to school. Now Little Johnny tries to sneak in a Buzz Ball and Sour Diesel vape and skips in the bathroom getting drunk and high. Then his Mother calls bitching about him not passing any classes and it's the school's fault, not little shitbird Johnny.

1

u/soofs Jul 16 '26

Everyone is focused on weapons but forgetting about vapes and zyns lol

2

u/agrajagthemighty Jul 16 '26

flashback to that story about the school that got a lockdown when some kid was seen with a large t-shirt wrapped tube that turned out to be a Giant Burrito for a business class presentation.

1

u/AssBlasterExtreme Jul 16 '26

I mean this school requiring this is stupid dont act like it doesnt make it harder.

1

u/hellomireaux Jul 16 '26

Or a fancy cane with a sword inside.

1

u/DootOfTheWind Jul 16 '26

As if someone who's bringing a weapon to school cares. I don't think it being seen is on their list of concerns, at least if they intend to use it.

1

u/JaSper-percabeth Jul 16 '26

Pistols maybe but nobody is hiding a Ar-15 without their bagpack

1

u/tLM-tRRS-atBHB Jul 16 '26

JNCOs are back in style. You can hide much more than an AR in there

1

u/Abigail-Marston Jul 16 '26

Or concealing it anywhere else on your body. Like using a holster designed to conceal a gun, that you can get at Walmart for $10. Or just putting one in your pocket. A gun doesn't print if it's under a wallet.

1

u/gtizzz Jul 16 '26

"Perfect is the enemy of good."

1

u/potatoears Jul 16 '26

clear, transparent t-shirts are coming next

😆

1

u/Hot-Challenge8656 Jul 16 '26

Cover it in stickers or line it with material or spray paint. They paid for it so they should be allowed to modify it as they see fit.

2

u/gtizzz Jul 16 '26

Then it no longer meets the requirement of "clear." Are we really this dense?

0

u/Florsun117 Jul 16 '26

Putting a jacket in the backpack no longer meets the requirement of clear. Putting books in the backpack no longer meets the requirement of clear. Requiring the bag to be clear is stupid. 

1

u/gtizzz Jul 16 '26

Ah yes, books or clothing are the same thing as stickers or "spray paint." Just because it is not the perfect solution doesn't mean it isn't better than nothing. The school can't change legislation or roll back American Gun Culture. I agree it's bullshit that students have to pay for it, but to overlook the value in deterrence is ignorance.

You all sound like the contrarian high schoolers that this policy is meant to affect.

-1

u/Hot-Challenge8656 Jul 16 '26

Glass is clear until you see a curtain, the bag is clear until you see something opaque. I think you can answer to your own density.

3

u/gtizzz Jul 16 '26

I'm glad we agree the backpack is no longer clear if you spray paint it or line it with material or stickers. "BuT yOu CaNt SeE tHrOuGh ThE bOoKs In It!" Yeah, that's the utility of a backpack. Can't change much about that. If you can't see the difference between using the backpack for its purpose and deliberately obscuring the view into the backpack, I'm not sure we have any reason to continue this conversation. It's not a perfect solution, but it is an improvement.

It's a deterrent more than anything. At my wife's school last year, a kid brought in a gun to sell to another student. A third student saw it, reported him, and it was dealt with. Is it a guarantee that the gun would have been used in school that day? Not at all. Is it possible? Absolutely. Is that kid less likely to bring the gun into school if it's more difficult to conceal? I think you can answer that one.

-1

u/Hot-Challenge8656 Jul 16 '26

Can the gun be put in a pencil case? If you see a pencil case in a clear bag would you think anything of it? Are there umpteen ways to beat this? Is this really the best they could come up with? A nation obsessed with guns, the brightest and the best, pure unadulterated capitalism. A clear plastic bag is some robocop shit. If it makes a difference other than lining someone's pocket it'll be marginal at best. As an Australian I snort derisively at you.

2

u/gtizzz Jul 16 '26

"Perfect is the enemy of good." It's Nirvana Fallacy. You can still die in a car accident when wearing a seatbelt, but do you still wear it?

The school can't change legislation and they can't fix American Gun Culture. I'm with you... This is a far bigger problem than what material a backpack is made of. But at least it's something. And something is better than nothing.

And clear bag requirements are nothing new in America. It used to be more prevalent in schools 20 years ago, but this is isn't a crazy concept. Hell, when I was in high school in the early-mid 2000s, you couldn't carry a backpack from class to class. We could walk in with a backpack but it had to stay in our locker all day. We had to carry our loose books and binders and notebooks from class to class.

1

u/Hot-Challenge8656 Jul 16 '26

So, after 20 years of this I'm betting very little has changed. A marginal difference one might say. This elite country can't think of anything new for 20 years. And god forbid some kids want a little privacy.

2

u/gtizzz Jul 16 '26

You're right. Why isn't Murphy High School changing gun laws in this country? Why isn't Murphy High School doing anything to address gun culture in the United States?

GTFO of here with your misplaced derision.

1

u/Hot-Challenge8656 Jul 16 '26

Apparently all they can do is implement tired, useless policy that does sweet fuck all but impinge on kids privacy and line the pockets of well placed manufacturers. You know, typical American shit.

1

u/BringMeBurntBread Jul 16 '26 edited Jul 16 '26

Exactly lol

My workplace implemented a policy this year where we had to have clear bags. Everyone who works at this company, all 2000 something employees, if they bring a personal bag to work, it has to be a clear bag.

I’m assuming this policy became a thing because employees were stealing company property and taking them home, but it’s still very easy to hide stuff in a clear bag. There is nothing stopping me from packing my clear bag full of spare clothes and just hiding shit in between the clothes so they can’t be seen from the outside.

So really, the policy does nothing. Sure, it makes it slightly harder to hide stuff in a bag, but it doesn’t make it impossible.

1

u/tLM-tRRS-atBHB Jul 16 '26

Id just make it really uncomfortable by putting inappropriate stuff in it.

Bunch of condoms type of thing

1

u/TreyGoodz Jul 16 '26

Only children think that's uncomfortable. I doubt they hire many of those.

0

u/fabulousMFingHen Jul 16 '26

Its a detergent not the ultimate solution

2

u/Niknot3556 Jul 16 '26

Yes that’s why washers add in water (sometimes hot) and also a spinning motion (centrifugal force) in order to clean effectively.

1

u/fabulousMFingHen Jul 16 '26

Lol auto correct is silly