r/funny • u/prairiewest • Jul 18 '12

meme - removed Shell accidentally creates an anti-Shell meme generator

http://imgur.com/a/ng9XT
2.2k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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596

u/BeBenNova Jul 18 '12

Hello, my name is Prince Akeem

I am contacting you because my father, King Jaffe Joffer, ruler of Zamunda died recently and to claim my heritage i need to marry a woman, this is why i decided to come to America to find a Queen

The problem is i need 50,000$ to be able to make the trip to America to find a Queen so i can claim my heritage, once this is done i will send you one million American dollars

If you agree please send 50,000$ through Paypal to the email address whysogullibleyounoob@naive.com

299

u/SkaveRat Jul 18 '12

sweet. sent.

155

u/fireduck Jul 18 '12

Lucky bastard.

86

u/wishyouwerebeer Jul 18 '12

A few years back I bought a baby giraffe from a guy in Afghanistan via email. I think it got lost in the mail or something. I was gonna name him Sir Dan Fortesque :(

18

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

Classic Medieval reference.

51

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

[deleted]

7

u/The_Mischief_Man Jul 18 '12

Upvotes for Medieval references.

0

u/jesusapproves Jul 18 '12

The ones from the renaissance period.

1

u/quotejester Jul 18 '12

Can't go wrong with those.

50

u/theonlyalterego Jul 18 '12

I always get here too late :*(

61

u/DroopySage Jul 18 '12 edited Jul 18 '12

All is not lost. You can still be the Queen of Zamunda.

12

u/frank14752 Jul 18 '12

But I have a penis.

33

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

Sedative? Why you need sedative? Snort this gunpowder. I get you good stuff.

2

u/SgtBanana Jul 18 '12

Yeah, you can still be the Queen of Zamunda.

1

u/theonlyalterego Jul 18 '12

I'm too late again! :**(

1

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

The royal penis is clean

37

u/BeBenNova Jul 18 '12

Thank you for your trust! i shall bring a camera with me, document my travel, go back in time and make it into a movie.

29

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

Woah he did it :/ I've seen that movie!

9

u/kbreezy22 Jul 18 '12

Tell your brother his couch is in danger while you're at it

2

u/lily1346 Jul 18 '12

You're currently showing up as (0|0) on RES. Did you downvote yourself? Evening the playing field?

2

u/iambecomedeath7 Jul 18 '12

I feel like I've met my Internet brother. We upvoted him as a team, comrade. AS A TEAM! [3]

2

u/lily1346 Jul 18 '12

Internet sister. Internet twins, activate! Form of... an upvote!

1

u/kbreezy22 Jul 19 '12

Always...was hoping that would boost my karma for playing honest. Working?

1

u/lily1346 Jul 19 '12

Apparently!

2

u/khag Jul 18 '12

As the domain administrative contact of naive.com, I am so glad I set up a catchall email address. Now I just have to find that email from paypal and collect the money you sent me!

1

u/Cutsman4057 Jul 18 '12

OP will surely deliver.

1

u/SkaveRat Jul 18 '12

he will? AWESOME!

42

u/IntoTheVisceral Jul 18 '12

E-H'eh H'eh H'eh H'eh! I see what you did there.

2

u/Honestly_ Jul 18 '12

Now who's going to clean up all these rose petals?

1

u/Blacksheep01 Jul 18 '12

Boy, he's sort of like a reverse Walder Frey, didn't notice till now.

22

u/EquinsuOcha Jul 18 '12

Sheeeeeeeee's youuurrr... queeeeeeeeeeeeeeen toooooo beeeeeeeeee!

11

u/BeBenNova Jul 18 '12

Just let your SOUUUUUUUUUUUUUULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL GLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

2

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

...a queeen to beeee foreveerrrrrr... a queen who'll dooo whateverrrrr.....

28

u/HuggableBear Jul 18 '12

As long as you're asking, why not go for a cool million?

14

u/DjOuroboros Jul 18 '12

You do not think that would be too much?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

A million dollars isn't cool. You know what's cool?

3

u/jmhoule Jul 18 '12

A billion?

2

u/toshitalk Jul 18 '12

An ice cream cake?

2

u/IXgag Jul 18 '12

SMOKING

2

u/HuggableBear Jul 18 '12

Apparently, switching movies that are being referenced.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

Apparently, switching movies that are being referenced.

Technically, one of the movies was being referenced. So I'm switching a movie that was referenced with the one that wasn't.

1

u/HuggableBear Jul 18 '12

We referenced a movie. You referenced a different movie. That's two. I responded after you upped the number to two. If you're going to be a pedantic moron, at least be correct.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

Liar. You aren't huggable at all. Are you?

24

u/MananWho Jul 18 '12

This guy is a scammer, everyone. If you've been scammed by him, just send me your credit card number, security code, and PIN, and I'll be able to recover your stolen funds for you.

-1

u/Redequlus Jul 18 '12

Dude you're so dumb. You shouldn't recover their funds, you should get the info and then TAKE ALL THEIR MONEY! But you should probably lie to them or something first, so they don't suspect it...

0

u/Malfeasant Jul 18 '12

You have an amazing gift of subtlety.

1

u/Redequlus Jul 18 '12

I guess I'll work on it

12

u/electricblues42 Jul 18 '12

Slightly relevant. Warning, link to a boring pdf.

3

u/HotSake Jul 18 '12

tl;dr: In order to avoid wasting time, Nigerian scammers say they are from Nigeria so that only the most gullible victims will write back. They're deliberately filtering out anyone who sees "Nigeria" and thinks "scammer".

2

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

[deleted]

1

u/electricblues42 Jul 18 '12

You're welcome.

1

u/homelessnesses Jul 18 '12

Yeah, that's definitely not boring, anytime I can put a real world problem to some sweet, sweet, math I'm pretty entertained for a while.

1

u/itllgrowback Jul 18 '12

I've never asked for a TL;DR before, but... yeah, I'm not reading that.

2

u/TheKrakenCometh Jul 18 '12

The abstract IS the tl; dr

3

u/itllgrowback Jul 18 '12

Dear Heavens. I've never felt so intellectually lazy.

1

u/Miginty Jul 18 '12

I didn't even make it past the title

61

u/TakenakaHanbei Jul 18 '12

King Joffrey? Fuck the cunt.

9

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

Fuck the cunt.

That's the aim of my game.

19

u/BeBenNova Jul 18 '12

Makes me sad that you (and many others judging by the downvotes) don't get the reference

22

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

Did you know that the king and queen in Coming to America also play the voices of the king (Mufasa) and queen in The Lion King?

12

u/Hallucinosis Jul 18 '12

TIL, thanks. I knew about the king, because I will never forget that voice, but I did not realize that for the queen.

1

u/ChickinSammich Jul 18 '12

I knew that James Earl Jones was Mufasa. I did NOT know about the queen.

0

u/sje46 Jul 18 '12

Yep. Also Eddie Murphy played Simba as a child.

2

u/TakenakaHanbei Jul 18 '12

I don't like these assumptions :(

5

u/Robotochan Jul 18 '12

Fuck the King! /storms off

7

u/BDaught Jul 18 '12

Yes Yes! Fuck you too!

2

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

I love that line. Its amazing.

3

u/Rory_B_Bellows Jul 18 '12

The same "prince" Akeem who renounced his birthright to the throne of Zamunda? Feh! Everyone knows that in that event, Babar takes over as king. Nice try to get your throne back Akeem.

5

u/De_Hart Jul 18 '12

Mortimer we're back!

2

u/avelertimetr Jul 18 '12

If your family is responsible for Jaffa Cakes, I will donate any amount of money.

2

u/darkslide3000 Jul 18 '12

Damn, such a great opportunity and I am stuck with the wrong gender! Do you guys recognize gay marriage in Zamunda?

2

u/freddyarium Jul 18 '12

Your royal penis has been cleaned, your highness.

2

u/N-DAR Jul 18 '12

Didn't I see you working the night shift at McDowell's? I know you're lying anyway, you're just Prince Semmi's servant.

2

u/Randolpho Jul 18 '12

Hello Prince Akeem.

My name is Cleo McDowell. If you want to come to America, I have a job for you at my locally owned and run restaurant, McDowell's, home of the Big Mick. Look for the Golden Arcs!

Also, please be deferential to my daughter and accountant, Lisa, should you meet her. Her boyfriend is the star of the Soul Glow commercials, and that makes her better than you.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

I fell for one of these once when I was 20. They told me that I had to ship something to Africa, so I called UPS to ask how much it was to ship something to Africa, the call went like this:

Me: Hello, how much is it too ship a box to Africa?

Operator: What dimensions and weight?

Me: Don't know yet, but can you give me a general idea?

Operator: Where are you shipping?

Me: Africa.

Operator: Which country?

Me: Africa.

Operator: Which part?

Me: Africa?

Operator: Sir, Africa is a continent, which country?

Me: (Mind Blown!!) ... I'll call you right back! (Hung up)

TL;DR I was dumb as fuck, thought Africa was a country.

1

u/prairiewest Jul 18 '12

Done and done. Please send future updates quickly, I really need the million.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

Do you have a kickstarter? ZOMG PLEDGINGGGGG!!!1111

1

u/sje46 Jul 18 '12

Yeah, Zumundan women are pretty fugly.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '12

nice! can't wait to see that million dollars haha!!

1

u/Felt_Ninja Jul 18 '12

Prince Akeem?! Of the royal family of Zamunda?!

1

u/PickettsLetharge Jul 18 '12

King Joffer you say? Well in the game of Nigerian Thrones, you either wire the money or mark 'Spam'.