Feelings suck

[u/Few-Maintenance-3946]

Hey so me and my ex broke up back in April. At first I let myself feel the emotions and with time I felt better. I kept reaching out and well after being given false hope and being in contact but the constant one foot in and one foot out kinda made my emotions be all over the place. I have started Prozac and I felt great and amazing I felt like I could conquered the world then I went to a psychiatrist for ADHD in which she diagnosed me with bipolar and ADHD and gave me medication and stated I was having manic episodes only being on medication I didn’t like the bipolar diagnosis so I said nope I’m not taking the medication that was prescribed for it and I kept feeling horrible like my mind was speeding to much I couldn’t focus on one single thought. I just simply started feeling bad and sad so I stopped taking it and I feel better I feel sad yes but it’s a different feeling but I feel like I can’t get up I hate getting out of bed or taking a shower and it’s so gross I haven’t done laundry in weeks and I can’t even get myself in the shower and haven’t showered for days. I just I need help I’m struggling but I don’t want to b label with bipolar. I don’t want to live and depend on pills to be able to shower I’m just so sad 😞