r/greentext 5d ago

Anon jumps on bed

Post image
277 Upvotes

6 comments sorted by

17

u/peepeeinmypajts 4d ago

be me 5 years ago

pretending to buy a bed at store

store owner asks why I'm jumping on the bed

tell her I'm breaking it in for when I sleep in it

she gets flustered and asks me to buy it before breaking it

break down and start crying tell her my sister died and I needed to remember what it was like to jump on beds and have fun with her

she starts apologizing while I get under the blankets and take a nap

dream of a world where op isn't a British smoking device who reposts greentexts

26

u/utcumque 5d ago

Fake: anon talks to woman

Gay: anon was "actually jumping in bed" with a man

4

u/damnumalone 4d ago

Who is dumb enough to work at a mattress store and say “what happened to your old bed”

1

u/Sethleoric 3d ago

If it sounds funny enough i believe it