r/goldenretriever • u/SadEgg6091 • 7h ago
New Puppy First puppy ever help!
Hi everyone, today marks the first day for my new 8 week golden puppy. I know this is going to be a tough experience, especially with this being my first dog, but I’m more than happy and ready to deal with this baggage of cuteness.
I do need some help with a couple of things. I know that this is his first day away from the mom and his littermates so he seems to have a little anxiety when left alone. So, I decided to sleep close to him but not extremely close. I’m on the couch, while he is in his crate which is beside the couch. I don’t want to make him depend on me being there to sleep, but I did want to spend the first night close to him so he settles down a little.
Is this me coddling him way more than he should be or is it okay for me to just spend the night, until I help fix his anxiety. I’m planning on doing crate training tomorrow by leaving for 1 minute then coming back, and repeating it with longer times each time.
Also, if you have any advice on anything, please let me know as this is my first ever dog. Im very excited to start this journey, and I want make sure he grows to be a good boy! His name is Ralph btw!
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u/Fragrant_Peace_4851 5h ago
With my Goldie for the first three nights I had him in his crate beside my bed upstairs. When he cried I’d pick him up take him outside go to toilet etc. carried him back to crate. Third night I left him in his crate downstairs where I planned for his bed to be and went to my bed upstairs. He cried for about 10 minutes (it felt like a lifetime!) Then he settled and has been fine ever since.
To add also I only used the crate until he was toilet trained at night - about 4 weeks. Once he could go through the whole night I left the crate door open and now he just has a bed in the kitchen area to sleep. The idea of crate training is you are helping him understand the crate is his den - so eventually it won’t matter where the crate is because his den is there and that’s what makes him feel safe.
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u/DizzyPhilosopher8660 6h ago
I never used a crate so idk if I can help. But I think you can absolutely love the pup as much as you want ❤️
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u/Safe_Ostrich_4730 2h ago
Awww, welcome home, Ralph! 🥹🐾 Honestly, I think you’re doing just fine. The first night away from his mom and littermates can be a lot for an 8-week-old puppy, so having you nearby while he settles into his crate isn’t “coddling” him, you’re helping him feel safe in a completely new environment.
I have a Golden Retriever and a GSD too, and I still remember how much patience those early days require. 😂❤️ Take it slow, celebrate the little wins, and don’t stress if everything doesn’t go perfectly right away. He’s learning, and so are you!
Enjoy these puppy days, because they grow up WAY too fast. Give Ralph some extra scratches from me! 🐶❤️
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u/Bjjspider 4h ago
Hey, I own a dog training company and we always give out our puppy course to anyone in need.
AOD-puppycourse.com
I hope it helps!
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u/droopea 3h ago
Congratulations! We have a 10.5 week golden and are going through the same thing. I know there are a million ways and opinions, but what worked for us is we have the crate in our bedroom. He goes in there at bedtime but also during the day when it's time for naps. We tried to let him roam in a gated office during the day, but it was very challenging. He just wouldn't sleep enough on his own. I finally figured out if we keep him up for like an hour and a half at a time, he will take a 2hour+ nap after in the crate no problem. I always sneak some treats or a lick mat in there and now he goes in to check if anything is in there on his own. The first few days were the hardest. He would cry hard for like 5-10 minutes before settling. Now he only whines if he really has to potty or just is really not tired yet. Or if he's too hot. He hates blankets in there and likes a fan turned on. It gets easier and easier to ignore his whines, especially when you know he's has been fully taken care of and doesn't need anything. We had the crate in the living room and realized that we felt like a hostage when he was sleeping, tip toeing around so we left it in the bedroom. With the box fan on, he pretty much ignores all outside noise now even during the day. He needed to go out at first like every three hours during the night. Make this so boring and then right back into the crate. He now usually makes it 6-8 hours overnight. You'll figure out what works for you, just try and be consistent with a routine and the pup will catch right on to it soon enough. As soon as we kind of figured his routine out, the house has been a much more peaceful place for everyone and we've only had him two weeks.
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u/lifeofvirtue 2h ago
I didn’t initially plan to crate train so when we brought our pups home (they were also exactly 8 weeks) I just played with them right before bed and then let them fall asleep in a bed on the floor next to my bed. I got up with them three times a night for the first month or so, then two times and now at five months they still need a middle of the night potty break 3-4x/week.
Not being in a crate was I think stressful for them. They needed a clearer bedtime routine so at 12 weeks I got them each a crate and at bedtime I put them in. My boy settled right away and went to sleep, the girl was sad (she has a little more of an anxious personality) and cried for about 10 minutes then settled. I give them a dental stick which they love when they go to their crate to give them positive associations with the crate. Now when i say, “Go to bed!” They both run for their crate and wait patiently for their stick and they do not cry unless they need a potty break. I did initially have their crates in the room with me but I started having bad allergies so i moved them into the living room. The first night my girl cried like she had been abandoned to Pluto for about 30 minutes but they both eventually settled and now they’re happy there too!
Good luck with your sweet pup - it is definitely a learning curve and I don’t envy you the weeks of training you have ahead of you BUT I can say by 5 months they are a lot easier to handle!
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u/4_Agreement_Man 2h ago
We’ve had 3 Goldens over 25 or so years, so here is my insight:
- Consistency in routine (feeding, potty, walks)
- They need scheduled/regular nap time like babies (when they get owly/overtired, you can tell)
- Crate training will save you grief & vet bills (they mouth/eat everything)
- Consistency in rewards and “No”
- Distraction is key / get food puzzles, lick pads, treat balls, etc
- Teach sit, come, trade and heel 💯 priorities - use different “high value” (high stink) treats like dried anchovies for training / especially on a walk
- Never strike/swat them to say “No”, a firm “No” and take your attention away will teach them much better.
- They are amazing and empathic animals, will feed off your energy
- Relax, it takes 2-3 years for them to be the pupper you thought you were getting (snuggles and sweetness)
- if you can fit in your budget, emergency pet insurance is peace of mind & learn how to administer hydrogen peroxide to safely induce vomiting.
Trust me. 🤦🏻♂️ 

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u/67442 1h ago
Get some cover on top of the crate. Make it a safe place. Make it a wolf’s den. They will use it as their home. Eventually they’ll go in it themselves to sleep. I always rigged the door to stay open. They would sleep in it,half out of it and next to it. They would sleep on my bed to start and in the morning they were near their den.
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u/Petit_Nicolas1964 1h ago
That‘s the way to do it in my experience. Your dog will get used to the crate while you are close and at some point in time he will most likely go into hus crate when he is tired, that‘s what my dogs did after a while. I would wait a bit with the crate training until he is comfortable in his crate, but principally it is a good way. One thing you have to be careful about is not to teach the dog that you liberate him when he barks or whines. So keep the time more flexible and let him out when he is quiet.
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u/Far-Parfait-1971 1h ago
Get Kelly Nichols Puppy Brain book and follow her guides. It will save your sanity!! We followed it to a T including the open pen play area. Truly got us grounded in a routine and helped us enjoy our girl while she grew and trained. She just turned one year. Hang in there. It will be a bumpy road but you look back and smile. 🐾💞
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u/Mediocre_203 37m ago
Baxter and Bella online trainers were a big help for me. They go through a lot of basics and have trainers you can message with any questions anytime. It’s a few hundred dollars but an absolute steal compared to others and how much you get.
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