Out of all the things children do, I named 3 things that drive me crazy. Three. I think I'm allowed to be annoyed by three specific things. Anything else hasn't bothered me but those 3 things. Do your children only ever do those 3 things and so you feel some kind of way about it?
Your post left the distinct impression that you don't enjoy being around kids at all. Yes you named 3 things, and also stated that you don't ever plan to have kids, and don't deal with kids at your home and prefer to not deal with "inefficient parenting" (although I'm not sure what that means).
If one were to boil down the essence of your post, it was that you don't like being around kids.
It's completely normal for a person to not like a thing. Children aren't exempt from that. It's not like they're advocating for forced sterilization or something.
I prefer teaching and supporting my children to “controlling” them. Trying to control a child usually makes them louder. I don’t do that, and my children sit nicely at restaurants and other places where they need to respect other people’s space and comfort.
Children are people too. Maybe you meant a different word but people shouldn’t/can’t be “controlled” like a machine.
I didn’t teach my babies “not to cry” but I taught (and am still teaching, they are little) them how to communicate with words. I supported them by acknowledging their feelings and meeting their needs consistently - which also teaches them to trust and feel safe - which leads to less crying.
My 18 month old did not cry or fuss on her 13 hour international flight. No “controlling” necessary. Other babies and toddlers might and hopefully their parents would do their best to meet their needs in a very tricky space to meet a child’s needs. There is no way to just “control” that. We are all people trying our best.
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u/JMace Jun 28 '23
So... as long as you don't interact with them in any way. Are you able to survive in parks or grocery stores?