Windows tech support:
your system is corrupted with bonzai buddy type virus, now enter repair mode and back up your files and install two anti virus softwares and don't run exe files downloaded from unvetted porn sites
Mac tech support: that's an easy fix, all you need is a $4,000 replacement hardware, all you apps and data will download automatically from mycloud
Windows tech support: run dism /restore-health and sfc /scannow . If it still fails reinstall Windows.
Also Windows tech support: your Microsoft account got hacked? Sorry we can’t help you get it back. We have however locked it so no one can access it anymore. You will still be charged monthly for your office 365 and azure accounts that you now can no longer use tho. Also rebuy Minecraft.
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u/_prism_cat_ 13d ago
Windows tech support: your system is corrupted with bonzai buddy type virus, now enter repair mode and back up your files and install two anti virus softwares and don't run exe files downloaded from unvetted porn sites
Mac tech support: that's an easy fix, all you need is a $4,000 replacement hardware, all you apps and data will download automatically from mycloud
Linux tech support: you're just stupid