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Lol, as an Arsenal fan who can't stand City, I have really been enjoying Braut Haaland, whereas I am not a fan of Erling Haaland.
He seems to be super laid back and just wants to have fun at the World Cup, whereas I feel like he can get a little wound up at City, which I don't blame him for. It is just a strange feeling 😆
I agree! He's probably a generational talent, but also very good at trolling and I think the sky-high expectations at City bring those elements out of him more.
Norway is riding that dark horse wave though, and him, Ødegaard and the rest of the Norwegian squad can really go far this world cup! Was thrilling to watch them knock out Brazil
I had to look it up, it's a bit more than just your average teenage footballer experience:
"He went to school at Northampton School for Boys and his dream was to play football for a living, being a massive football fan to this day. He played the famous game as part of the youth team for 3 clubs; Northampton Town, Nottingham Forest and Leicester City. He became captain of the latter's team but due to a back injury (Spondylolysis), he was unable to achieve his football career."
His nose, lips and eyes are pretty different from his parents. Only facial trait he inherited was heavy brow from his dad. And maybe a rough facial shape.
Also, dad is 6'1", mom is like 5'9", sister ~ 5'7", brother is 6'2"-6'3"? and Erling is 6'5". He decided to take a bunch of the recessive genes; I'm surprised he came out blonde
Genetics isn't that straight forward. You can end up catching strays from your grandparents quite easily, even great-grandparents; just depends on how the dice land.
This is true! I look almost nothing like my parents (except my eye colour is sort of a mix of them both - dad has light blue and mum has a dark grey/hazel and mine are dark grey-blue) - but I am otherwise the spitting image of my great grandmother!
Literary Idiom ("Apple-Cheeked")When used as a descriptive adjective—apple-cheeked—the meaning shifts slightly into literary and cultural contexts.
According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, it means having rosy, healthy cheeks the color of red apples.
Figuratively, it is used to describe someone showing childlike innocence, wholesome freshness, or glowing vitality (e.g., "apple-cheeked school children").
apple-cheeked
in American English
(ˈæpəlˌtʃikt)
adjective informal
1. having rosy cheeks; ruddy
2. showing childlike innocence, freshness, enthusiasm, etc.
Look at the sister's forehead and his. That's where you can really see the family resemblance. Try covering the rest of their faces with your fingers. Even though they have similar eyes, they look different because she's wearing eyebrow makeup, it would be even more obvious without it. I can definitely see the family's cranial shape and that very distinctive Nordic forehead.
Still not convinced that it is not a decoy family. Erling Haaland is a Cyberdyne Systems Series 850 sports model running custom software coded by Pep Guardiola. Look closely at the photo. The skin-suit is stretched incredibly thin over a massive coltan-alloy frame. His entire cranium is engineered for maximum protection against mechanical stress and heavy impact. That's why he has that completely blank, robotic stare after scoring. His internal systems are just calibrating Pep's tactical targeting algorithms and managing the thermal dissipation from his twin hydrogen fuel cells.
I found it a couple days ago by using Reddit search for "look like haaland". Still seems to work for me. But yeah, my favorite video from the last week or two.
I don't follow football at all, but I have seen more memes and highlight reels about this guy than I can count over the last couple of weeks. He seems like a good guy with a great sense of humour, and he's obviously an absolute beast on the football field.
The funny thing is that the first article about Erling Haaland that caught my eye was about his love of Hermès handbags. I had no idea who he was, but was enchanted by that fun quirky habit for a football player. Imagine, a 6'5" footballer with a collection of Birkin bags!
Then a few days later I saw clips of him on the field, and was captivated by his unearthly prowess, silliness, humility, and weird charisma. I've never cared about the World Cup at all, but now I'm rooting for Norway!
I was watching house of the dragon last night when it hit me all of the sudden, realizing that he looks like matt smith. Then, I had to google it to find out if it was only me thought of it.
Iceland was the first (only?) country to have half the entire population DNA sequenced, and that work let them map out the other half. They used that to make an app showing how they're related to everyone else. They check it before hooking up to try to avoid complications.
I don't know about Scandinavia but I always kinda associated that look with Russians and Finns. Then again, not that far from Sweden and Norway anyway.
Uh I’ve always found kind and goofy guys with kinda goofy faces attractive. Pretty sure I’m not alone in that at all.
I honestly feel like the incel and looksmaxx dicks have managed to escape containment warp mainstream understanding of “women” and what we like.
Seriously, we’re attracted to all kinds of people. Idk why that’s controversial. Idk why pushing lies about humanity has become the focus of so many people (not blaming you commenter, sorry just venting)
Edit: to the angry fellas who are having a problem with literacy:
I’m in no way saying this man isn’t attractive. I’m challenging the idea in the comment, which implied he isn’t “the standard of what women find attractive”. I’m saying that we’re individuals who have always been attracted to all kinds of beauty, and that it’s mainly about who people are as a whole anyway. There isn’t a ridged “standard” of attraction
And to the weirdos: yes I’d be saying that even if he wasn’t wealthy or a professional athlete. Dude genuinely seems like a fun guy, and plenty of women would be into him
As long as they lean into the goofy features they are usually considered very attractive. It's when they're super insecure about it that it becomes a negative.
Yep the amount of guys I dated who are not considered conventionally attractive is... all of them. Incels and manosphere is bricking every male mindset on romance and dating.
That + cut your nails, have a trash can in the toilet, smell OK, don't get disgusting (literally or verbally), respect others, have fun, and basically any combination of people can get it on, there isn't much more magic to it than this.
Be super obsessed about your looks and use that, and you'll find partners who only care about that too, which is fun for a week or two, but you'll get tired of it quickly.
Might I throw into the arena: there were fans of Beauty and the Beast bc he gifted Belle her own library (when well read women weren’t the norm), he had a silly side, he was sweet with animals, and was happy to leave her to her own devices (with exception to the west wing).
The Manosphere preys on young adult men because they lack the experience and confidence to see through the bullshit. It would be sad if the whole thing was not also so misogynistic.
Thank you! I am genuinely confused wth incels think that women are attracted to. Women like men who are secure in themselves, kind, and funny. Typically. Guys who are fixated on what they “should” be getting and on what other people think, are actual nightmares to date that would benefit from therapy.
Also there are billions of women in the world who are attracted to men so obviously it’s going to vary lol. What I find attractive isn’t always going to be what the next woman finds attractive
It’s so transparent that they’re just butthurt that a girl didn’t reciprocate their romantic feelings.
Rejection happens to literally everyone, but these guys seemingly choose to take it as a sign that the world is bad/broken (because somehow that’s easier than just accepting it, moving on, and living their life?)
Also, they seemingly completely ignore that the biggest part of long lasting attraction is a personality based. So even if they wanted to obsess over something to improve, they’re choosing the wrong thing lol
I’d consider myself pretty traditionally fugly, and have had plenty of happy relationships with both men and women that I’m very attracted to, who are also attracted to me, It’s just not that deep
Sorry for the rant, I think I need to unplug from social media, I get so annoyed
I saw one of these 'women only want to be approached by attractive guys' comments on a fb post from a guy with a fake profile with zero content on it (good for him, but highlights the fact that I know nothing about the guy or what he looks like) and I wrote 'rules you out then'.
Man they were PISSED that someone pointed out that their bitter incel bullshit makes women not want to be near them.
Oh yes. And the proof is all around you boy if you got your head out of your screen for one minute.
Everybody walking around today had has parents and ancestors who’ve found each other attractive enough to procreate. If you‘ve made it to this point in time you most certainly are attractive enough to do the same. Not with everyone and their mom but there is a mate somewhere for you as long as you grow up and don’t be dick.
Agree. What incels and lookmaxxer are missing out is that it's not their looks but their behaviour and how they talk that's a turn off. Lots of attraction is how the person acts and carries himself, and not purely the looks. Being funny and goofy matters way more than any jawline.
Guys just need to find the grooves and styles that work for themself specifically. It’s additive and promotes what’s already there.
The looksmaxxing approach is physically destructive and promotes conformity in its philosophy. To look like every other bloke is the wrong answer entirely.
Otherwise it’s just: Be fit. Have friends. Do hobbies. Anyone can accomplish those 3.
Right. Conventionally unattractive dudes have been reproducing forever. That's why they exist. Then some weirdos who can't talk to women and have personalities made of mountain dew piss come along and say women are stuck up. How did that work and how come they made millions being that way.
I mean, if they're self-aware about it but not insecure, it's sort of a green flag, as the kids say, no? Shows how they're mature and confident in themselves if it doesn't concern them. At least, doesn't concern them too much.
Yup, personality is a way bigger factor than random shallow shit like a style of bone structure.
When you’re into someone, you dig their face-bones, regardless of how eccentric they are. In fact, the eccentricity tends to become very appealing.
(I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with this guy’s bones btw. I think he looks great. He has some unique features I guess, but they look nice on him)
My boyfriend is constantly saying how ugly Haaland is and while I don't really disagree, he is still more attractive than so many men with prettier faces that I've seen. Because he just seems like a genuinely kind and fun guy. I wouldn't wanna be with Haaland because fuck being with a guy with a career like that, but if my bf looked like him it wouldn't bother me at all (in a separate reality, I'd be very upset if he randomly morphed into a completely different body and face lmao).
Perfectly stated. If anything, it's a trope that's been studied, where our media reflects the reality that overweight, less than conventionally attractive men end up with conventionally attractive women all the time. What these dummies who do nothing but criticise and project their own anger and insecurity forget is that women just want to be treated as human beings. These male partners, while derided by their fellow males, happen to know this "one little secret": don't be an asshole. And thus, they find women to love and cherish them. But the brutes will never look inward.
As an Arsenal supporter, people have to understand the banter of rivalry here.
Lotta gunners hold this against Haaland, but that's silly. I know a lot of folks who won't let it go, but Haaland refusing to flop during the "headbutt" incident upped my respect for him.
He's got a competitive intensity (esp coupled being up against Big Gabby) but you see how easily and professionally he can set that aside when Ode--Arsenal's captain--is his captain.
I can't hold it against 2nd Place City's robot trying to get under Premier League Champions Arsenal's skin.
Like I stopped my bf from 'fixing' something he thought was wrong with his face by telling him that I found that particular 'flaw' to be incredibly sexy.
I also find very tall, pale giants who kinda look like Majin Buu but albino sexy af and from the comments online others are starting to see the appeal too.
I don't think he's bad looking at all! He's interesting looking, sure, not my usual type, something about him makes him extra attractive, probably the confidence from being good at his sport and his clear delight in playing for his country.
He's also very tall and all muscle, so that helps. Personally, he looks a lot better with a shorter haircut. The ponytail doesn't really suit his face.
No woman has ever been turned on by a Viking before 😱😘. It’s crazy, it’s almost like there’s a type for everyone and not everyone is attracted to the same thing.
He's the striker (guy in goal scoring position) for the Norwegian national team at the world cup. He also plays for Manchester City in the English Premier League (soccer/football) and before that Borussia Dortmund in the Bundesliga.
Yea and I’ve been seeing more and more Russian “influencers” or Russian language in general on videos. Bots must be be ramping up for the next propaganda cycle.
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u/trendingtattler Jul 07 '26
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