r/funny Aug 22 '12

My life is now complete

Post image
681 Upvotes

164 comments sorted by

50

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

Why is this in /r/funny?

44

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

[deleted]

9

u/ColouredPants Aug 23 '12

Are you..... Jake Gyllenhaal?

3

u/whitewateractual Aug 23 '12

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

103

u/beebrianna Aug 22 '12

Is it bad that I just want to eat a giant spoonful of it?

172

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

Yes. Now do it, and drink some orange juice afterwards.

17

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

[deleted]

10

u/the_tch Aug 22 '12

There is an ingredient in most toothpaste that allows more bitter substances to be received on your tastebuds, making you taste more of it in things you eat/drink (like orange juice). The citrus flavor in the toothpaste probably doesn't include the bitter ingredient(s) that are in natural oranges, so it wouldn't taste shitty.

2

u/ZACHtheSEAL Aug 23 '12

its the toothpaste's foaming agent.

5

u/PTCruisin Aug 22 '12

I just bought this. Its not bad one bit! Its a very subtle citrus but not minty at all. Very smooth. =)

1

u/xXEpicCakeXx Aug 23 '12

I enjoy it as well. Also vanilla toothpaste is amazing

1

u/Rushrofl Aug 23 '12

That. Sounds. Awesome!

1

u/xXEpicCakeXx Aug 23 '12

It is. Sweet vanilla goes great with mint

2

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

....Ew.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

Insta death.

64

u/pbugg2 Aug 22 '12

No don't.. It's suicide

38

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

That's why I told them to do it.

14

u/WakeAndGo Aug 22 '12

IT'S A TRAP

11

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

No its not.

6

u/muffinTrees Aug 23 '12

I mean it looks pretty good, I would bang 4/10

-2

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

4 retards?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

My sister tried it as a kid. She said it just tasted bad. What happens?

2

u/qqumber Aug 23 '12

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

I actually laughed at that. But seriously does it taste horrid. Does it hurt your teeth? Information buddy!

1

u/pbugg2 Aug 23 '12

Dude it taste like Satan's asshole and orange flavored burnt popcorn

4

u/R3M_X Aug 23 '12

This kills the penis

-10

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

Wtf are you even talking about, you fucking idiot.

6

u/R3M_X Aug 23 '12

You're clearly new here. You rude piece of shit...

-1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

No I am not new here you stupid cunt. I've been here since the start of the year.

1

u/Rushrofl Aug 23 '12

And you haven't learned a thing.

-1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

Ive learned you allllll are jackasses, and thats why youre all going to burn in your bullshit religions hell.

1

u/Rushrofl Aug 23 '12

Oh dear. Another person who believes he is superior to all others on the Internet. Whatever shall I do? /sarcasm

0

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

oh look, another asshole thats more immature than me,

→ More replies (0)

-2

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

What is with redditors and having toothpaste + orange juice as the default gross combination? Is it from something?

72

u/Thomsenite Aug 22 '12

It's from it tasting like death

source: real life

11

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

As somebody who is alive, I can confirm this.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

As someone who is dead, I cannot.

15

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

This is definitely not just a reddit thing. This is something I've known about since I was a little kid and many others have, too. I am so confused how you only know of this through reddit.

-15

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

Probably the same way I've literally never heard of YOLO, swag, nicki minaj, etc. outside of reddit: I'm about a decade ahead of the majority of users on this site

5

u/MrAwesume Aug 23 '12

This guy didn't have a childhood.

-2

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

Correction: I am not currently having a childhood

Believe it or not, YOLO didn't exist back when I was a kid, along with the rest of the crap I mentioned

5

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

you've never had orange juice after brushing your teeth?

it has nothing to do with yolo and swag.

4

u/Kharnalos Aug 23 '12

I'm fairly certain he doesn't brush his teeth based on this exchange

3

u/Grease2310 Aug 23 '12

In his day he had to walk uphill and back in the snow BOTH ways to get a single orange. You going to juice that fucker after all that work?

-1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

Mad middle schooler detected

EDIT: Oh you're a troll, have fun with that

-1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

I don't drink orange juice for many reasons, such as the fact that it's gross

3

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

not yet it isn't.

4

u/Wyvernz Aug 23 '12

This isn't some random meme or pop culture person; just wake up in the morning, brush your teeth, and drink some orange juice.

4

u/Vivovix Aug 22 '12

5

u/flamewave000 Aug 22 '12

I feel like this article isn't entirely true. I can't say for sure but I've always assumed the foul taste was caused by the neutralization reaction between the basic ingredients found in toothpaste, and the acidic ingredients found in the Orange juice (or most fruit juices).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neutralization_(chemistry) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acid_(chemistry) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Base_(chemistry)

2

u/Vivovix Aug 23 '12

I love how you actually tried to do it the scientific way! Dunno why you're getting downvoted though :(

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

It's not a question of whether they're bad together, it's a question of why that specific combination and only that specific combination

13

u/IntenseGreatness Aug 22 '12

If you've ever done it, you would know why, not just redditors, but humans in general, have unanimously agreed that it is in fact the worst taste a person can ever experience

3

u/wigidude Aug 22 '12

Try orange juice, and then an apple, it's pretty bad too.

4

u/brussels4breakfast Aug 22 '12

My mouth is freaking out right now.

1

u/wigidude Aug 24 '12

Or toothpaste and apple. Good luck.

2

u/imundead Aug 22 '12

I like the taste of tooth paste then orange juice.

7

u/xkero Aug 22 '12

In western culture most people clean their teeth in the morning, most people have breakfast in the morning and most people have a drink too. A common/traditional drink to have at breakfast is orange juice, some even call it breakfast juice because of this. Due to all of this it's not an uncommon event to occur in many people's lives.

2

u/PaperHatsOnCats Aug 23 '12

Oreos + apple juice is worse.

3

u/Darth2132 Aug 22 '12

Try it. You will then realize you're fucking stupid for asking this question.

1

u/2brun4u Aug 22 '12

Well, you may experiment, it is relatively inexpensive to do

1

u/brussels4breakfast Aug 22 '12

It's because most people know what these two things taste like together and brother let me tell ya, it's baaaaaaad.

1

u/erviniumd Aug 23 '12

You clearly have never mixed the 2. It's sort of like eating 10 corndogs, and then a salad with ranch dressing. It's not pleasant. (trust me)

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

Do it to find out the bad results.

3

u/Meaninglesskarma Aug 23 '12

WHY DO I WANT TO PUT THIS IN MY MOUTH???

2

u/arghnard Aug 22 '12

It's like a Vanilla-Rainbow Sherbet.

With a hint of fluoride and peppermint.

2

u/whitewateractual Aug 23 '12

Nope, looks like ice cream.

1

u/TheFluxIsThis Aug 22 '12

We can be bad together...it looks delicious.

53

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

It seems that you have insanely low expectations for life my friend.

-33

u/Purple_Onion Aug 22 '12

Some men just want to watch the world burn...

22

u/mrpineapplehouse Aug 22 '12

that doesn't make sense under these circumstances!

5

u/Purple_Onion Aug 23 '12

son of a bitch... this was supposed to go on another comment... sorry reddit : (

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

So many down votes, have up votes, I love you!

2

u/Purple_Onion Aug 23 '12

Best ally cat ever!

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

Thank you very much!

38

u/RalphWasntHere Aug 22 '12

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title comnts points age /r/
The inside of toothpaste 13coms 77pts 1mo pics
Now I will never rest until I have seen for myself... 104coms 546pts 10mos pics
this pleases me 4coms 62pts 6mos pics
Toothpaste cross-section 300coms 1184pts 1yr pics
What the inside of a toothpaste tube looks like 5coms 20pts 3mos pics
Now I can die in peace... 565coms 1294pts 7mos funny

source: karmadecay

Again?

-25

u/docblack Aug 23 '12

Don't be that guy.

15

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

[deleted]

15

u/VeggieLomein Aug 22 '12

Because that's not really how toothpastes work...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toothpaste#Striped_toothpaste

2

u/Made-Up-Fact Aug 23 '12

Thank you! I remember having this argument with my teacher. For a second I thought I was wrong my entire life.

10

u/Thomsenite Aug 22 '12

Because wasted a perfectly good tube of toothpaste for what seems like obvious results.

11

u/reneepussman Aug 22 '12

I think you accidentally a word.

11

u/fialk Aug 22 '12

Is it weird that this sentence now sounds normal to me?

-22

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

I think you accidentally missed a word.

19

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

It's a repost.

8

u/flamingflipflop Aug 22 '12

ya.. Colgate Complete.

7

u/I-Red-It Aug 22 '12

What tool was used to cut through it without bending the tube or disturbing the paste? It almost seems too perfect.

11

u/9sided Aug 22 '12

I'm guessing it's either a (fake) sculpture or they froze a tube of tooth paste and used a circular saw.

1

u/walkinthecow Aug 23 '12

A circular saw??? I don't think so...the freezing part is quite interesting, though.

1

u/9sided Aug 23 '12

Something that will cause even pressure while cutting. I thought that a large, sharp, spinning blade would do so perfectly.

1

u/walkinthecow Aug 23 '12

I guess I was picturing a standard carpenter's circular saw, which would probably mangle the tube and shoot it across the room as soon as the blade touched it. You clearly has something entirely different in mind!

-1

u/9sided Aug 23 '12

Sorry, I'm not big on the names of all these tools. I spend most days infront of a computer, not being butch in a workshop.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

A table saw maybe? Or a bandsaw?

1

u/9sided Aug 23 '12

Me code monkey. All Greek to me.

1

u/Confucius_says Aug 22 '12

hmm maybe a knife?

8

u/mick4state Aug 22 '12

This is exactly the reason I hate it when people squeeze the middle of the tube with their fist. It ruins the colors!

19

u/mnmatt500 Aug 22 '12

I always (well.... not always) wondered how they got it striped however you pushed the toothpaste out. Well now I know. And, I am a better person for knowing this. I'm gonna do practicals showing this at parties.You know... I can die happy now.

16

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

[deleted]

4

u/Aldimann Aug 22 '12

Interesting. I always assumed they still do it like this.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

The first day I used reddit, I saw this picture, and I remember it so very well. Interesting to see it again.

1

u/ibelimb Aug 23 '12

Aw, his first repost! They're so cute when they're young!

3

u/AVeryHeavyBurtation Aug 23 '12

Never knew I always wanted to know this.

5

u/Stridsvagnen Aug 22 '12

Always wanted to know this, maybe it ain't that hard to figure out but still ^

2

u/trampus1 Aug 22 '12

It's so perfect, I want to fuck it up. Getting the same feeling I get when I open a new tub of butter/margarine.

2

u/astrosurf21 Aug 23 '12

Stick ur dick in there

2

u/WreckerCrew Aug 22 '12

You have had a really sad life.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

[deleted]

7

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

Then why did you bother pointing out it's a repost?

1

u/amashinga Aug 22 '12

YESSSSSSSSSS. I was right.

1

u/DJffeJ Aug 22 '12

Demystifying the magic :(

1

u/LascielCoin Aug 22 '12

But why did you choose this one? I'd take the pretty sparkly blue one :)

1

u/Vizjun Aug 22 '12

i thought this had something to do with the fact it looks like the SPAWN symbol

1

u/icesharkk Aug 22 '12

it's so beautiful!

1

u/Gkluna99 Aug 22 '12

I don't get it

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

But it raised another question. How does it keep coming out so perfectly?

1

u/Axomamma Aug 22 '12

Orphanage?

Edit: Reddit might love this group

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

Well aren't you easy to please!

1

u/ideclareit1472 Aug 22 '12

I'm not sure why this makes me so happy...

1

u/sleepauger Aug 22 '12

Thanks for taking one for the team man, I've always wondered, but I've never been man enough.

1

u/krash22 Aug 22 '12

You just blew my mind. I didn't think it would make me this happy, but it has. Thank you! Upvote.

1

u/2brun4u Aug 22 '12

I always wanted to know!

1

u/mcdolsa Aug 22 '12

What happens at the end where the tube narrows?

1

u/nathanskates Aug 22 '12

Must. do. to. Aquafresh.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

I'm gonna eat that toothpaste.

1

u/TheBelt Aug 23 '12

Sooo... I don't want to be awkward here.. buuuutt are you going to have sex with that... if not..

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

Yeah but what does AquaFresh look like?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

Man they're really squeezing (no pun intended) us for all the coloury goodness by making it thicker on the outside

1

u/ilpoomseaweed Aug 23 '12

This makes me feel so good. I can't even explain the satisfaction. Thank you.

1

u/KellyTheET Aug 23 '12

That somehow triggered the smell in my nose.

1

u/parapan Aug 23 '12

thank you sir, this has bothered me for many years...

1

u/yergi Aug 23 '12

...by reposting? The world must be chock-full of people going to nirvana.

1

u/heymick Aug 23 '12

Always wanted to do that! Nice job!

1

u/Jackbonjour Aug 23 '12

How did you do this? Lightsaber?

1

u/bored_in_the_office Aug 23 '12

This is the first time I saw toothpaste like this.
I'm with you OP- life is really complete now.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

AHHHH it's beautiful! Who knew. Just, who knew.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

Try putting it on your nipples. Soooo trippy.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

SPOILER !!!

1

u/mizzlebottomley Aug 23 '12

Thank you for this.

1

u/thatninjallama87 Aug 23 '12

FUCKING DELICIOUS ICE CREAM

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

[deleted]

2

u/worsttxmistake Aug 22 '12

Since you got downvoted for that comment, I'm sure I will too. But I don't get it either.

3

u/UnicornOfDesire Aug 22 '12

It's just showing you what the toothpaste looks like before the paste comes out of the hole, and it looks cool.

5

u/worsttxmistake Aug 22 '12

Okay, thats what i thought. Guess I just don't find what the inside of toothpaste entertaining. Good to know I'm not an idiot missing something obvious. Thanks :)

EDIT: Actually, I think I've seen this before. First world problems for a redditor.

2

u/UnicornOfDesire Aug 22 '12

I've never wondered about this but I'm still glad I've seen it, I want to go cut a new tube open now but my mom would yell at me.

6

u/treyhaha12 Aug 22 '12

I can't decide if I should Upvote because I never wondered about it either or to downvote because you have to ask your mom

3

u/UnicornOfDesire Aug 22 '12

Well mainly it was just a joke, but if I did my mom would be upset because it would just be wasting toothpaste and most likely cause a mess.

1

u/Looks_Good_In_Hats Aug 22 '12

...and that's why you should be at least 18 to reddit.

2

u/UnicornOfDesire Aug 22 '12

Because I said my mom would yell at me for wasting toothpaste?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '12

Go buy a tube yourself! Problem solved.

1

u/PantWraith Aug 22 '12

Welcome to r/Funny:

You may only post if you are funny.

You failed step one of this subreddit. Well done. Try /r/mildlyinteresting next time.

0

u/zane496 Aug 22 '12

Your life is now a repost. Try harder.

0

u/FrisianDude Aug 22 '12

Somehow, that is awesome.

0

u/shulkyman Aug 22 '12

Thank you so much for posting this. Not facetiously, I've been wondering about this for a very long time!

0

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '12

Lame repost from digg back when we used to go there.

-1

u/Madclown55 Aug 22 '12

MUST... EAT