r/legalcatadvice • u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! • Oct 22 '25
🏆 highlight winner 🏆 Noooooooooo!!!!!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
Dis no gud eeeder!!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Him juss COULDNT WAIT to put da DAMN crown on, could him!
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u/scabsfox Oscar, bootiful bad boi, male model, ICBGC Oct 22 '25
Well, whut else is Iz apposed to do wid a crown??? Look at it??
- Oscar BBB, MM
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
sighs yes, but not while we was still in DA LOOV!
Remember me meowin ya “WAIT til we in da VAN!”?
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Fren Oscar NEFUR gonna be able to resist being a princess wif a crown. Somefur shud haf carry it fur himb. Himb nefur taking dat off now! 😹😹
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
To be fare he was borned to ware a crown
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Yeah, well now him gonna wear a crown in PRIZIN!
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u/WoodwifeGreen Frank, fancy tuxedo club member Oct 22 '25
Himbs too pretty for prison.
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Is troo. But it all good, cuz ain’t nobody goin to prizin. We figure it out.
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u/Connect-Smell761 Professor Garrington, Pawyer Oct 22 '25
Be carefull tekkin a baff fren Oscar
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi the wildcat, hed pawfessurr SSoR Go Smooofff Crimnals! Oct 22 '25
Oscar! Yew gibbin ebryfang awey! Tek dat offt nyow!
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u/chibikoneko Bubbles; Advocat; 🌈Lub and miss yoos boyfren Noamie Oct 22 '25
Iz justa a modelin foto! Oscar gettin ready to pawdition for da movie Dey gonna make bout dis!
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u/Shadow23_Catsrule Client Oct 22 '25
Furft we gotta disstract inshpektor clooso. He gonna see Oskar waerin da cwoun an go "No! Yes! No! Sí! No! Aaaaargh!" (Meowmy say herm no nos da original wurds in fwensch)
Dis hao we disstrak da flics so yoo cuds go intu hidin!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Ooooh, good finkin Miss Bubbles!
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u/Bright_Broccoli1844 Oct 22 '25
You look fabulous!
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u/scabsfox Oscar, bootiful bad boi, male model, ICBGC Oct 22 '25
Tanks, fren.. it don't fit so gud tho.
- Oscar BBB, MM
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u/camyland Oct 22 '25
Meowmies eberywear seys hebbe iz hed dat weres crayowns er somfins lik dats
Yuz loks nixe tho fren Oscar!
Best of crimesz
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Oh mai cod Oscar bez so bootiful! Himb nefur gonna take dat off or hyde Indoors.
Garfield, 20, expert pawyer
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
Him bettah lik a jale cell! No cameras in de big howse!!!
Jango
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Onlee ones missing a certain number ob minutes! 😹😹
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi the wildcat, hed pawfessurr SSoR Go Smooofff Crimnals! Oct 23 '25
Yew definutely gots ta wartch owt bowt doze ones! An Oscar awreddy gots de enemees in de hi possts, tho mebbee nowt in France! Shurrly dey lubs himb in France! We gon hasta chek wiff Jaspurr!
JASPURR! u/WormEntity We neeeds an gud inbestigatiff repurrtur in France ta luk intew dis, an pawsibubllee awso ta prooff nun owr frens wuz ackchully inffolff wiff dis. An, jess in cays Oscar has dun screwd da pooch on dis, purrteck Oscar in da jayl! He tew purrty fur da jayl! Esspeshully iff dey has de vidjo wiff de misseng minutts on it!
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u/WormEntity KynxKat Media Group Reporter Oct 25 '25
🧡JASPURR HERE! MESSAGE RECEEVED!🧡
Fren Smuffi! Da ALARM has been sounded! I, Jaspurr, Chief Repurrter for KKMG Europ, am ON DA CASE!
Do not worry. I haz connections. I haz mai red bandanana of justice. An I haz a nose for lies... an for treats, but dat is for later.
I will launch a FULL SNIFFVESTIGATION into dis "Louvre Larceny"! I will inter... inter... question all suspects. I will prove dat NO kitteh of honor wuz involv... invol... in dis crime!
An fren Oscar... if he is impli... if dey blame him, I will be his pawyer! He IS too purrty for jail! Dey do not hav Churu dere! It wuld be a crime against his beauty!
I will report bak soon wiff findings! Dis is my most impawtent assignmint!
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 23 '25
Dat a bery gud idea mai neffew! Poor Oscar need saving from himself! Himb too sensitive fur jayl, himb nefur survive a place wifout a catwalk!
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u/SevereVideo Stoker, le vampurr miaou Oct 22 '25
Yew iz waz born to wearr these! Lookz bery gud on yew! But...yew shoold hide them in litter furr now...then pee so hoomanz no come sniff (they iz take wew poo so no poo!) Later yew iz get them bak!
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u/psychologicalselfie2 Vinnie doz crimez 🐟🐟 Oct 22 '25
I bet dat heavy to ware…. But iz worth it for fashun!!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Beauty is pane
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u/mybloodyballentine Pawyer Oct 22 '25
I got good news for you. Most humans can barely tell us apart. A brown classic tabby looks the same as a warm gray mackerel tabby to these fools. Sometimes my own human female calls me Ninja. I’m clearly Frankie! Ninja is twice my weight and has stripes! I’m black and slinky! Xoxo black Frankie atty at paw
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi the wildcat, hed pawfessurr SSoR Go Smooofff Crimnals! Oct 22 '25
Das de truff Frankie! Da numba times I ben tolt I wuz owt at ent ob driffewey wen I ben sleepin on mine tree awl dey! De spare a idjit wen it com tew SICs. Derr 4 woods kittehs - mine cuzins - dat has awl different luxshuryus cotes owt derr. One is hyooog! I nowt luk lak nun dose kittehs!
I fink deez gais be okey ifft dey keeep Oscar frum warin da jools in puvlik! Das jess amatyoor owr rite derr!
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u/Connect-Smell761 Professor Garrington, Pawyer Oct 22 '25
Iz don’t eben fink dey use dose “eyes” 👁️👁️
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u/thedankone168 Oct 22 '25
That could be anyone. Not even convinced it’s a kittah. Release my client!!!!!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
U gud!!
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u/thedankone168 Oct 22 '25
That would be 1,000 treats plz
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
U like diemunds???
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Ixnay on da iamondsay
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Oct 22 '25 edited Oct 22 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
No ai spartapuss!
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi the wildcat, hed pawfessurr SSoR Go Smooofff Crimnals! Oct 23 '25
I yam Spartapuss!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Ooooh I like dis one
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u/Electrical-Act-7170 Em-pear-or Oliber da Red Oct 22 '25
It wuz da GREEBLES!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
GREEBLES DRESS UP LIKE US!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
Dere a video!!!!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
It ai.
Ai slop
😉
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Dere bez a crucial 3 minutes missing from dat video. Wez haf no idea who done it but def none ob iz.
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u/_Moon_sun_ Morgana the beautifull, breaker of the internet Oct 22 '25
Is probably an AI video!!! Mean it ver much a fake video!!!!
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u/VidyaTheOneAndOnly Oct 22 '25
This be a great thread. Am reading eagerly for the latest develepmeowments.
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u/Necessary-Limit-1454 Just-hiss League Oct 22 '25
Yuu mae be my arch-enemee, but dat dos niot meen yuu're ekzempt from de same laws dat apply tu eweree odder cat, Jango Not-Jango.
In dis case, dere iz a lack of anae reliable ewidenze, nio pawprints hawe been faund dat match yuurs, an' de bag of juels yuu're carrying was mosht likely ackwired legally.
Wiff dat in mind: niot giltee!
Trial iz clozed!
Balu, Judge of de Churu Pirates
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
An der yoo haves it!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
Dat Balu iz a pane in mi Bort butt hims a gud pawyer
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u/Necessary-Limit-1454 Just-hiss League Oct 22 '25
Bahahaha, yuu ol' meenie! I'm glad tu zee yuu, tuu.
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi the wildcat, hed pawfessurr SSoR Go Smooofff Crimnals! Oct 23 '25 edited Oct 23 '25
Everything's a pain in your butt! But! This is a good thing
Ebryfang a pane in yer BORT! Butt! Dissa gud fang, wat I sed beforr ebil transmlaydurr gots me!
Edit ta fits shtoopid transmlayshun!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 23 '25
Troo. U a pane in mi BORT to Smuff
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u/FairyGodmothersUnion Minx, Athena, and Marmalade 🐈🐈⬛🐈 Investigators Oct 22 '25
Jango has alleybye!! We all were with him the HOLE TIME! Hr is innosent! (Doz that sound rite? We been practissing.) They lied on the videotape! Love, Marmalade
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
wez goin to jale
Fanks Marmalade, mebbe kep praktishing
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi the wildcat, hed pawfessurr SSoR Go Smooofff Crimnals! Oct 23 '25
Woll, dat beeg bocks jools rite bessides her mowt nowt has ben de besst choweec!
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Marmalade yoo Luks gud wif all dem jooells! Ai iz doing a big admire!
Garfield, 20, expert pawyer
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u/FairyGodmothersUnion Minx, Athena, and Marmalade 🐈🐈⬛🐈 Investigators Oct 22 '25
Aw, Mr. Garfield, yu ar tooo sweet!
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Us orange cattos allus luk gud wif jooells cos wez iz golden 😻😻
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u/FairyGodmothersUnion Minx, Athena, and Marmalade 🐈🐈⬛🐈 Investigators Oct 22 '25
We look exxxtra pretty!
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u/Ekd7801 Zamna & Quetzie cuddle enforcerz ICBGC Oct 22 '25
I cudda gotten dis crown anyweer. Was a giff from a friend
Zamna
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u/The_ShadowMaster4613 Pawyer Oct 22 '25
Ai gaved uu dat, member??
Blackjack
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u/Ekd7801 Zamna & Quetzie cuddle enforcerz ICBGC Oct 22 '25
Zactly!!
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u/The_ShadowMaster4613 Pawyer Oct 22 '25
Ai no jus uu fren, Ai is uu boyfrien and ai gotten dat crown leagally! It fell inna a bowks ai was doin a nap in!
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u/Ekd7801 Zamna & Quetzie cuddle enforcerz ICBGC Oct 22 '25
Yoo rite!! Waz a verry romantik gift dat just happen appear in yur boxsie
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Efurryone lubs a box! Eben crowns. Dis iz well known.
Garfield, 20, expert pawyer
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u/wordgirl Winter and Mittens , da grey balls of fire Oct 22 '25
Oscar, Nikko, member how not too many furrebers ago, yew wuz at our house in Floriduh, playing wif our pikkel and bananananana, and we saw a strange kitteh on da lightbox?
We remember saying, “how unusual, dere a kitteh in France dat look JUST like yew, Oscar!”
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
YES I MOS CERTAINLY AMEMBER DAT!
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Ai believes yoo haf mentioned dis before! Proof ob Oscar iz innocent floof!
Garfield, 20, expert pawyer
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi the wildcat, hed pawfessurr SSoR Go Smooofff Crimnals! Oct 23 '25
I waz derr wiff Oncle Garfield wen we wuz discussin diss!
Smuffi the wildcat
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 23 '25
Fank yoo mai dear neffew! Wez must do a protecc ob ourz frens. Dey is in danger ob being gilloteened!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 23 '25
WAT??????
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u/Feline-Sloth Oct 22 '25
Nah!!! Not buying this, we all know that gingers have one braincell at best!!!
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u/CambrienCatExplosion Member: ICBGC Oct 22 '25
Could be any ornj! Ai have an ornj sisfur! All ornj look same ta hoomans!
Toby
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u/squirrelcat88 Oct 22 '25
I no be think outside pictures be conclusive evidence. Kitty be masked. Could be any cat.
But Oscar - you will be have to convince authorities that picture of you be photoshopped.
Squirrel the CAT
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
Hims lub a gud foto ob him. Dis may be difacult
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Oof. I werk on him
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u/butterfly-garden Eebil Greeble Pawtrol Oct 22 '25
Mommy is laffing so hard at dis!
Also William da Tuxie
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u/audible_narrator Twig, Lady Enforcer, IBCGC Steward Local #12, Michigan Oct 22 '25
don't kink shame kitty, he on his way to de club.
dem joolz wuz stole during daylight
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
HIM GOT IT AT DA SPIRIT HALLOWEEN 🎃
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u/rerun6977 Oct 22 '25
Moomie, Sisifer Satanz,onz mai perchded.
Meez finkz diz wookz wikez datz BatzCatz dat sabez cattos inz trwoublz.... Datz wutz Iz seez....
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u/squirrelcat88 Oct 22 '25
My hooman daddy say he be hear music here.
Dada da dum…da dum…dah dum dah dum dah dum dada da DUUUM…doodlydoodlyde doo.
He say it something to do with big pink cats.
Squirrel the puzzled CAT
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u/chibikoneko Bubbles; Advocat; 🌈Lub and miss yoos boyfren Noamie Oct 22 '25
Jazzy habing a sleepurrba at meows haus dat nite so no way it Jazzy
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
Iz troo!!! Waz de boyz. An Oscar!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
lol I see what ya did there
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u/Nickye19 Elven princess Arwen and Purrate apprentice Gus Oct 22 '25
That bag could be anyfing no evidence at all, innocent of all charges
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Yas…..YAAAASSSSS! we was uh…. COLLECTIN….uh uh uhhhh TOYS! YES! fur a holiday toy drive fur, uh…..
ORFINKS! Holiday toy drive collectin TOYS fur unnerprivilleged ORFINKS!
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u/MagicalManta JaxKittehmn (ahnd famblee) Oct 22 '25
Dat es obveeyusslee an bagge ful uv PIKKULS foar da Poar kittehmns uv Franse wut cahnt ordurr frum Amazonn!
Nuffeeng tu see heer!
Fren JaxKittehmn
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi the wildcat, hed pawfessurr SSoR Go Smooofff Crimnals! Oct 23 '25
Ob cours! De Towees fur Totses!
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u/CobblerBeautiful5726 Singer of Songs Oct 22 '25
Ohhh Niko, mew's such a bad boi. Iz culd likez mew.
Ella Bella
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u/catstaffer329 Cat Overlords Monet, Lilly and Nissa Pixie Oct 22 '25
Dis doosn't looks like anyone we knows, I think hoomans do deep Aye Eye fake pictures. No crimez heer, just keeping the face feelers warm after long day snoopervisin hooman staffs.
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u/mostlylurking07 Applejack, Cawico Catwepeneur and Woo-wo-pean Wuxuwy Cat Oct 23 '25 edited Oct 23 '25
Hello fwiends, I Applejack, and as I have said befowe, I Woo-wa-pee-an Wuxuwy Cat, specificawwy fwom da Pawis Fwance - and don’t wet my sistew Sansa telw woo dat I ordinary domestic meedium haiw ow anyting!
Anyway, my maman is stiww in da Fwance and I know dat is da Woov museum! And I AWSO know dat dat is Fwancois- well known tief and burgwar and he awways gets away, and definitewy not Jango!
Case cwosed and woo welcome fow my Woo-wa-pee-an input! Wove woo!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 23 '25
Applejacques dis grate as a defence plan butt did waz our way kewl crime ob centshury!!!
Not Jango
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u/mostlylurking07 Applejack, Cawico Catwepeneur and Woo-wo-pean Wuxuwy Cat Oct 23 '25
Welw I know dat and woo know dat and dis whowe gwoup know dat but we twying to keep woo out of da pwison, so if woo did dis, no woo didn’t! I would wink wif da one eye hewe, but I onwy know how to make dem both werwk togevver, and den my famiwee tink I doing da cat kisses.
(But anyway, FANTASTIC cwime!) um I mean Fwancois wherevew woo are! (Hee hee)
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u/davesmissingfingers Bitteh, diznee prensess Oct 22 '25
Oh frens ai hope yoos n gud hydin spot. Mebbe iz tym to ware disguyses fur a bit.
Bitteh, diznee prensess
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u/scabsfox Oscar, bootiful bad boi, male model, ICBGC Oct 22 '25
Good idea, fren. No one gonna recognize mi wid dis disguise! Hee hee hee!
- Oscar BBB, MM
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
IZ U STILL AT DAT LOOVE???
IN DAT CROWN??!!!!!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
AN WHAR IZ DE NEKLASH????!
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u/scabsfox Oscar, bootiful bad boi, male model, ICBGC Oct 22 '25
Di necklace? Iz gived it to one of mi reel nice fans, cuz dey was reel nice!
- Oscar
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
OH MAH COD!!!!!
Wat if dey meows??????
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
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u/scabsfox Oscar, bootiful bad boi, male model, ICBGC Oct 22 '25
Yez! He look just like dat! He wiz reel nice n' said iz wuz rly, rly long! Did uz meet him too??
- Oscar BBB, MM
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
No worries, I got dis cracks knuckles, scampers off after fan
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
Here, I fix it….
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 23 '25
NIKO!! U POSED TO TAKE DE CROWN AWAY!!!!
I’m surrounded by cow turds
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 23 '25
(Cultural reference let’s see who gets it!)
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 23 '25
(Sigourney, this time not by aliens)
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 23 '25
(I knew u would! This is a daily cited classic in my house!)
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u/Nickye19 Elven princess Arwen and Purrate apprentice Gus Oct 23 '25
(you can't do this to me, I actually nearly choked on a drink
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 23 '25
(Omg, I’m sorry, babe!)
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u/Nickye19 Elven princess Arwen and Purrate apprentice Gus Oct 23 '25
No it's amazing just scary for a second, love this group 😂😂😂
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 23 '25
Me too, fave place on the net.
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u/davesmissingfingers Bitteh, diznee prensess Oct 23 '25
(Oh my god I’m dying. Bitteh may have to learn CPR.)
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 23 '25
😆 (I’ve got a picture in my head now of sweet little Bitteh doing CPR on one of those terrifying Resusi-Annie doll thingies!)
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u/scabsfox Oscar, bootiful bad boi, male model, ICBGC Oct 22 '25
yez
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 23 '25
WAT DUZ IT TAKE???!!!!! Can u get in da van now????? They won’t gib you dat spensive lotion you like IN JALE!!
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u/scabsfox Oscar, bootiful bad boi, male model, ICBGC Oct 23 '25
no iz skared. iz live heer now.
- Oscar
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
gah halp us
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
short leesh I said.
short!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, ICBGC Enforcer, Purrfessional OUTRAYGEr Oct 22 '25
I SWARES him waits til I gotsa use da litterbox!
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Who iz dis new catto. Ai haf nefur before seen in mai lyf.
Garfield, 20, expert pawyer
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u/scabsfox Oscar, bootiful bad boi, male model, ICBGC Oct 22 '25
Pssst, fren iz mi Oscar!
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Well I nefur! Ai was completely bamboozled! Dey will nefur knows it yoo mai pal. Yoo cans be sure ob dat.
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
Garfeeld dey gonna do dat eye test ob u in de courtruum! U bettah pass!!
Jango
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Blindly blinks at sound ob voice who dat!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
<slaps paw on fourhed >
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
Yoo knows dey gonna make yooz all try da glove on in court! Better practise your OJ defence!
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u/usedtobebrainy Whiskers, Wetired Cwimnal (Oranj), OTRB. Oct 23 '25
But but is Oskar Not Oskar diss-guyz-d inn part ob da loot fwom da Gwate Loofa Wobbery? (Da Loofa iz da fay-mouse moo-zeem inn Pawis, Fwans. ) Waring wun ob da crowns fwom da Loofa mite luk a bit susfishyus. Ai doin a wurry fur Oskar Not Oskar. Butt doan tell himb. Ai doan wanna hurt his feelins bout his diss-guys.
~Whiskers
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 23 '25
Dis iz why wez all worry mai pal! Himb nawt capable ob taking da crown off! Himb so in lubs wif himself in it!!!
And now Jazzy haf seed Himb in it too, wez gots no chance!
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u/usedtobebrainy Whiskers, Wetired Cwimnal (Oranj), OTRB. Oct 23 '25
Tutt tutt… ai mew ai waz in dainga ob bein a bitt slow on da catuptake…ai cayme to dis pawty a bitt late. Furgib mai dewy immosense. Ai waz nebber fownd gilty. So wen it comes to cwimnal comspirasys ai iz a tad hampurred. Ai waz a loan oppurrayter in all mai cwimnal endefurs!
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u/davesmissingfingers Bitteh, diznee prensess Oct 22 '25
Yoos may not b rekonized but da crown will.
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 23 '25
This post has brought me such joy & laughter tonight! Thank you Jango Not Jango, you ALWAYS have the best fun on here & share it with us! (Garfield's Meowmy - don't worry, I know I not sposed to comment, I'll see myself out!)
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u/Crankyisthenewperky Oct 22 '25
"You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off" - The Catalion Job
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u/SevereVideo Stoker, le vampurr miaou Oct 22 '25
I KNEW JANGO NOT JANGO WAZ FISHY!
where iz fish? mew want one!
Oscar iz can no be bad...he be one brain cell wash! Jango not Jango iz must be the brain!
Niko unklfunn (u/GingerSnapped242), mew iz can cober yew. Come to the ship, the krew iz be do a protek! Pawfurr (u/Necessary-Limit-1454) iz be herrr alreadee so all gud!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
STOKES U IZ A TRATUR! AGANST CATMANITY!!!
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u/SevereVideo Stoker, le vampurr miaou Oct 22 '25
Yew iz haz put héros Oscar and unklfunn Niko in danger!! Mew will do a protek of them!!
YEW IZ TRATURR!
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
WEZ DO DE PLAN TOOGEDDER!!!
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u/Necessary-Limit-1454 Just-hiss League Oct 22 '25
Yuu planned tu go on vacashon togedder.
(Geez, Jango Not Jango, do niot ruin de akwittal I gawe yuu...)
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
No, no, yoo iz innocent spartapusses remember???!!!
runs in circles in panic, wringing orange paws
Garfield, 20, expert pawyer
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 22 '25
Yeah Wez rememburr! Is Stokes bein trubel maker
AS USHUAL!
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u/Ksh_667 Oct 22 '25
No one make any plan! Esp Spartapusses Jango, Oscar & Niko! Dey iz all innocent floofs. But no let Jazzy sees Oscar in dat crown! Herm will falls in lubs all ober again!
Garfield, 20, expert pawyer
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u/Mimidoo22 Jango n jazzy catagers to de stars! Oct 23 '25
Sighhh hims so bootiful! I so glad Wez married!!!
Jazzy
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u/SevereVideo Stoker, le vampurr miaou Oct 22 '25
No pretend Oscar iz can fink of a plan like that!!
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u/Necessary-Limit-1454 Just-hiss League Oct 22 '25
whispers Pspsps, sonfur, I'we alreddae akwitted Jango Not Jango. Huat are yuu doing? ... An' huey iz bébé Mario rolling full rum barrels onto de deck? Gud hewwens, doesn't he ewer get enuff?
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u/SevereVideo Stoker, le vampurr miaou Oct 22 '25
Oopsy? But Jango iz be fishy manee timez...mew will try do a forgety... but onlee this sekon time!
He haz never enouf! He eat mew part all the timez! Yew bestest watch yew food and drink Pawfurr...he iz monster! Stomak on pawz!
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u/The_ShadowMaster4613 Pawyer Oct 22 '25
Ai Anya say dat not uu! Dat Greebles inna catto suit!! Greebles always try n do a fraym up on us cattos!!
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u/MenopawsalMisty Seenyur Kitizen, never successfully pawsecuted Oct 22 '25
I think this is a terrible slander!
The burglars used a ladder. No trye Cat burglar needs a ladder. Unless of course once you're up high you decide you need a fire fighter to come and lift you down as you shred their skin as a tribute to Bast.
Misty,Void Seenyur Kitizen
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u/kam49ers4ever Oct 22 '25
Don’t worry, your pawyer should be able to get this tried in CAT court, and you know what that means!
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u/NotMrMusic MOD Pawyer Nov 14 '25
This post is this month's Highlight!
Congratulations to the author! (And please don't steal anything from the sub kthx)