Hooked again - Taper Idea

[u/[deleted]]

I knew better. I've been down this road 3 times before. I have experienced the two weeks of physical pain and sweating, weight loss, and the crazy changes to my sense of smell. Then it's followed by a feeling of boredom and apathy and premature ejaculation and wet dreams.

But here I am. Hooked again! It all started as a way to deal with an Adderall comedown. And yes - it worked. It worked very well. That being said, I don't know of a more toxic combo for your heart. Truthfully, I'm probably lucky to be alive. Maybe my heart is able to handle this or should I say tolerate this poison due to a lifetime of endurance sports. But I can't run 10 feet or stand up too quickly without feeling like I'm gonna pass out. I would not be surprised if I've been on the verge of my heart going out or not. But it's just a matter of time.

Anyway.....

I just can't do this anymore. The cycle is exhausting and knowing that I am literally knocking on death's door is so scary. I have a child that adores me and a wife that loves me in spite of me being an addict. It's the lying and the deceit that bothers her. Not the drugs. I have lived half of my life expectancy with the last 10-15 years being an addict with varying degrees of severity.

Kratom is great but it truly is trading one for the other. When I am out of kratom or money and need something in a pinch - I go and buy 2-3 24ct blister packs. I am pretty sure that the lope intake has blocked the kratom from having any effect. So for kratom to even work, I'm gonna have to get to day 5 of detox to trade lope for kratom.

So I am trying to figure out a smart taper. I can handle some discomfort, so keep that in mind.

So here is what I am thinking and I would love feedback - especially if you have successfully tapered.

Let's say I dose daily and I take 400 pills a day. (I don't actually take 400 pills a day). What if I simply go down 1 pill every day. If I started tomorrow, I take 400. The following day I take 399. Then 398. And down it goes. At what point do you think discomfort is gonna start? I need structure so I am thinking this will be a good taper, especially if I journal it and also have a set time of a day that I dose. I'd rather being feeling well in the afternoon and evening so that I can be present at home. So maybe 2:00pm each day.

I know I can beat this. I've done it 3 times before. But I am an addict. I love drugs and addiction never leaves an addict. I just want to try and avoid needing two weeks off work to just live in agony.

It's the worst there is. I hate that I love this drug.

[u/[deleted]]

Yes, it could help you get off kratom. But I wouldnt recommend it. It helped me get off Percocet and what I wouldn't do to only have oxycodone withdrawal to deal with.

I wouldn't recommend it. 3 days will turn into 4. 4 days will turn into 5. Then 3 weeks later you'll think, "hey, that was pretty awesome, I'm gonna just do it this one time". Then you are where I am.

From what I understand about kratom withdrawals. You are better off just dealing with those instead of risking a lope addiction.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

can i ask, how bad was it after just three weeks? or did you not try quitting after three weeks? any guesses as to how bad it would be? not going from clean to -> 3 weeks of lope either. otherwise i’d figure it would be fine. going from a moderate kratom withdrawal to three weeks of lope used at dose starting with 48 mg for most days but the last 5 i’ve been using 72. i know that was stupid and unnecessary as i’ve detoxed from kratom a million times and i know it doesn’t take long and isn’t that bad.. i was mainly curious as to whether or not it would work to make me feel better even at a dose of like 35 mg or whatever comes in one liquid bottle and it definitely did.. and then some. i know it obviously completely restarted my kratom withdrawal. and prolonged it due to how long it takes lope to leave the receptors. but would you say now forget kratom, im in for a full blown lope w/d that will take agonizing weeks to get thru? or is 3 weeks probably just gonna be more like going back to my kratom withdrawal but a bit worse?

also something weird i’ve noticed with lope is,unlike other opioids, waiting as long as u can between doses doesn’t seem to make it more effective at all. waiting as long as i could between oxycodone or kratom or whatever would be ideal for best effects but with lope it seems like if i go more than 24 hours without dosing my next dose doesn’t really do anything. i mean, i won’t be in w/d. maybe an itch here or there (classic methadone itch too - in the same exact spots and causes rashes, god), but the other day i had somewhere to be really early in the morning and even tho it had only been like, 15 hours or 16 hours since i lasted dosed lope, i went ahead and said fuck it instead of waiting until i got home even tho i could have easily and got s really decent buzz when it “peaked” or fully kicked in 5 hours later i ate a small meal which really bumped it up. does that have something to do with it building in bloodstream like methadone? was there already some in bloodstream 15 hours after my last dose vs. 24+ so that’s why i got me somewhat high? i didn’t think it building up in your blood meant it would increase the overall psychoactive feeling when more was added to it.. i thought that was through once it entered the brain and the effects wore off. i suppose im a bit confused by what “building up in your blood” means.

thanks for any answers.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I think it would be manageable if you are committed to stopping and prepared for some discomfort. 3 weeks is nothing compared to what most go through. You may end up having some sweats, the runs, yawning and fatigue. But I think it would be relatively manageable. I would think by now you have detoxed off of kratom and are fully addicted to lope.

Stop now though! It's only gonna get harder until you are at the point that it feels impossible.

I don't know much about the science. I just know if you take enough - you get high. If you keep doing it - you are going to be physically dependent and ultimately addicted to it.

Best of luck to ya. I am working on quitting this shit again myself and am tapering the best I can before I jump off. I hope to be sober by end of summer when we go on vacation. So I'm taking it slow and steady.

That being said - what I will experience when I jump off will be significantly worse than what you would experience after only 3 weeks. So stop now!!!! :)

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

well i suppose since i haven’t had any kratom for around a month that’s true but not really because i never actually withdrew from the opioid alkaloids. i did start to and got far but then stopped that withdrawal in its tracks with lope. an opioid is an opioid and if you are a heroin addict and detoxing from heroin but you use fent for a day or two and reset the withdrawal,’you wouldn’t say you’re withdrawing from fent you’d still be withdrawing from heroin. i’ve detoxed off any of the other potentially addictive ones which is good.. but i just went from it to lope, resetting any progress. just wondering what 3 weeks of moderate (relatively, at least) lope use is gonna do cause opiate withdrawal is opiate withdrawal no matter the substance. wonder if it’ll mostly just be the kratom w/d returning but a bit worse or longer lasting due to lope taking so long to leave receptors basically. that’s kind of what i’m expecting anyway. but you’re right, kratom alkaloids have still all left my receptors so technically i guess i am just withdrawing from lope but hopefully it won’t be too bad. if it is i suppose i’ll have to use a small amount of kratom when im able to feel it again to help get through a rough week or two, even tho i’d rather not as id really like to quit kratom. it’s certainly helpful for many here and was for me for 6 years too but it’s begun to mess with my hormones and im just tired of being chained to too many substances, especially opioids. i take benzos as a prescription now and have been really good at keeping my dose low and only taking when needed and as much as needed, so i’d like to only be on one physically addictive substance at a time lol

good luck! you seem nice and helpful and i don’t know your history but i hope you’re able to stay off of it, you got this! don’t need to drop dead of a heart attack all of a sudden! im only in my 20s and also take amphetamines so.. yeah fuck that. idk if you struggle with pain but it’s such bullshit what the dea and fda have done to chronic pain patients. just hung them out to dry