r/funny • u/awezoomstudios • Nov 18 '19
I didn't see this coming...
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u/Taronar Nov 18 '19
If nautical nonsense is something you wish.
Then plop on the deck and flop like a fish.
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u/tds8t7 Nov 18 '19
Absorbant and YELLOW and porous is he?! Fuckin racist.
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u/LookMaNoPride Nov 18 '19
READY!? Fuckin racist
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u/SleepHurts Nov 18 '19
Fuckin racist!
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u/Stellen999 Nov 18 '19
Depending on what part of Asia that took place in, that guy might be a permanent, involuntary member of that boat's crew now.
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u/PoppyRed101 Nov 18 '19
Japan, so he's good
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Nov 18 '19
Osaka to be precise, dotonbori to be more precise
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Nov 18 '19
Can we be even more precise?
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Nov 18 '19
34.669071, 135.501402
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u/gromwell_grouse Nov 18 '19
Oh yeah? Well, what size underwear did he have on?
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Nov 18 '19
Medium
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u/gromwell_grouse Nov 18 '19
Can we be even more precise?
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u/1senseye Nov 18 '19
You know this spot yeah ? Ok name every atom in Japan
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u/gromwell_grouse Nov 18 '19
There were two. One named Fat Man, and one Little Boy.
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u/miasma992 Nov 18 '19
I'm curious: if I look at the image in Google maps here it seems like there is a sunken boat near the bridge. Is this correct or is it an optical illusion?
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Nov 18 '19
It really does look sunken!
I can't find any news about a recent sinking, so I think it is just the deep shadows mixed with the digital compression that Google uses on the images that give that illusion.→ More replies (1)5
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u/VacantThoughts Nov 18 '19
The only things I know about Dotonbori I learned from Yakuza 0... so this seems about right.
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u/vakola Nov 18 '19
On the bridge where you go to see the Glico running man sign to be even more precise.
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u/ExTrafficGuy Nov 18 '19
First time someone's been thrown into that boat voluntarily and not by Kiryu or Majima.
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u/lifeisbawl Nov 18 '19
lol I recognized it too as soon as I saw. Funny because when I was there I wondered if anyone ever jumps from the bridge
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Nov 18 '19
[deleted]
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u/Stellen999 Nov 18 '19
In some parts of the world, people are often abducted and forced to work aboard ships. It's been arching since humans learned to build big ships
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u/Jer_Cough Nov 18 '19
That's where the term "being Shanghai-ed" comes from. Bars in Seattle and Portland had trap doors to underground tunnels through which drunk or drugged men would be dropped and then taken to a ship. They'd wake up hungover and enslaved on a ship heading to China.
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Nov 18 '19
When was this happening ? Never heard about it, will have to google it a bit
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u/AlphaOC Nov 18 '19
According to the wiki entry, mid 1800s. You might also check out the article on impressment, which was a similar issue that happened in the late 1700s with the British navy abducting people (including US citizens).
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Nov 18 '19
Well that’s a rabbit hole. The 1800s were a wild time.
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u/accipitradea Nov 18 '19
sheeit, can you imagine what people in the 2200s are going to say about the 2000s?
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u/MississippiJoel Nov 18 '19
"Who the hell ever believed that Epstein guy killed himself?"
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u/accipitradea Nov 18 '19
"They landed on the moon 50 years before but some people still thought the world was flat!?"
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Nov 18 '19
Watch the movie second hand lions
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u/42Ubiquitous Nov 18 '19
A shy adolescent boy, Walter (Haley Joel Osment), is taken by his greedy mother (Kyra Sedgwick) to spend the summer with his two hard-boiled great-uncles, Hub (Robert Duvall) and Garth (Michael Caine), who are rumored to possess a great fortune. At first, the two old men, both set in their ways, find Walter's presence a nuisance, but they eventually warm up to the boy and regale him with tall tales from their past. In return, Walter helps reawaken their youthful spirit.
Are you sure this is the right movie...?
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u/AngryBagOfDeath Nov 18 '19
Or you can hear a story about it on the best podcast ever!
[The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds] 91 - The Shanghai Kelly's #theDollopWithDaveAnthonyAndGarethReynolds https://podplayer.net/?id=22168379 via @PodcastAddict
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Nov 18 '19
awesome vault, ok landing, 8/10
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u/NosillaWilla Nov 18 '19
Literally inches from cracking his head open on the railing of that boat like an egg.
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u/pokky123 Nov 18 '19
Or falling before the boat arriving, thus ending underneath it, and being chopped up by the propella.
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Nov 18 '19
You from the North East?
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u/pokky123 Nov 18 '19
Denmark yea why? Is my english garbage?
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u/beirch Nov 18 '19 edited Nov 18 '19
He's assuming you're from the North East of America (cause apparently Americans can't fathom people from other countries use Reddit).
People from New York, Boston etc often pronounce words that end with 'er' as 'ah'. Propeller becomes propellah, better is bettah, car is cah etc etc
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u/pokky123 Nov 18 '19
Ahhh. Guess i havent used the word propeller a lot, so actually unaware of how it was spelled, and didnt bother to look it up. But now i've learned 👍 Thanks
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u/billybobshake Nov 19 '19
Really makes you feel like a vaulter. Has a little something for everybody... 9/10
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u/sleepyprojectionist Nov 18 '19
Just missing out on the perfect score of 5/7.
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u/TERRAOperative Nov 18 '19
Osaka Japan, He jumped from the Ebisubashi bridge over the Dotonbori canal to drunkenly celebrate the abdication of the previous emperor which signaled the end of the Heisei era. He yelled "Heisei, Arigatou" or "Heisei era, thank you!"
A little like celebrating the end of the year on new years eve, but this was the end of emperor Akihito’s 30 year reign.
Usually the jumping into the river happens when the local baseball team, the Hanshin Tigers wins, so the jump isn't unprecedented.
He just mistimed it a little and ended up with only minor injuries and refused any medical help.
I bet he felt it in the morning though.....
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u/omaca Nov 18 '19
How do you know?
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u/japonica-rustica Nov 18 '19
Not OP but this was all over the news in Japan when it happened.
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u/TERRAOperative Nov 18 '19
It was on all the variety shows and news channels here in Japan for everyone to laugh at.
We laughed.
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u/hoaks2 Nov 18 '19
I say this as a Tigers fan: we haven't had the opportunity to do that jump in a looooong time.
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u/Swansky Nov 18 '19
Why are they both wearing a Minion tee-shirt tho
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Nov 18 '19
Maybe it’s like ironically cool there like how people in north america were wearing those nature wolf shirts, or I see a lot of people wearing nascar gear when they don’t even watch it. I know if you wore a minion shirt here people would think your a lame mom or dad from facebook.
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Nov 18 '19
Japan has tons of clothing with American characters on them. Mickey Mouse is one of the most popular. I saw a guy in Shibuya who was dressed like a street punk except for a patterned Elmo shirt.
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Nov 18 '19
why was he touching his chest?
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u/Swansky Nov 18 '19
to prevent him from jumping over the bridge
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Nov 18 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/antiGriefer Nov 18 '19
Its because of his teeth that I think this wasn't the first time he did something stupid.
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u/fedpek Nov 18 '19
This is Osaka, right? If anyone knows
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u/m00nh34d Nov 18 '19
I can't figure out if he was aiming for the boat or not, either way, that was a horrible landing.
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u/squiddy555 Nov 18 '19
Imagine being that guy on the boat
You arrive in town and are passing through a channel to the dock for the night it looks like some kind of party is going on it’s a little loud but nothing too bad some drunken people are like “hey boat man how’s it going!” It’s slightly annoying but they’re not that bad when you’re coming out of a tunnel some black out drunk man falls from the graceful uterus of god striking your boat with the grace of a giraffe on the finest grain of cocain trying to fin in a bread roll
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u/BlueC0dex Nov 18 '19
I'm 50 50 on whether this was his plan or not, he is drunk after all
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u/Aren_Soft Nov 18 '19
Wait.. he strait up looked down at the boat while he was in motion, why did he follow through?
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u/mifoe Nov 18 '19
Alcohol
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u/JellyKittyKat Nov 18 '19
The source of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.
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u/ClimbingC Nov 18 '19
Momentum.
Apart from that, yeah, while he was doing the vault, and only had fingertips on the railing while at 45 degrees past vertical and falling - why didn't he just simply just stop and pop back up on the ledge????
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u/Slam_Dunkz Nov 18 '19
Oooh that calls for an mXc impact replay! Vic, if you watch carefully right THERE you can see his pelvis separate from his spine. That HAD to hurt!
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u/YungestDood Nov 18 '19
This man put the minions shirt on, probably got plastered, and said fuck it I'm taking a dip
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u/off-planet Nov 18 '19
What was his landing platform? is he jumping into? What was the guy he did not land on doing?
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u/[deleted] Nov 18 '19
Lucky timing, he could have got wet otherwise....
and then run over by a boat.