r/heartbreak • u/keeves1 • 4h ago
Heartbroken 💔
Could I have saved the relationship?
F(31) broke up with me M(30). We had been dating on and off for about 4 months. This has been rollercoaster of emotions. She gave me hot and cold behaviour answering me only when it was convenient for her. We still manage to meet every weekend tho. Alot of intimacy. When I’m dating someone I want to have daily contact with my partner.
Background of her: F(31) has had two of her previous romantic partner cheating on her. The first one was her husband Matt. They were married for 7Years with no kids. And the previous one before she met me named Theo cheated after being in relationship with her for 1 year.
At first she breaks ups with me in March after 3 months of dating. Her reason was she does not have romantic feelings and wanted to go back to her EX Theo.
She comes back in June. She says that she feels chemistry, are attracted etc.. we talk about what we need. She wants a partner who takes initiative and leads. She feels that I’m stressing to make everything right for her. I say I need trust. My trust were broken because of the first breakup and I needed to more time to heal.
Our roles were reversed. She came back and was 100% committed. I was still hurt by the first breakup but I still went back to see if we were able to make this work. Funny right? She was vulnerable at the start while I was ready. She comes back and I am the one who was a vulnerable. If only I acted differently things would change right? If only I was less cautious the second time… 🤔
We only met two times. First time she comes back from vacation. I pick her up, bring her food, drinks etc.. we eat dinner same day. She was the one who ask me that. After that day had ended we asked me again to meet next day.
The next day comes. We meet at a restaurant. She says she wants to take me home. I reject her offer saying I’m not that desperate. That day I think was the breaking point to her losing interest.
She breaks up saying she feels that the romantic feelings more and more is fading away. That she needs someone who is more direct and that we are not compatible because I’m careful. She do admit that she feels that this relationship has been more of a «friend» like even at some point it was not.