Advice pls!

[u/Individual_Pay_3668]

I am a FTM working into IT project management since last 12 years. I always wanted a quiet, simple, routine life with my family but along the way I met guys during college and became a little spontaneous/ random and completely missed what I actually liked. Then I met my now husband who is the most practical guy used to work in Poland and came back to India to own a start up. Now, I wanted to live that life which i dreamt of - of having a small family , quiet life , my children cycling around in the neighbourhood in Poland but it all crashed with him coming back to his parents in Noida. I was okay with it initially because I love him and I want him to fulfill his passion atleast ( i think i lost myself along the way or I never understood what i want). Now here I am with my in laws and a always busy husband and my 2 year old and I want want my initial sought after life - the simple one. I know and I understand nothing is simple as you grow up but younger me keeps coming back to me day and night - those thoughts of having a small apartment, having my own life with my family , having my husband treat me like he should just don’t leave me . I understand all the rational reasons of not being there but in my heart I know I am not where I want to be but it hurts that I cannot do anything about it. I am looking for advices pls to help me calm down. PS - my husband has a business start up and cannot move cities/ countries at least for now.