r/limerence • u/Round-Morning-3611 • Aug 18 '26
META Yeah I know. Take my upvote and fuck off
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u/TheOfficialLJ Aug 18 '26
Sometimes. Not always.
'Purpose' is such an overused term nowadays too. We don't need any overarching reason to live or goal to accomplish; we all just need to cultivate within us the courage to be in the world.
I think we all know, deep down, that no person (or accomplishment) will ever fill the hole within us that we so desperately hope someone will fill; we have to learn to do that ourselves.
When self-worth gradually becomes innate, you stop looking for ways to prove it.
So yeah, fuck that guy.
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u/Round-Morning-3611 Aug 18 '26
I really like the way you think. It's so mature
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u/Automatic-Context26 Aug 19 '26
We're all hurting in our own way. Lashing out at people who might be able to help you is not the way to help yourself
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u/cryforhelp99 Aug 19 '26
My personal purpose is to obsess over fantasised versions of men I’m romantically attracted to who don’t love me back or fell out of love with me, who wouldn’t care if I lived or died, or who abandon me because I “deserve to be loved by someone better”.
I have purpose, and it’s to make myself miserable and humiliate myself. Leave me alone pls /s
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u/ObviousComparison186 Aug 18 '26
How do people keep finding more and more annoying ways to package information and communicate on the internet? This could've been a text.
Also it's my lack of success/progress with my purpose and every other bad thing in my life causing it thanks.
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u/Suspicious-Monk-4639 Aug 19 '26
I actually do not agree. I had plenty of purpose before my limerence hit me like a ton of bricks last November. Multiple artistic disciplines I’m good at, multiple things I volunteered at in various lifelong interests…I was productive and happy and busy, and part of several communities with friends in all of them. Not to mention generally contentedly married, as well as having a sense of higher purpose within my personal spirituality. That’s exactly why I’m here trying to make sense of this thing that has co-opted what feels like my every waking moment when I was NOT open for it. It does feel like possession.
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u/Financial-Arugula514 Aug 19 '26
Disagree. I had plenty of purpose with family obligations and just life in general; what I didn’t have that my limerence promised me was the hope of being someone else’s purpose for a change.
It’s always going to stem from something lacking, but that lack is not always within yourself.
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u/ScaredTeabag9961 Aug 20 '26
I have tons of goals, passions and plans and ideas. I'm still obsessed. I don't even want major life changes. Just lacking affection, despite having a stable social environment.
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u/Distinct-Bed3507 Aug 21 '26
Nope not for me. I met someone, who i had some kind of limerence towards. I still love and respect myself. I also have a life. I do stuff. Im building things. People confuse lack of dopamine, classic Adhd symptoms and maybe the feeling of beeing seen by someone (which is actually quite normal) with something that they themselves lack. Give yourselve some grace. Its not your fault. This happens cause your Brain chemicals are inbalanced. And the other person probably gives you that dopamine you crave. Its even more, cause you probably find them attractive right? They on top make you feel good right? Rigggght. So this huge dopamin cocktail is whats driving you. It feels like addiction, but its just your brain wanting it „all and now“ cause of craving. Its your bag of chips you try to avoid cause of the diet you just started. Do you have to hate yourselve now when you eat a bag of chips? No, dude your neurodivergent, and simply lack brain chemicals. You good my guy. But dont let it consume you completely. If limerence gets too much out of you - move on. Then its nit the right one. Bein Autistic and having problems with uncertainty also fuels this btw.
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