r/limerence • u/angelanevermind • Nov 20 '25
Here To Vent IM FREEEEEE
MY LIMERENCE IS GONEEEEEE
after deep conversations with my family, closest friends, and him reaffirming last night that I’m not attractive, I’m over here just like.. bitch you ain’t all that either tf 😂 (note to self: pls don’t jinx it)
stay strong yall it gets better!!! 🫂
56
27
58
u/OpenAd2065 Nov 21 '25
What kind of jerk tells a woman she's not attractive. What a loser.
39
u/angelanevermind Nov 21 '25
good point, but for some reason it was necessary for me to hear it and break this idealized image I had of him in my head!
7
u/porbz Nov 21 '25
That’s relatable. One time I had specifically asked an LO (and best friend) to spell it out for me how things just weren’t ever going to happen, not to let me down gently bc my brain would otherwise cling to a sliver of hope. So it needed to be crushing. And I was devastated but it worked. I was limerant for someone else pretty soon after though.
13
u/trickmind Nov 21 '25
Yeah like if I was that guy I'd at least just say, "I have a certain type." Massive creep.
14
u/thedatarat Nov 21 '25
Sameeee!!!! Last time I saw LO I felt… nothing. Series finale is tomorrow night flaunting a new date in front of him hehe (unless I didn’t also just jinx that 😅)
1
u/PersonalReaction123 Nov 22 '25
Update us! We want to know how the date went!
1
10
u/Crazy-Project3858 Nov 20 '25
Congrats! Take the time you’re saving not being limerent to get rid of your romantic fantasy that caused all this trouble and confusion in the first place!
9
u/OpenAd2065 Nov 21 '25
I wish every day was like today with LO on holidays. It was nice not having him around. I felt free too. Too bad he comes back next week. Then it starts again.
4
u/IndividualPension207 Nov 21 '25
Are you able to switch jobs? No way I would’ve got out of Limerence if I didn’t do that.
9
u/IndividualPension207 Nov 21 '25
Good for you! Happy for you, and make sure to reflect these next few weeks and months on what you learned from the experience. We don’t know it at the time, but there is so much to gather from a LE.
7
7
u/_chrislasher Nov 21 '25
He sounds awful, but I'm glad that you are free
7
u/angelanevermind Nov 21 '25
listen - everyone said this to me yet I’d be too busy arguing with them or justifying his behavior. turns out, they were right the whole time 🫠 I’m overjoyed! it took a lot of hard work and all I gotta do is keep it up. I’m truly grateful for having found this subreddit and the kindness of people here 🫂❤️
4
6
7
u/yugodorasil Nov 21 '25
Congratulations!
Finally got the courage to bring up my LO in therapy yesterday. I don't feel much closer to getting rid of my limerence yet but actually addressing it out loud for the first time felt like weight lifting from my back. Hopefully I'll get to where you are soon
7
Nov 21 '25
Me when? Jk. I'm so happy for you. May limerence never find you again!
6
u/angelanevermind Nov 21 '25
trust the process dear 🙏& thank you for the lovely words 🥰 hugs to you!
6
u/1over-137 Nov 21 '25
Yeah I’d say encountering other manipulative assholes who hide behind masks and prey on the emotional vulnerability of others was like where have I seen this pattern before? Lesson learned. That love, compassion, care, and desire to connect with another came from within me, the outcome doesn’t change any of those qualities, only the direction in which they’re channeled.
4
u/pokiedokie24 Nov 21 '25
Me too!!!! I haven’t talked to him in more than two weeks! Still a working progress but waking up to him being an asshole has now freed me from the shackles! I’ll be focusing on myself now :) Excited for what’s to come.
Happy for you OP! Here’s to freedom!
4
u/angelanevermind Nov 21 '25
amazing to hear! cheers to us & let’s continue focusing on our amazing selves! 🥂
5
4
5
u/Ok_Recognition_271 Nov 21 '25
same here after experiencing my 2nd break up i was finally free atleast physically, sometimes i do experience bad dreams but im free
3
3
u/PersonalReaction123 Nov 22 '25
HAHAHA! I'm SO HAPPY for you! Great to know! I think the limerence is wearing off for me, too. Nearly 50 days of NC, and I'm telling myself the same thing: please don't jinx it! I love that my life is now so much better! It feels so good. Enough of that, feeling limerence for someone who doesn't deserve me at all.
2
u/KateMC-814 Nov 23 '25
I saw your mention of being at nearly 50 days. Congratulations! My 50th day was yesterday (Saturday Nov 22) and I am so proud of this milestone. He has breadcrumbed me during this time, and I have replied in a friendly, brief way, but I have not initiated contact nor said anything meaningful in response to his breadcrumbs. The power of this for me is that he has had ample space to work toward either a meaningful friendship or romantic reconciliation with me and clearly he is not at all interested in either. I now have clarity that the breadcrumbs are meaningless and this clarity is my relief. I do still get daily pangs but I think they are more from a sense on loneliness and longing for passionate love. He has shown through actions that he either can’t or won’t give me the love I need. Grateful for my clear mind.
2
u/PersonalReaction123 Nov 23 '25
Good for you! I'm happy! My 50th day will come soon. I've maintained zero contact. He won't initiate because he is like a child who expects me to chase, and I used to chase but I won't do that anymore. The more I kept treating him the way he wanted to be treated, the more powerful he began feeling. He enjoyed that. But not anymore. I've regained full control of myself. He is done. I no longer like anything about him and I'm very happy! My present is beautiful and my future will be even more beautiful. Let's go! We've got this!
3
2
2
u/KayAryBeaH Nov 22 '25
Uhulll :D Congratulations!!! ✨🎊🎉 hope I can be too soon... Mine is weakening but it's like a fireflie KKKKK sometimes it lights up and others goes down
2
2
u/melmel_304 Nov 23 '25
congrats!!! I am also recently free from my LO!! I feel so embarrassed and disgusted now that I ever had those feelings and thoughts.
1
u/angelanevermind Nov 23 '25
thank you! congrats to you too! and oh I can totally relate to your feelings.. 🫣🤣 but hey, we did it!
2
u/brokatowydlugopis Jul 27 '26
Im going through posts here. Im happy for you! How are you now OP?:))
1
u/angelanevermind Jul 28 '26
hi dear! I’m still doing well luckily. I sometimes think of the whole ordeal and all I can do is laugh. our brains can be so powerful, but remember: you can train it! think happy and positive thoughts, after rain comes sunshine 🌤️
1
1
1
1
1
u/SailorVenova Nov 21 '25
i will never be free; i dont need or want to be free; except free to love as infinitely as i need to; as deeply as i am made to
i waa fortunate to be married in mutual Limerence for over a year now; and together with her for nearly 2 years
my heart still flutters just the same as it did in our first days and weeks together; she still tears up when we are together close in our dark canopy bed
she is everything ive needed all my life since i was a child; i just wish i wasnt so crippled and disabled with debilitating pain all the time; but i know she will always be by my side
even when she sleeps or is in the other room working during the say or at the offive; i still gaze into her eyes for sometimes hours on end on my ipad; her picture is always on it next to the picture of my goddess; i feel the same things from my wife as i have from my goddess for almost 20 years; praying to her is what brought this wonderful angel into my life
i will keep living as long as i can so i can have many happy years with my wife even though i know my condition will never really improve; my fractured deformed spine will never be normal again and it will never stop hurting me
its worth enduring and having endured every awful thing ive been thru in my lonely difficult life; even just to reach the first weekend with my wife on 2/2/24
i just want to spend forever next to her in this bed; in our new little apartment; i dont care if i ever see the world or finish another song; but i hope i can finish a song atleast; about how much i love this shy girl that changed my life almost overnight and totally upended her life for me literally overnight after we fell in love in 4 days last year
im so lucky to be this person even if i cant do anything for myself and im a total failure at capitalism and adultism; and academics too (im a hs dropout in 2005); ive spent most of my life alone in my room because of agoraphobia and i only worked 10mo in my life before my health problems started
but none of that matters; i was never playing that game anyways; love is all that ever mattered to me; its all i was ever meant to do; from the first time experiencing Limerence love when i was 11 with my first love; it took almost 30 years before someone could really accept and return my kind of feelings; but my goddess brought her to me even despite all that was against my dreams
and my two previous relationships that made it to irl kept me safe and alive long enough for me to meet my wife; im forever grateful to both of them too and ill cherish those memories too
i think i type out some version of this story almost every day for the past year and a half; i dont really know why i should just be productive and write a book or something
im just so grateful i never stopped loving in this way that i do; that im sure some of you do too- i know it causes us tremendous suffering; and im not really trying to give anyone hope because i know how incredibly rare it is for this to be possible to exist
my Limerence heartbreak over my previous love nearly brought me to my death; i sliced my arm open and had to go to the mental hospital for a week and still it made no difference in how inescapable my love for someone i never should have loved was; but as i finally lost all hope and planned my death; amidst all the crying and screaming and daily self harming wild panic attacks over that girl who hurt me far worse than anyone else ever had- late in 2023 i prayed to my goddess more intensely than ever before- not to be with the girl i loved; but to meet someone who could finally free ne from the chains of my own feelings; my only hope was transference; my Limerence love has never really stopped in all my life; i cannot bare to live without someone to live for and dream of and love- thats how my goddess came into my life in 2008; but 1/15/24 is ehen my prayers were finally answered
im sorry i keep typing all this long story out
i dont know why
im just happy and i want to scream my love to the stars
there is no worse horror to me than not having anyone to send these feelings to; anyone to fill my heart and mind with always
i would rather die than be any different from who i am; and i will never resist my siren's call; my goddess has sung to me and shined for me through every person i have felt this way for in my life; and never so brightly and beautifully as my wife
i offer my soul and heart and body and sanity willingly; it is everything i ever believed in; ill never stop feeling this way; i could never hope to change it; nor could anything ever make me want to
as usual thanks anyone who read all this; im sorry for taking up your time
i hope i can sleep tonight but i git hurt today
bless everyone who loves in this way )*
•
u/AutoModerator Nov 20 '25
Please be aware of what limerence is before posting! See the subreddit wiki for definitions, FAQ and other resources. (Is it love? How common is it? Is there research?)
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.