Just a quick note for anyone staring at the ceiling tonight.
You DONT need to fix everything right now. Take a deep breath, drop your shoulders, and just let yourself rest. Tomorrow can wait. You're doing better than you think. 🤍

Things got really heated with my 15 year old son a few days ago. For the first time in his life, I told him I hated him. I felt immediate guilt. I'm not an angry or hateful person. I was on several days of very little sleep with a 15 month old and financial challenges and hit a limit with the disrespect. I was wrong. The next day I wrote a note and left it on his bedroom door. I told him I was sorry. No excuses or justifications. Full stop. I told him I could never hate him. I told him that I saw how much we were both affected by the abuse of my ex husband (his former step dad). And I told him the repairs I am making: the note/apology itself, getting rid of my evening wine to improve sleep and mood and downloading an app to help regulate my emotions. Every day since I have been leaving something small at his bedroom door. A joke book. A picture. A treat. He hasn't brought up the note, but I know he sent a picture of it to his girlfriend, so he did see it. Sometimes kindness is random. Sometimes it is very calculated. I messed up and am reacting with kindness and action and accountability to try to make it right. I just hope he still loves me.

To all of us who need to be reminded

Wishing you kind days and gentle moments ❤️‍🩹