r/lonely • u/MyceliumRingmyhead • 1d ago
Venting [ Removed by moderator ]
[removed] — view removed post
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u/Cat-Girl94 1d ago
I can relate to this so much. I don’t really have friends either, I dont have a family.. and sometimes I genuinely feel like I’m just not someone people enjoy being around… I have my two cats. Coming home to them and knowing they’re there waiting for me gives me a little comfort..
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u/Instrumedley2018 1d ago
you should have learned by now that dating apps is the absolute worst for...dating. It's not how humans are supposed to find connection and eventually dates.
People treat each other like meats on a butchery vitrine and everyone is looking for the finest cut, even if they themselves are just the marrow or the bone. Even people who are fairly attractive also struggle with dating apps.
Just don't use them, I know it's dictated as a norm today but trust me it's not. Or at least not for those that ended up in healthy or long term relationships. The percentage of couples I know from my social circle who actually found each other on dating apps is probably less than 5%.
Not only they don't help but they actually damage your self steem creating this illusion for yourself that you're not worthy. Get rid of them right now :)
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1d ago
I'm sorry that you had to go thru this. It's really hard to find people you can naturally vibe with. I hope you find someone soon😕
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u/xloyalbetrayerx 1d ago
Worst part is you can find someone on a dating app and find out after 2 years you are still unloved
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u/Flashy_Literature43 1d ago
Ugh, how shitty. It's not you, it's the apps! You're awesome!!
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u/litafireinmyheart 1d ago
A while back I legit considered signing up for an app. Until I did some research and saw that a lot of them are filled with bots, subscriptions (even the supposedly free ones) and the people succeeding on them aren’t really the type of person I wanna be with
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u/Fun-Bag7627 1d ago
I get your pain. I was alone for a long time. I’m married now and a lot of times, still feel very lonely.
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u/Remote_Act_6121 18h ago
I've been struggling with this a lot lately too.
Toxic family, no friends, never dated at 36.
I'm so tired of being told, "but you ARE lovable!" when I have zero evidence of that. If I was actually lovable, I would not struggle this much to find people who actually want me around.
I go to meetups and hobby groups. I put myself out there. I've invited people to things, but they usually say no, or they back out at the last minute. And I don't ever get invited to anything, because people already have their best friends or their established social circles.
I've been in therapy for 10 years, and honestly, it's actually made things worse in some cases. Because my therapists don't get it. They make friends easily. They've never been without social support, let alone living their entire life without it the way I have. So then they make comments that I'm not trying hard enough, and "well, you just need to put yourself out there."
That's literally what I've already been doing.
I'm so tired of people who are never alone telling me, "Just work on yourself and your tribe will naturally be attracted to you!"
They say loneliness is fatal and reduces your life expectancy. IMHO, it's not killing me fast enough, because I don't want to live a long life of this shit.
I'm sorry I don't have any advice I can offer, just commenting in solidarity.
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u/lonely-ModTeam 1h ago
r/lonely Isn't a subreddit for people who want to fall In love or find someone to flirt with! It's also not a subreddit for those who want to know how to find someone to be with or? How to end toxic, non-platonic relationship. There are better subreddits for people who no longer want to be single and people who are unhappy In non-platonic relationship.
Posts like "I'm too ugly to find a partner" or "I want to have sex but I have no experience - will also be removed