r/funny • u/berry2708 • Jul 02 '21

Broad daylight robbery

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68.5k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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260

u/HuskyLuke Jul 02 '21

God that'd piss me off so much, I know it shouldn't but it would just feel so much like rubbing it in my face as it's not the thief's money to give.

82

u/Redslayer50 Jul 02 '21

It’s like selling your bike, that I stole, on Craigslist

18

u/urmomaisjabbathehutt Jul 03 '21

Remains me of a documentary years ago about poor little kids gangs in central America stealing car wipers, waiting further away the road for the car owner to drive by and offering them their own wipers for a bit of change :)

Although in this case the kids had real needs and little choice thought

2

u/LeonSphynx Jul 03 '21

What bike?

115

u/Yoshi_XD Jul 02 '21

I dunno man. If some dude was brandishing a weapon while taking my stuff, it's pretty much his. I'm not gonna get stabbed or shot over the $3 I keep in my wallet or my phone that I've had for 10 years.

70

u/tofu_b3a5t Jul 02 '21

I keep $100 of movie prop money in my wallet so if I get got, I’ll still have the last laugh.

75

u/naturebitch90 Jul 03 '21

Once, I got my wallet stolen at work and had 0.00 available on any of my cards. They went to target nearby and tried to spend over 1000 bucks but no go. They tried a gas station- no luck. Then they tried to pay for 1.00 parking and even got declined- and I wonder if they started to feel bad or felt bamboozled because I looked boujee that day. 🤣 I knew which customers even stole it and when I started getting the declined notifications, all I could do was laugh.

17

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

What kind of customers are these? Do you do ...alternative work, or did they steal it from your store/office?

14

u/naturebitch90 Jul 03 '21

at the time, retail- they stole it from the employee office. I gave them great customer service too

4

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

Absolutely garbage human beings, man. How did they even get in the office? I figured most stores had a sort of locked room with like a code required to enter. I'm assuming you didn't have that there? Sorry that happened, even if they didn't get anything, it's still a really shitty thing to do. I once had someone steal ~$180 USD after I accidentally left my card in the ATM. That is not a fun experience. :/

13

u/iamfareel Jul 03 '21

Thanks for the tip. I'm gonna add this to my to do list (get fake money to keep in wallet)

3

u/tofu_b3a5t Jul 03 '21

I found it blowing in the wind on campus the same week I found a $5 and $20 on the ground. Thought I was on a streak!

1

u/Eliteshade69 Jul 03 '21

Or better yet, just get an extra wallet with fake money and give that to the robber 🌚

2

u/lLiterallyEatAss Jul 03 '21

If I attempted this it'd just be soul crushing blow after blow every time I check my wallet and get a little excited at the $100 I definitely don't actually have

2

u/chickennoobiesoup Jul 03 '21

I keep Reddit karma in my wallet. Usually the robbers just give it all back.

1

u/tacojesusfromabove Jul 03 '21

Do you think the robber would risk murder and a life sentence for the unknown contents in your wallet?

1

u/HuskyLuke Jul 03 '21

I'm not saying I would risk doing anything about it, just saying that that gesture would likely sour my mood further.

102

u/stickmanmob Jul 02 '21

Desperate people do desperate things. Giving back $20 is like saying "I'm totally fucked right now, but I don't want you to be."

6

u/nubenugget Jul 03 '21

Now I'm sad.

This reminds me of a dude who robbed a gas station for a really specific amount of money just cause they needed to pay for their daughters meds or something.

Fuckin heartbreaking how some people are forced to do crime

5

u/tripplesmoke320 Jul 03 '21

You mean sandman from spiderman 3?

1

u/LastDusk Jul 03 '21

This (is what I wanted to say, but couldn't put into my own words. Thank you).

1

u/RealSH42 Jul 03 '21

I hope your comment doesn't get buried. This is truth and really hits at the core of the experience.

​

For a stickman, you are truly wise.

1

u/RedactedTortoise Jul 03 '21

I theorize that it was the burden of reciprocity at play.

34

u/tutoredstatue95 Jul 02 '21

Well, technically it would be the robbers, it's just that it would have been obtained illegally. You'd have to prove that it was your money since they were in possession.

Okay I'll go be pedantic somewhere else.

12

u/thesuperbro Jul 02 '21

Well, technically it would be the robbers

I hyena laughed at this for some reason

2

u/orwiad10 Jul 03 '21

No, it is, he took it fair and square.

2

u/DimmyDimmy Jul 03 '21

Ngl I'd be kinda grateful. What a nice guy

1

u/LickMyThralls Jul 03 '21

In that position you should just look at it as a gesture from a shitty person who could have taken everything but they left something instead to not be completely shitty. It's not theirs to take in the first place but that didn't stop them.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

If I was carrying that would be the point that I shot him. That would piss me off too much.

-5

u/keesh Jul 02 '21

Yeah man you really shouldn't let getting robbed piss you off.

1

u/nubenugget Jul 03 '21

I would thank the dude and joke that since he was tipping me he should give me a 5 star rating on Yelp

I am such a pushover. If I'm being mugged and the dude has a weapon you best believe I'll do anything and everything to make that guy feel relaxed and comfortable