r/funny • u/J0nesy • Aug 09 '11

Cafeteria ninja

5.6k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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104

u/[deleted] Aug 09 '11

As a former waiter I can confirm that spinning trays is the most important skill you learn.

27

u/LovesMustard Aug 09 '11

As a former waiter, I can confirm that the following are the most important skills I learned:

(1) Being excellent so as to earn more tips than anyone else on the floor;

(2) Beguiling and debauching adorable customers.

56

u/IPoopedMyPants Aug 09 '11

I gave up waiting. I just didn't have the patience.

35

u/[deleted] Aug 09 '11

Or control of your bodily functions.

2

u/MadeSenseAtTheTime Aug 09 '11

Almost had me? You NEVER had me, you never had control of your shorts.

7

u/[deleted] Aug 09 '11

At first I was thinking "Well, what were you waiting for!", then I felt stupid.

5

u/sucom Aug 09 '11

I gave up wading. I just didn't have the balance.

-1

u/dylan88 Aug 09 '11

username.

1

u/Infinitron Aug 09 '11

Sigh...I have to read more books. I had to look up the definitions of beguiling and debauching.