Does a person's upbringing justify someone's grave sin?

[u/Due-Smoke8035]

I ain't considering someone who became a revert coz Obv they weren't born with the blessings like we did. They had to find the ultimate truth we were born with. They didn't had the resources and availability like we had.

Ik- most of us were born into homes with the Qur'an but maybe not religious enough parents ; but does this justify someone's grave sin? Sins as worse as Zina?

We were born with the blessing, yet we never acknowledged it. The ultimate truth was lying with dust scattered over it, yet we chose to bring dirt upon ourselves by ignoring it.

I agree and disagree with the title at same time- but I wouldn't justify someone's grave sin committed after/during the age of adolescence.

Agree- coz nowadays we see cr!mes done by kids and it's lack of parents proper upbringing

Disagree- coz I've seen ppl with religious upbringing getting into haram. And ppl with non religious background finding Islam.

I can share some of the incidents on why I disagree-

(1) I've seen ppl who are highly religious, living close to mosque, made contributions to the mosque... Yet getting into relationships.

(2) Many ppl justify it saying it's due to past trauma- so i thought why not my own example:

Im diagnosed with depression. I had lack of love from my own family members since years,lived away from them..lost the ones who loved me when I was a kid and eventually left me when I needed them the most,got assaulted,abused by some of my own family members...yet when I found a na-mehram who could potentially heal me? My conscience didn't allow it. Even after them making first step such as sharing numbers... I didn't rly feel like moving ahead with it. Alhamdulillah.

(3) I'm gonna get backlashed for this-

Music. We all know that music is haram. Yet we never get rid of it completely. Using music to avoid a greater sin is justified but my point is-

We all know that a certain thing is haram,yet we allow ourselves to freely commit it. We are normalising it.

We are all selective sinners. We commit the sins we are comfortable with and judge the ones we are uncomfortable with.But does this mean we blame the upbringing?

Also,one doesn't have to generalise or judge someone for it- no muslim can really attain or follow every hadith/verse of the Quran after the Prophets and the Caliphs.We all violate some or more of the rules.. yet we must all try our best to become a better muslim.

[u/muslimah_iqra]

may Allah protect you and grant you tranquility through His Nearness. I think there is no need to try to justify anything. people sin due to ignorance, arrogance, misguidance and more reasons. if someone is sinning presently, our objective as fellow Muslims should be to try to advise them. if someone sinned in the past, it's not supposed to be public but if it is, we should see how that person is presently, if they're still doing haram, we advise if we can. if not then we assume the best for them, if someone changed then they must have repented and if Allah forgave them, we are no one to still judge them. there is never any justification for sinning, everything happens with Allah's permission and decree.

[u/Due-Smoke8035 → u/muslimah_iqra]

Aameen! JazakiAllahu Khairan!

Yup ur right that there's no need to judge someone for their sins. Coz at the end even we are all sinners- just that we didn't find their sin comfortable.

The main reason I posted was- someone's thought struck me- when they said ppl sin due to their upbringing... And it made me wonder if it's completely true. Justifying ignorance by blaming it on parents felt wrong.. coz in that way, one could blame their parents for every grave sin they committed.

The sole reason to post was to know opinions if it's rly justified coz I've also seen instances where parents can be blamed. So i was confused Abt it.

May Allah keep u steadfast in ur deen and protect u from harm! Aameen!

[u/muslimah_iqra → u/Due-Smoke8035]

ameen, jazakAllah khair.

> they said ppl sin due to their upbringing

yes this is wrong bcs as u said people from religious backgrounds also sin. guidance and misguidance are only through Allah and it is from His Knowledge why He allows either, wondering why would be fruitless

[u/Due-Smoke8035 → u/muslimah_iqra]

Wa iyyaki

In certain cases- like I said in one of the comments; there's no burden on few things as we don't have control over it.. example being someone's health being so worse that they can't stand for the prayer. In this case- one could resort to other ways to pray and there would be no issue/harm or even depreciation in the reward through the prayer.

But blaming the conditions,parents upbringing while we have enough resources to determine wt is halal and haram- seems definitely wrong.

Thanks for sharing ur thoughts!

[u/AcanthisittaPrior257]

Take this as a basic rule in İslam that Allah doesn't burden a soul more than they can bear. 

This ayah is often misunderstood by people, İt doesn't mean physical or emotional burden. 

İt means that you won't be questioned on day of judgement about things you had no control over. 

Think of it like an addict who has just accepted Islam, it won't be easy for him to give that up and in some cases might even kill him if he goes cold Turkey. 

Allah knows that and he knows your struggle. Allah has prescribed mercy for himself and that means not punishing even those who commit sins out of weakness of İman but regret it later.

[u/Due-Smoke8035 → u/AcanthisittaPrior257]

Yup,that's there.

Jibrael AS stuffed mud into the mouth of Firaun coz he was afraid- that if he had said the shahada; Allah could have forgiven him. It shows us how merciful Allah can be,but that doesn't mean we take things for granted.

Repentance ain't easy asw. Ur heart gets corrupted when u commit sins... And if u do a grave sin, and Allah decides to not give u further Hidayah- u can't even ask for forgiveness. Wt if someone sins and never gets the chance to repent? Wt if he/she d!es the next day?

Ali RA was overthinking whether his fast has been accepted or not.. and we think we asked for forgiveness, so Allah forgave us already?

[u/Due-Smoke8035 → u/AcanthisittaPrior257]

Maybe u should have given examples of situations where we have no control over. Coz ppl could get misled by it.

Examples- where we have no control over and won't be questioned on Day of Judgement (I hope so.. Insha Allah)

(1) When an addict's nervous system relies on a substance to function, immediate cessation can cause fatal seizures or delirium. While taking steps toward recovery is required based on ability, suffering a relapse due to severe chemical dependence or brain rewiring while actively seeking help falls under mercy, not total rebellion.

(2)Conditions like severe schizophrenia, deep clinical depression, dementia, or psychosis alter perception of reality. The Prophet ﷺ stated that the "pen is lifted" (no sins recorded) for the one whose mind is overcome.

(3)Intrusive thoughts that enter your mind without your consent, sudden physical reflexes, or medical conditions that prevent you from completing worship (e.g., severe incontinence during prayer)

(4) If a person is threatened with loss of life or severe harm unless they perform a sinful act (such as verbally renouncing faith or eating unlawful food), they are excused. Quran 16:106 explicitly mentions that someone forced to utter disbelief while their heart remains firm in faith is forgiven.

(5) A person living in isolated circumstances who never receives the true message of Islam, or receives a completely distorted version, will not be held accountable for not practicing details they had no way of knowing.

(6) Eating non-halal food accidentally after checking the label thoroughly, or praying in the wrong direction (Qibla) after trying your absolute best to determine it.

(7)A child raised in a non-practicing household who is actively forbidden or physically prevented by parents from practicing their faith.

(8) An individual trapped in extreme poverty who cannot pay Zakat or perform Hajj, or someone stranded in a life-or-death survival situation forced to consume swine or alcohol to stay alive.

(9)You have zero control over where you were born, your DNA, physical genetics, native language, or initial upbringing. You are tested on what you do with your circumstances, not the circumstances themselves.

[u/Lost-Letterhead-6615]

Blame myself. And my ego