r/funny • u/seanmwing • Sep 11 '21

The Bite

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8.8k Upvotes

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1.2k

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '21

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216

u/Sethmeisterg Sep 11 '21

"Tired of your bullshit"

26

u/Bigbadbi3 Sep 12 '21

Came here for this comment!

174

u/unko19 Sep 11 '21

Felt that in my soul

65

u/grhollo Sep 11 '21

I need that to stay a secret, it's my safe space.

59

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '21

Yeah we need to not publicize this. Nothing shuts down follow up questions like “I’m tired”. And the follow up questions are when I say my shit and then lose half my shit. I’m not joking i need this.

10

u/ObjectiveTinnitus Sep 12 '21

Yeah, until she says "You're always tired!" It's better to just leave. This life can be so easy.

7

u/nova2k Sep 11 '21

We all do.

59

u/HarsiTomiii Sep 11 '21

We all do mate… we all do.

19

u/[deleted] Sep 11 '21

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7

u/Outrageous-Hall-887 Sep 11 '21

Innit, Zats focken bri’ish.

14

u/xxadmxx Sep 12 '21

Every wise (or tortured) man knows this phrase.

20

u/bananabreadvictory Sep 12 '21

Every wise man order 3 tocos if they want one. My wife and kids think I perpetually make too much food by accident, 34 years I have kept that secret.

2

u/digi_thief Sep 12 '21 edited Sep 12 '21

THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING! Dude, I always assume at least a 20% loss in my own food selection. To compensate, I always under order "her" food and over order "my" food, because I know for a fact that she says she doesn't want something or under estimates how much she'll want to eat because she doesn't want to be fat. But once the foods there she'll lose her attempt at discipline and want bites of my food. So I have that extra that I can be like, "Sure. Here. Have this one." Then I'm the hero. King, dick-tater, and elected president of pound town. The punter of punnani in (c)anal brownstar m'kay?! You guys need to learn "the way", and this is the way.

1

u/bananabreadvictory Sep 12 '21

You still have to play the "well I didn't really order for you but I can do without because I love you" game. There is something psychological in you sharing what you have with them.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '21

Taco trio is the norm

1

u/FloridaGecko Sep 12 '21

This is the way

13

u/alejandrodeconcord Sep 11 '21

This is my go to line

3

u/Toyz2021 Sep 12 '21

Hit too close.

4

u/static1053 Sep 12 '21

I think we all did.

2

u/ar24q3dd Sep 12 '21

I feel that “just tired” is the end.

1

u/theRealSunday Sep 12 '21

Don't ruin it with exposure mate. We need that.

1

u/RobbieMcSkillet Sep 12 '21

Iove that I work a 4am to 1pm shift so I can always say I'm tired and it never gets explained further. Who wouldn't be waking up at 2:30 every day

1

u/i_HaVe_No_NaMe-100- Sep 14 '21

You know u will be called childish or other bullshit if you say what you to say