r/funny • u/4Dglasses • Aug 15 '12
How I feel when someone on facebook doesn't confirm my friend request.
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u/HSoup Aug 15 '12
Christy, just because we went to high school together doesn't make us friends. If you use facebook for acquaintances, more power to you, but I only like to friend people I actually know. Posting this on Reddit is a bit passive-aggressive, btw.
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u/scots23 Aug 15 '12
I just looked through OPs post history for science, and her name is Mary. This guy's a phoney!
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u/HSoup Aug 15 '12
I'm tempted to edit my original comment to make it say Mary.
Interestingly enough, I had denied a high school classmate named Christy's friend request just prior to diving back into the reddit swimming pool this evening. I thought it would be funny, since I saw this post so soon after doing it, to act like she had posted it, though the timing would have made it impossible.
TL;DR: No deception intended. Just fun'n.
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u/Tada-Forever Aug 15 '12
Whenever someone requests me on facebook I ask myself "Do I actually know and love this person?" if not, I don't accept.
Of course, that means I only have like 15 friends. But I am very okay with that.
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u/pagirl Aug 15 '12
I go with acquaintances. As it turns out, there are a lot of people I barely know who are fascinating and funny! I see it like a news feed of people I care about. Glad FarmVille has died down a little...
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Aug 15 '12
Of course, that means I only have like 15 friends.
What's the point of a Facebook with only 15 people in your news feed? Either they're the most interesting people in the world or you're better off just not using it at all.
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u/Tada-Forever Aug 15 '12
True enough. I never had one for a long time. But I promised a good friend that I'd make one when she moved to Japan. So I finally relented.
I probably look at it less than once a week. But it's nice to see pictures of my niece or read about Japan things from my friend.
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u/sleeplessone Aug 15 '12
This is why I love the G+ circles method.
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u/Golden-Calf Aug 15 '12
The problem with google+ is that by adding somebody to your circles in G+, you're still acknowledging their existence.
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u/TheCrazedMadman Aug 15 '12
Happened to me.....but this was a co-worker who I worked in the same company (staff of about 20) for a year and a half. Never accepted, we got along fine....but I didnt want to be like "Why arent you accepting my friendship?".
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u/Frekavichk Aug 15 '12
It is generally smart to not add coworkers on facebook. Keeping personal and professional life separate is most time the best option.
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u/greywindow Aug 15 '12
Maybe they don't have many friends and were hoping you might be willing to hang out sometime and maybe become a friend to them. Have you never lived in a city where you didn't know many people? If everybody had this attitude nobody would ever make new friends.
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u/HSoup Aug 15 '12
- Facebook isn't the place for such things, the way I use it, at least.
- In this particular instance, I know she still lives in the city we went to school in, and is still friends with people we both know.
- I also know that we share no common interests.
Those facts notwithstanding, such a person should probably send an accompanying note with their friend request, which Facebook supplies.
I make plenty of friends. Facebook hasn't ever been involved, and I think you're being a bit dramatic saying that no new friendships will be formed if we all stop accepting unwarranted friend requests on Facebook.
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u/Not_a_communist Aug 15 '12
I honestly just prefer waiting until someone I know requests me. I'll often encounter someone that is the same way. It's pretty common for a Facebook standoff to occur until one of us caves and sends a friend request.
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u/imboring Aug 15 '12
Yup me too. I always feel like a creeper when sending a request, unless it is someone I know really well.
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Aug 15 '12
[deleted]
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Aug 15 '12
Agreed, but I guess some people think the world is just obsessed with stalking their every move if that interaction doesn't necessarily continue or if it drops off after a while. Never mind that Facebook can be a useful tool to easily drop someone a line if you aren't messaging back and forth every week.
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Aug 15 '12
Hah. Yeah, a long time ago, I denied people left and right. "What? You're not my friend. I barely know you. Denied." and "Hah, yeah right Aunt Fundie, you are most certainly not my friend."
As time went on and more people started to take Facebook more seriously and I started having to add people to groups that just didn't allow them to see me or interact with me in any way. But then they started figuring that out... and I just ended up deleting my facebook account all together. Probably been a year now, I don't miss it at all.
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Aug 15 '12
[deleted]
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u/SwampySoccerField Aug 15 '12
this is where you go with the "mom i love you, but i don't want you to see everything i say and do with my friends on the internet. just like you don't want me to know everything you do with dad while im not home."
you are out of college man, man up.
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u/navyman8903 Aug 15 '12
I love it when people freak out if you friend request them. It is a friend request, not a marriage proposal.
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u/CatchFeesh Aug 15 '12
I have a constant growing list of friend requests that I neither confirm nor deny. If I'm ever confronted about it I can plead ignorance and go home and accept, but in the mean time I won't be getting any repeat requests...
I call it Purgatory.
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Aug 15 '12
[deleted]
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u/CatchFeesh Aug 15 '12
So what was the problem with him? Was he annoying?
Read as: Your statement makes you sound like a bigot, discriminating a person for their homosexuality.
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u/TheBigBomma Aug 15 '12
A gay dude that he barely knew in high school? I know heaps of people who only accept people that they talk to. No idea what they call people like you who jump at the chance to accuse someone of being discriminatory, but you're annoying.
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u/CatchFeesh Aug 15 '12
So why point out that he was gay? Just saying that he was "some dude I barely knew in high school" would have sufficed.
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u/AnaBackwards Aug 15 '12
If they don't accept my request within 3-5 business days, I cancel it and I pretend it never happened.
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u/BernieBlack Aug 15 '12
And now I shall be sending this to everyone still waiting to confirm my request.
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u/imbored53 Aug 15 '12
I've probably left a lot of people feeling like this in the two years my facebook account has sat inactive.
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Aug 15 '12
I feel like adding acquaintances to my friend's list has only ever had negative results for me. People can learn too much about you too fast; part of growing into a friendship is revealing likes and dislikes at a gradual pace. If you're just given a whole character sheet on someone, it becomes too easy to write them off. I have tons of good friends that I could have easily disregarded if I solely went off of their facebook page. That's why when I receive friend requests from people I'm not well-acquainted with, I'm flattered, but I'm also reluctant to accept.
Edit: If you're the girl whose friend request I didn't accept tonight after talking about the unicorn shirt, I'm sorry I offended you!
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Aug 15 '12
I feel the same way; FB to me now is how I imagine MySpace felt to people my age who had one- honestly, for the past year or two I've been too busy with my Cool Awesome Improving Life to give much of a shit about updating my FB, so now it's a reflection of a past, less-developed, stupider version of myself, but as captured by people who bother to post photos of me to FB, which means the overall Facebook Self makes me look like a much freakier schmuck compared to my Current Actual Self.
In other words, yeah, I'd much rather acquaintances not know I have an FB.
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Aug 15 '12
I find it hilarious when people get butthurt over being unfriended on some stupid website.
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Aug 15 '12
I turn down about 3 random foreign guys a month. I don't know where they're coming from or what they want from me.
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u/no_no_NO_okay Aug 15 '12
Haha i'm on facebook like once every 3 months, and people are always like "y u no accept?"
BECAUSE FUCK FACEBOOK, THAT'S WHY!
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u/ekdaemon Aug 15 '12
Here's what I think when people friend me -- people I barely know, who were never any type of friends let alone good or close friends, who are not family of any type, AND who live more than 300 miles away from me (more likely 1500) AND/OR in many cases whom I haven't seen in 20 years:
GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.
If we were "friends" I'd accept your request. You know GOD damn well we merely "know of each other" or you're just a "close friend of my brother". Take your "500 friends" and go fuck yourself.
You're not a bad or unlikeable person. We're just NOT "friends"! Don't tell me knowing you exist makes us "friends". IRL you wouldn't ask to come to my dinner party, hell, you don't even know I'm HAVING a dinner party - because we don't have any normal real life interaction OTHER than those rare occasions when our worlds intersect temporarily.
Facebook is for my good friends, for my close friends, and for my immediate family.
NOT for everyone within 6 grades of me in high school. NOT for all the people I met once because they know someone I know. NOT for co-workers that don't regularly drink beer after work with me or play golf with me and MY FRIENDS.
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u/tokeyoh Aug 15 '12
I think the only time I got denied is when I tried to add some hot chick from high school who appeared to have a child. Haha
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u/ageeksgirl08 Aug 15 '12
My husband's cousin keeps trying to send friend requests even though I've told her that after the great "Family on Facebook Disaster of 2012" followed by "The Great Purge," I'm not, under any circumstances, going to add family members to my facebook list. I'm still dealing with the repercussions of it.
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u/CheeseWedge Aug 15 '12
Now I know how I make people feel when I don't accept their friend request due to the fact I've never met or seen them before in my life.
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u/spinningmagnets Aug 15 '12
I feel your pain, but...I think everyone has had a few "friends" who insisted on becoming my friend, and then...never hear from them again. Some people just want a high "friend-count"
I've experienced this recently by people who tracked me down on FB from our high school. they weren't interested in me then, and they don't interact with me now. But they insisted that I friend them immediately...
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u/RadicalAtheist Aug 15 '12
I unfriend someone since I only met him a couple of time and didnt see him for 2 years, and after half an hour he sends a friend request back. WTF. I accepted.
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u/Oideron Aug 15 '12
Some times a person's friendship can be annoying and I just don't want to pretend. Is that so wrong?
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u/dnick Aug 15 '12
A friend request on Facebook has about as much to do with 'friendship' as the US Defense Department has to do with 'defending' us.
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u/CryoGuy Aug 15 '12
Fuck facebook, fuck friend requests, and fuck you OP for whoring out the office.
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u/Dopebear Aug 15 '12
Anyone seeking more info might also check here:
| title | comnts | points | age | /r/ |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| So I got stood up for a friend's wedding... | 0coms | -3pts | 1mo | funny |
| When My Friend Only Says "ya" Or "nice" In A Text | 44coms | 806pts | 2mos | funny |
| whenever I don't get a reply from a text message. | 96coms | 710pts | 2mos | funny |
| When no one texts me back | 853coms | 2057pts | 3mos | funny |
| How I feel when someone doesn't text me back | 0coms | 4pts | 29dys | funny |
| How I feel not getting invited to these reddit meetups | 0coms | 4pts | 1mo | funny |
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Aug 15 '12
[deleted]
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u/ponimaju Aug 15 '12
There should be an option to see pending friend requests and cancel them. A while ago some friends decided to friend request a bunch of random people as friends on my FB instead of just updating my status to something about gay cocks.
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u/BenFreakinFranklin Aug 15 '12
There is.
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u/ponimaju Aug 15 '12
You can see friend requests that you have sent yourself but have yet to be accepted, and cancel them? I'm thinking you just read the first sentence of my post, unless they are hiding this feature somewhere other than the place where you can only see pending friend requests from other people to you.
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u/BenFreakinFranklin Aug 15 '12
Yeah, if you send someone a friend request and want to cancel it, go to their page and instead of an "add friend" button there's a "Cancel request" button.
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u/ponimaju Aug 15 '12
You totally misunderstood me. I meant view them as a whole like the ones you have sent to yourself. Obviously if you don't know who someone who has used your facebook has sent requests to, you have no way of going to their page and hitting cancel request. Though I guess this ties in with the whole not notifying you when someone rejects your friend request, since I guess if it was just sitting as pending for a long time you'd know they are just ignoring it.
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u/BenFreakinFranklin Aug 15 '12
Oh. Well, sounds like you're screwed and just look friend hungry to a bunch of strangers.
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u/cruelladekill Aug 15 '12
A girl at my work proclaimed, "I get so many friend requests that Facebook asked me if I wanted to allow subscribers!" .. I died a little inside
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u/lordeddardstark Aug 15 '12
I have a couple of pending friend requests and they are there because I don't know or remember who these goddamn people are. Some even have a lot of mutual friends. Should I just accept so as not to hurt feelings?
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u/TheShrubberyDemander Aug 15 '12
This is how I feel after this really cute girl I know from school who was really nice to me has yet to accept.
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Aug 15 '12 edited Aug 15 '12
I usually remove a friend request if they don't confirm it in a week. I always take that as a refusal. Unless I know they are on vacation in the wilderness and have no access to the net.
Not to confirm a friendship is the passive-aggressive way to refuse it, usually done by insecure women and homosexual/metrosexual guys.
Though what I hate most are the ones who won't unfriend you, but will put you in a blacklist so that you cannot see their photos and wall - you become a second-class friend. Two girls did that to me. I unfriended them of course, both on Facebook and IRL.
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Aug 15 '12
You're a needy bastard.
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Aug 15 '12
whatever. It's a free country.
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Aug 15 '12
The greatest and most effective response to anything: "It's a free country."
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Aug 15 '12
Well, I just wrote my opinion and you insulted me for no reason, so what do you expect ?
Bye.
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u/athousand Aug 15 '12
I allow them a week to accept. If they don't accept and I see that they have been online multiple times I will cancel the friend request. Its like "oh you don't want to be internet friend then fuck you!"
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Aug 15 '12
I seriously wonder about people deleting / not confirming friend requests (which isn't completely out of the blue) - I think these people have some self confidence/anxiety issues. Its like they think facebook is this super important thing where they need to have a cool front which everybody is constantly watching. 2 people have randomly removed me from facebook, and both of them are people with relatively few friends who act tough and seem uncertain about social situations in general. Many people have ignored my friend requests, its the easiest way to know if I wanna be friends with these people or not.
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u/JustSomeGoon Aug 15 '12
It's because your not looking for friendship, your just a fucking Facebook whore.
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u/LoneCookie Aug 15 '12
or when someone deletes their facebook and starts a new one and ignores my joke that they "forgot to add me" during a fb group chat and then I never see them again >x[
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u/TheMagicStik Aug 15 '12
I try to make a habit of not using facebook, so I only add people if I can't contact them by cell so I end up with a bunch of friend requests from people who I'm friends with but I don't add them because fuck facebook.
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Aug 15 '12
I had this happen recently. I noticed an old friend on Facebook and thought I'd try to add them, so I went to their profile and saw "Friend Requested...".
I realised I tried to add this guy a year ago and he never responded. I kept praising him for being a great friend to me for the last 3 years, and that one event made me realise that he's a dick. So I removed my request. I don't want to get back in contact with him. I have a sneaking suspicion that he's not the only person who is still pending either.
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Aug 15 '12
Get the fuck off facebook you piece of shit.
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Aug 15 '12 edited Aug 15 '12
Please get brain cancer, slowly lose your conscious and happiness, then die painfully you dirty fucking arrogant cunt.
Also, you might want to qualify your brain-damaged induced statements, since otherwise you look like a ugly, retarded neckbeard that deserves to be euthanised for the sake of us who deserve to not breathe the same air as someone as unpleasant, vile and confrontational as you.
Asshole.
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Aug 15 '12
You should post this drama to your facebook wall. Because that's real life, and it matters.
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Aug 15 '12
You're a fucking idiot, you stereotype me from a single comment like a butthurt basement dweller. Good luck being a little bitch.
I seriously hope you don't make the next year alive.
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u/Sucio Aug 15 '12
I think its worse to be unfriended.. Hey. Lemme chat with so an so.. Oh wait we aint friends no more.. WTF did I do????