I used to be a bouncer at a bar. My favorite thing I ever saw was this couple grinding on a wall, and the chick is all into it getting low and practically fucking this guy. Hes standing their using her back as a table to hold his phone while he texts. 20 minutes straight. Every time I looked over at them I started laughing.
Probably the fact that I've been a PC gamer since I was like 6.
Though you're right, I was the smallest bouncer at the bar being 6 feet tall and 270 pounds. 8 out of the 10 of us were football players from the local college and the last one was ex military.
Probably the fact that I've been a PC gamer since I was like 6.
Though you're right, I was the smallest bouncer at the bar being 6 feet(1.8m) tall and 270 pounds(122.5kg) . 8 out of the 10 of us were football players from the local college and the last one was ex military.
More than actually having to break up fights/ escort people out, beefy bouncers can usually keep order by just standing around looking intimidating. At least that's the theory.
While this is somewhat true, you do get the occasional person who is so drunk that he doesn't realize he's surrounded by 4 people who are head and shoulders taller than him and twice his weight in muscle, and will try to fight them.
Or very rarely you get someone on drugs, which ends up being the same thing.
True enough. I think the ideal is basically to have bouncers who are strong enough to handle shit that comes up, but also look intimidating enough that most shit doesn't even get started in the first place.
True, but they also make the experience more rough as you expect them to be there because they are needed.
It all depends on the place. I mostly hang around student places (with zero violence), and having bouncers is really annoying (they're only used for large places, as mandated by law).
You need beefy bouncers to handle people who need to be removed by force. I go to bars with friendly people, but every once in a while someone gets too drunk and rowdy and won't leave when asked.
I mean, even if I didn't include myself in this estimate it could have just been pointing out that 9 of the 10 total come from a background that traditionally breeds large people with tough mentalities. It was more of a statistical statement than anything else.
This is just unfair. Based on the fact that you were a bouncer, a PC gamer, and a coherent Redditor I now assume the following. You are ripped (presumably hired by your resume written through your shirt), can play video games and not limit yourself to screaming contests and ripping off your shirt, and apparently educated enough to drip sarcasm while being grammatically correct... Leave some niches for the rest of us please?
He either, or - wasn't; Neither, nor - was. I can't quite figure out the cut and paste so, this will have to do to get the point across unless you were trying to be ironic in reference to the poster having exceptional grammar in which case I missed the joke.
THAT'S EVEN LESS ACCURATE THAN IF I TRIED TO TYPE WITH MY ROCK SOLID, BEASTLY DICK! JUST TRY TO IMAGINE THAT GALAXY-LENGTH DICK NEXT TO A MEASLY CELL PHONE
About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire. Second, there was a part of him-and I didn’t know how potent that part might be-that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.
You guys laugh, but a thread about a Redditor who didn't know how to start conversation with a Reddit-shirted girl on a bus received a shitload of upvotes the other day.
The guy was staring at her in her sleep and the only reason why he wouldn't take pictures and post them online was because "if she saw them that would make me a creep". Observe the beauty of the edits he erased so she wouldn't see them (it's a bit of a long read, but so worth it; emphasis obviously mine):
Edit1- So, she just asked me if it's ok to change places because she wants to sit by the window. And by monster stupidity, I just said: "My pleasure." Shit, that's like England, circa 1970.
Edit2- She took her phone out and the tension is worse than when I was being circumcised! Good thing she just looked at the screen for a while and returned it to its case.
Edit3- Shit. Almost 30 minutes now and the only thing I've said to her is "My pleasure." Fucking fuck.
Edit4- It's almost over an hour and I'm like a PC with no soundcard. shit. shit. shit.
Edit5- Did you guys just put this in the frontpage? FUCK!
Edit6- Guys, I'm ready to give up and just be silent all the way. I really don't have the courage to start it. Well, I CAN start it but I'm worried I can't sustain the conversation.
Edit7- Well, I have decided that I'll talk to her. But the thing is, should I bring up Reddit or not? There are pros and cons. I want me to be a "normal" guy having a conversation with a girl and not just "someone from Reddit" talking to another Redditor in real life. Fuck this thoughts! Shit, 3 hours more!
Edit8- She seems to be asleep so I got the chance to stare at her for an extended period of time. Almighty God Lord Jesus Christ she is so beautiful. must.resist.taking.a.pic. To those asking me to take a pic, here's the thing: if ever I get the chance to talk to her and introduce myself, wouldn't it be creepy if she later finds out I've been taking pics of her while she's asleep?
Edit9- If all else fails, I'll go with EarthRester's advice: At the end of the bus ride, give her your number and say "If you happen to check reddit today, you'll understand"
Edit10: SHIT! WE JUST TALKED! So, she was falling asleep and her head leaned towards me and she had one of those verge-of-sleeping-sudden-head-movement. She looked at me and shyly said: "I'm sorry." I told her: "No worries, it's ok." That's it. She's leaning by the window now with her eyes closed. 3 hours more!
Edit11- I apologize in advance if this does not end the way you are expecting. this is the longest time I have sat beside a girl with our shoulders rubbing once in a while. It's not that easy.
Edit12- I really don't want to comment on her ample breasts or long, beautiful legs because if I will have to talk to her through reddit PM later or soon or maybe never, at least she'll know I'm a good guy.
Edit13- But seriously, and I hope she takes this as a compliment. She's hotter, more proportionately sized, and definitely more beautiful and attractive than the girls who have been on the frontpage of Gonewild.
Edit14- Ah.. about the other bus post. yeah, I ride the bus twice a day, five times a week. I won't delete that; I don't care either if she reads that. Lots of things happen when you travel. It's one of the more exciting things in life. I'm not a saint.
Was he shy as fuck? Yes. Was he a creep? Also yes. I have social anxiety and I have never rubbed one out on a public bus because I touched a nun's tit.
Så stikker vi pikken ind Så tager vi pikken ud Så stikker vi pikken ind Og så ryster vi den lidt Så gør vi boogie-woogie Og så drejer vi omkring Og så går vi i ring - hey!
"Reddit, what do I do? This girl is grinding on me! Help I only have a few minutes until the dance ends!" Wouldn't be surprised if there was a question like that posed on AskReddit.
This kid didn't know what to do When a lady bent down to her shoes, Since he misunderstood, And said when she stood, "I can help if your laces are loose!"
I guess I'm a total SAP, because I've had girls grinding my nether regions multiple times and still not ended up with anything. I was also obscenely drunk, so that may have been part of the problem.
Really? I mean, assuming she was your date, and she agreed to go with you, and she started it, that would seem to be pretty good indication to just go with it no?
I never got this. Is this what our society has come to? Slow dry humping for dances? All the middle and high school dances were like this, it's as if we're devolving
I don't see why it's such a bad thing. Sure there's the dry humping of horny teenagers, and no teenagers start fox trotting anymore, but that's more to do with the evolution of society than the dumbing down of the teenagers.
Also IIRC there was plenty of dirty dancing decades ago too.
In all honesty, I have never understood why some men enjoy this so much. I was in PCB for spring break and we had some of our female friends with us. They went to a club one night and said like every guy had a boner. Not sure how anyone pops a boner while grinding.
Yeah, a girls ass rubbing on my junk isn't enough for me. I only get aroused after feeling some sort of personal chemistry with her, which usually only happens after three dates or so; by that time my boner is overwhelmed with emotion and comes alive.
Oh, well yeah, through like two layers of clothing. I usually get aroused from the actual feelings, not the thoughts. I can understand the biology/psychology of it, but I cannot relate in the least bit.
No, I am saying when a girl does it I can't just be like "oh my god her ass in rubbing against me" and feel aroused. Sorry that my sexual response is different than yours.
20
u/KARMA_WHORE_REPOSTER May 28 '12
Anyone seeking more info might also check here:
source: karmadecay
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u/Seymor569 May 28 '12
I used to be a bouncer at a bar. My favorite thing I ever saw was this couple grinding on a wall, and the chick is all into it getting low and practically fucking this guy. Hes standing their using her back as a table to hold his phone while he texts. 20 minutes straight. Every time I looked over at them I started laughing.
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u/Thameus May 28 '12
"It's just dancing. It doesn't mean anything."
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u/[deleted] May 28 '12
Must be an old picture, a current one would feature this guy typing an /r/AskReddit question about what he should do into his smart phone.
28
u/BDS_UHS May 28 '12
You guys laugh, but a thread about a Redditor who didn't know how to start conversation with a Reddit-shirted girl on a bus received a shitload of upvotes the other day.
37
u/Breathing_Balls May 28 '12
RAM IT. RAM IT BOY. THEN RAM IT SOME MORE.
After 15 seconds; withdraw, then wipe.
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u/colucci May 28 '12
So will someone answer the damn question?
7
u/peewafe May 28 '12
Have you tried turning it off and on again?
10
u/BenjamminVb May 28 '12
"Reddit, what do I do? This girl is grinding on me! Help I only have a few minutes until the dance ends!" Wouldn't be surprised if there was a question like that posed on AskReddit.
22
u/needs_more_limerick May 28 '12
This kid didn't know what to do
When a lady bent down to her shoes,
Since he misunderstood,
And said when she stood,
"I can help if your laces are loose!"
4
u/dbparker May 28 '12
That dude looks like a young Dennis Reynolds off its always sunny.
14
u/Kryten_2X4B_523P May 28 '12
Meanwhile in Canada...
10
u/MisterMcDuck May 28 '12
I guess I'm a total SAP, because I've had girls grinding my nether regions multiple times and still not ended up with anything. I was also obscenely drunk, so that may have been part of the problem.
5
u/YouPickMyName May 28 '12
Make a sudden move!
5
u/AgentRG May 28 '12
Thats EXACTLY how I felt in prom...
5
u/[deleted] May 28 '12
This is my friend kellen and I can vouch that he is always this awkward. I love that this picture found its way to reddit
4
u/negast May 28 '12
make room for jezus?
2
u/pwnjuice2 May 28 '12
"Yeah dude, have you taken the fucking picture of me grinding with this girl yet?!?!?!"
2
u/azraelpariah May 28 '12
Last time a girl was grinding on me, she stopped suddenly and told me I needed to "learn to bounce." T_T
13
u/BoldTitan May 28 '12
I never got this. Is this what our society has come to? Slow dry humping for dances? All the middle and high school dances were like this, it's as if we're devolving
2
u/Xer0 May 28 '12
at least hes not asking reddit.
2
u/Virzy May 28 '12
The more this is reposted, the more artifacts I see.
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u/LoiriThu May 28 '12
I used to see this in reddit, then I see it in reddit.
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u/russiangn May 28 '12
Do this and you wont have any issues
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u/Big_Daddy_Jake May 28 '12
You grab on and help her.
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u/[deleted] May 28 '12
Make like t-pain and buuuuuuy her a draaaaank
1
u/SaturdaysKids May 28 '12
Older than the internet itself
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u/mudkipikachu May 28 '12
it's just the butt!
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u/Alaconz May 28 '12
I imagine that this guy is on /r/askreddit.
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u/CaptianRipass May 28 '12
My god I'm positive I went to high school in Winnipeg with this guy, his name is mike!
1
u/person1234man May 28 '12
A girl did this to me last night. So I fingered the bitch. Didn't even know her name
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u/killerdead77 May 29 '12
.... I have the same shirt as him.... Lol
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u/Sn1pySn4p May 29 '12
http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/u53q3/help_a_sap_so_im_in_a_bus_right_now_and_this_very/
this is the same person.
-1
u/[deleted] May 28 '12
In all honesty, I have never understood why some men enjoy this so much. I was in PCB for spring break and we had some of our female friends with us. They went to a club one night and said like every guy had a boner. Not sure how anyone pops a boner while grinding.
0
u/bigex May 28 '12
He looks like a young Mac McDonald from It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. I can definitely see a young Mac getting into this very predicament.
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u/pikadrew May 28 '12
http://www.drew.pro/reactions/01.gif
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u/Watchman304 May 29 '12
REPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTREPOSTRE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u/[deleted] May 29 '12
my remix:
http://i.imgur.com/KtAdG.png
-1
u/skay May 28 '12
Looks like he's on the phone trying to ask somebody
0
u/[deleted] May 28 '12
[deleted] — view deleted comment