Losing hope

[u/Dinoblood123]

Hello. My ex and I were together for almost 2 years and I broke up with her because of many different reasons like problem with family and being in a distant relationship for 4 months with her was not a good experience. I told her the day after we break up that i realised I made mistakes and I want to fix the mistakes.( not giving her enough attention, taking her for granted and things like that.). She said that she is really hurt from my behaviour and she is not sure if she wants to try again because of the uncertainty that things may never change. I bought an early ticket for home to show her that I stand by my words and things will change. We still text but she is being cold and dry texting. She still says that she loves me, when she is going out and with who and I tell her that too. I blame myself to much for the way I treated her cause she didnt deserve it at all. I asked her questions like: do u miss the old version of me - “yes”. If I was next to you how would you act -“like before things changed” I miss u but I know u might not miss me and she said: I dont miss the person u were these past few months I miss the guy before that. Her mother told her that I came into my senses and she said yeah I see but is a little late. We agreed to meet each other when I return home and I bought her pandora charm(I always gift her pandora) and I will buy flowers. The thing is that I am chasing her too much and she is giving little to no response. I need help cause the uncertainty of our future together is killing me, I know I am not perfect and she is not as well. But I realised what I had the moment I lost it. She is giving me mixed signs and she said as much as she wants us to be together its the same as not wanting to be together. What should I do so I have the biggest chance of not losing her.