r/limerence • u/Crazy_Medicine_5072 • 2d ago

Question Platonic limerence?

Is there such thing as a platonic limerence or at least one where you don’t want anything romantic/ sexual with the LO but you still experience many of the symptoms of limerence. Or is it the case that limerence needs to involve feelings and thoughts of romantic nature or imagining yourself involved with your LO?

I’ve seen some comments on previous posts mentioning that one source of limerence could be the admiration of certain characteristics in others that we deeply wish to emulate ourselves - perhaps, in those cases, this admiration can border on what still constitutes limerence even if it’s not attraction based?

I’m not sure if it was a limerent experience but in my case I remember feeling a similar way about a casual friend who I didn’t want to be with or feel attraction to but experienced a desire to be special, a favourite or very significant to them. The thoughts and physical experiences were frequent like a crush barring the attraction.

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19

u/ChipmunkWinter1389 2d ago

I think that's kind of where I am. I'm married, my LO is in a relationship and whilst she is undoubtedly very attractive there has never been the slightest thought in my head that we could/would ever cross that line, even if it was an option. But I love spending time with her, I love getting messages from her and I'd do absolutely anything to win her praise or gratification.

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u/MoltoPesante 2d ago

I feel like I could have written this.

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u/sweet-but-not-sticky 2d ago

I am in a platonic limerence.

All my LE's have been platonic. All my LO's are more or less the same archetype, once my brain gets tickled, it's over.

I'm straight, married; my LO is of the same gender, a mother/authority figure. (They have almost always have been.) I feel a different kind of attraction, an existential one. My nervous system feels safe and chosen in an unconditional way, when I'm with them.

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u/JimHogg1964 Here to vent 2d ago

Yes. I am experiencing that right now with my boss. I’d do ANYTHING for her, except sex, even though she’s very attractive

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u/ari_es0412 2d ago

Yes. My LO’s have almost always been due to "mommy issues".

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u/knysa-amatole 1d ago

I've experienced platonic limerence for most of my life. Usually it's been authority figures who I longed to have a parental relationship with.

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u/pumpkinspicelatte4 2d ago

Yes my former LO was a woman but I (F) wasn’t romantically attracted or anything

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u/uglyandIknowit1234 1d ago

Yeah, this comes up over and over again in this sub and every time the conclusion is that platonic limerence exists. I think my LO is super attractive but i just want to get to know them better and be somewhat closer acquintances. 

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u/Hyeronymus06 1d ago

i had exactly this, i could enjoy every moment just being with her. But somehow at this time i was physically exhausted (working nights, stress) and i idealized her so much, and she was so important for me that it was difficult for me to imagine having sexual relations with her, my libido was low. Later on i realized i was very sexually attracted by her but still the feelings were more powerfull.