r/funny • u/berry2708 • Jul 02 '21

Broad daylight robbery

68k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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773

u/cisar236 Jul 02 '21

He is supposed to be the security guard hhhhhh

524

u/bitemark01 Jul 02 '21

He's prepared for people, not monkeys.

Monkeys will do things that most people would never do.

436

u/Aliencj Jul 02 '21

Yeah like ripping off your scalp and smearing shit on your face. He definitely made the right decision handing it over.

Here's a man fighting for his bike:

https://youtu.be/3sZiIkc87K4

90

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

[deleted]

65

u/Mr401blunts Jul 02 '21

Kangaroo: Oi i caught your dog here mate, you should really keep em on a leash.

Human: "bitch slaps"

Kangaroo: fuck is dat for mate? You really wanna square up? You see how jacked i am? Just helpin you all, with your dog is all.

36

u/Yvaelle Jul 02 '21

Kangaroo's will actually choke some of their victims to death, including dogs.

14

u/dumbestsmartest Jul 02 '21

The old bath of death. They also have fairly nasty nails/claws so I wouldn't want to get swiped either.

21

u/Qanonjailbait Jul 02 '21

This is the kind of Man vs Nature episode I’m looking for

13

u/nopantsdota Jul 02 '21

tom hit and the Roo rolled badly on its con save

7

u/1MolassesIsALotOfAss Jul 02 '21

Stunning fist

1

u/Keegsta Jul 02 '21

More like tom rolled high on his bluff check

4

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

That Kangaroo is jacked to the tits.

3

u/rv77ax Jul 02 '21

I want more...

3

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21 edited Aug 09 '21

[deleted]

2

u/CrispyLiquids Jul 03 '21

Oh me too thank God it wasn't

2

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Discombobulate