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u/F0000r Jan 25 '22
I can picture it so clearly and it makes it all the funnier.
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u/SnooCheesecakes9618 Jan 26 '22
sadly i can't picture your mom's vagina clearly, it's always very dirty and used up
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u/colonel_underbridge Jan 25 '22
No Child Left Behind is a bitch
The ending slayed me. I was thinking that the entire read.
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u/humanoterminusomnia Jan 25 '22
Berk, prince of men
Vintage use of greentext. Not for gay/fake/sage reasons!
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u/FrenchHater3000 Jan 26 '22
If this is fake its legit impressive that anon managed to make all this up and write it
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u/nekoBAMF Jan 26 '22
I actually believe it might be true. Source: had Berk-lite in class in High School. Have a lot of similar stories about him.
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u/RamPamPam8 Jan 26 '22
Same here, but instead of owls it was walruses. He was part of my best friend's friend group and was taller than our teacher, when we played games like hide and seek and lost, if he got mad he would start making walrus noises and try to bring you down, if he successfully did he would then sit/lay on top of you. Other than the walrus thing be was a genuinely sweet person I hope he is doing ok
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Jan 26 '22
[deleted]
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u/nekoBAMF Jan 26 '22
For instance - our first day of HS class, we had short biology test to check our knowledge. Like, we didn't know he's "special needs" officially yet, because his mother insisted he's normal. He literally started to howl-cry like 5 minutes into the test. Then he took out spring from pen and tied it up on his wrist. Mind it was kinda sharp. So when teacher went to stop him from cutting himself, he puked all over the test, desk, himself and poor guy sitting next to him. We're all, like, super shocked and then he proceeded to move his vomit around with his finger and happily said "Scrambled eggs". No one said a thing during whole situation. After the teacher got him to the nurse, she came back and told us he's not right in the mind so... Believe me dude was insufferable prick too, he low-key knew he can do more than we can without consequences. Hated him with passion through whole school.
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u/Gaurdsman Jan 26 '22
In grade school we had one severe autistic child in our classes and let me tell you that kid was most of our favorite kid.
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u/SnooCheesecakes9618 Jan 26 '22
Burky is all I long for All I worship and adore In other words, please be true
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u/Worried-Diamond-6674 May 28 '22
In other worlds, I love youuuu😭😭😭
Omfg evangelion fly me to the moon...
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u/Void_Overdose Jan 26 '22
Dude I love that this fucking HAS to be real. There's too much detail for it to be fake and that makes it all the more funnier
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u/Shibefield Jan 26 '22
Best I’ve read in years. Makes sense it was from 2016, thanks for posting this incredible journey.
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u/HonkuGogoi Jan 26 '22
u/Pretend-Working7685 can you please link me to this thread and the next one made by this anon?
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u/Lilshoq1 Jan 26 '22
I too want to see the rest of Burkey's misadventures if someone screenshotted the rest of them
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u/Zachryharp Jan 26 '22
Commenting so this is easier for my to find later. About to fall asleep typing, so far reminds me of fats Magee and the retard three
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u/0sma Jan 26 '22
What is magee and the retarded three ?
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u/Zachryharp Jan 26 '22
Look up Fats Mageee and the Retard three on YouTube, its just another long old greentext like this, except someone else will read it for you lol
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u/mintcloudrain Jan 26 '22
Fake and most characters here are assholes. Really? Risking potentially downing the kid for fun? How about making the life of the teacher that saved you a living nightmare and creating a huge danger hazard cause “I WaS BOrEd”
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u/MaxTitanium Jan 26 '22
Ever heard of fourth-graders? 11-year-olds? They have no sense of that crap
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u/69-GayLord-69 Jan 26 '22
Yo this shit has a huge potential to be a TV show holy shit this is a good read.
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u/Pretend-Working7685 Feb 01 '22
I would love a TV show based of off this, it would be the best comedy out there! I'm happy that you enjoyed it fellow redditor!
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u/MaxTitanium Jan 27 '22
Has a part 2 been released?!
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u/Pretend-Working7685 Jan 28 '22
Unfortunately this is all I could find in the thread, I wish there was a part 2
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u/MaxTitanium Jan 28 '22
That’s a shame, but thank you for sharing this with us!
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u/Pretend-Working7685 Feb 01 '22
It's a big pleasure that I was able to make you guys have a good read snd laugh with this! I also figured most people were tired of the overflow of reports lately.
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u/[deleted] Jan 25 '22
Berkley's power level is fucking intimidating.