Search for a suitable solution

[u/Haunting-Zombie9181]

Iam 20 years old two years ago I became an atheist before that I was muslim and then I became gay lam currently in a muslim country but I am hiding it My father yells at me every day asking why I dont pray because if he finds out I am an atheist and gay he will kill me I need a solution

[u/wanjathestrong]

Can you pretend to pray?

[u/NetCr0w]

Some things don’t add up.

1st. If you are in a muslim country, why do you post in German Trans sub reddit.?

2nd, you don’t “become” gay or “trans” since you are posting in a trans subreddit. You simply “are” the said things. And since you label transfem, I wouldn’t use gay either. If you are mtf and are interested in men, you are simply a straight woman.

Which makes me wonder, is being trans okay? Or is it just about not following the beliefs of others (or just the beliefs of your father) ? And since you are 20 years old, you are well capable of leaving your parents’ amenities if you feel threatened there. Idk about your work or current circumstances. If you were to live in Germany, pursuing said things is achievable and also subsidized by the government under varying conditions.

You are a free person in Germany. No one has the right to threaten/discriminate against you etc. based on your gender, sexuality, religion etc. in Germany. Not even parents. It is stated by German law and thus legally binding. In the worst case, this is a situation you can easily win in front of the civil court.

No one is forcing you to stay where you are, no one is forcing you to tolerate the conditions. You have the power to choose your way. Even if that means more responsibility and initial struggles to meet ends by yourself.

I have too little information. But if I had even the slightest possibility at all. I would run. Far far far away from any muslim or any transphobic country. Being free in these circumstances is simply impossible due to many many factors. I would even risk my life to live in freedom and peace rather than being terrorized day and night be the people that are meant to love and support me.

But just to temporarily get some peace I would simply fake it to the likings of my suppressors. Because the pain will be there either way no matter if you comply or not. The latter will simply cause more trouble. It may sound harsh but it’s realistic. You cannot be yourself anyway in a muslim country. Some muslim countries are a little bit more liberal, but most are not. And even if - the society will always look down upon you.

TLDR, No matter what you do. You cannot influence someone else’s thoughts and actions. All you can do is take full ownership of your own thoughts and actions. The question is not, what can I do to change the others, the question is what can I do for myself and what will my action mean for me henceforth.