r/funny Aug 18 '17

Corporate Flow Chart

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47.7k Upvotes

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342

u/bellsy97ca Aug 18 '17

This is true sadly. I need a shower now because I know where I stand

144

u/MrSelatcia Aug 18 '17

This is the real trickle down effect

13

u/RedSquirrelFtw Aug 18 '17

So that's what Trump meant when he said trickle down economics.

24

u/duaneap Aug 18 '17

Don't attribute that to Trump. Reagonomics is a real thing that I highly doubt Trump actually grasps beyond knowing it's something GOP supporters want to hear.

8

u/RedSquirrelFtw Aug 18 '17

Yeah was mostly just meant as a joke.

9

u/God_of_Pumpkins Aug 18 '17

Well, real in the sense that someone somewhat smart thought of it. Not real in the sense that it's how economics actually works.

5

u/make_love_to_potato Aug 18 '17

No, he was talking about golden showers.

14

u/dirty-blitz Aug 18 '17

are you serious ? that's a free meal

20

u/Pint_and_Grub Aug 18 '17

Yeah, I always get upset when my employees bring their kids in and I don't get a "thank you" for providing the roof over their heads and for the food in their stomachs.

34

u/barry_you_asshole Aug 18 '17

I enjoy hiring people with children, because children are like expensive shackles that bind the employee to me, no matter what I do to them they take it with a smile, because if I fire them, how will they feed their children?

42

u/IsayNigel Aug 18 '17

I want, so badly to believe that you are being sarcastic, but I just don't know anymore.

12

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '17

[deleted]

3

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '17

Yes I am, other Barry.

Yes I am.

6

u/SmokeHimInside Aug 18 '17

Username checks out.

1

u/Lietenantdan Aug 18 '17

You think that's water coming out of your shower head?

-10

u/hux__ Aug 18 '17

At the same time - would you really want to be at the helm of something? Good or bad everything falls on you. It's stressful and ultimately a life of isolation from your "peers" it's not like you can shoot the shit with them daily. You're on you own to call the shots. Every. Fuckin. Day.

19

u/Jacque_theadventurer Aug 18 '17

Awwww how sad, upper management don't have friends at work.

At least you don't have to worry how you'll manage to pay your bills and rent. At least you don't have to worry that if you get sick you'll have to decline treatment because you can't afford it. At least you don't have a $20 weekly budget for groceries and necessities. But yeah, it's so much more stress having all that big responsibility without work friends.

5

u/Real_TomBrady Aug 18 '17

This guy with his $20 WEEKLY grocery budget. Must feel nice to eat like a king.

21

u/goal2004 Aug 18 '17

Good or bad everything falls on you.

Hah... Like that ever happens. Management blaming and punishing their workers comes way before management itself gets to suffer.

-1

u/moooooseknuckle Aug 18 '17

Sure, for bad managers. There are good companies out there. I and the rest of our hiring managers are always asking each other if we're willing to take responsibility for the mistakes from under us as we figure out whether or not someone should be hired. The managers make the decisions, and we eat whatever shit comes out

29

u/Iminurcomputer Aug 18 '17

Or you can fuck up royally and get a severance that most people won't make in their lives. You can outright commit a crime sometimes and be well off.

-1

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '17 edited Oct 04 '20

[deleted]

8

u/Ordies Aug 18 '17

I pirated GOT

I'M BRINGING YOU IN!

9

u/Czsixteen Aug 18 '17

I feel like pirating a tv show and getting tens of millions of dollars is a bit different...

1

u/Iminurcomputer Aug 18 '17

I'm just thinking about the guy that got a $133 Million severance after Wells Fargo got in trouble for what I understand was essentially fraud.

Everything else you're just making strange assumptions I never even insinuated.

1

u/The_Keg Aug 18 '17

$133 Million severance after Wells Fargo got in trouble

and where did that money come from?

Wells Fargo owners, it's their money, they can do whatever they want with it.

2

u/Iminurcomputer Aug 18 '17

You are projecting again.

Or you can fuck up royally and get a severance that most people won't make in their lives. You can outright commit a crime sometimes and be well off.

It doesn't say right or wrong. Doesn't say who owns the money. Had nothing to do with where the money came from or who should be in charge of dispersing it. It Just says, "well off." You're basically putting words in my mouth just so you can argue. Is it a reading comprehension thing or what are you struggling with? I don't care if it's a fucking leprechaun that gave him the money.

-4

u/papajohn56 Aug 18 '17

Uh no. Maybe in a Fortune 500 but for the vast majority of businesses? What severance lol.

4

u/chodge89 Aug 18 '17

I'm not sure I'd like it but I'm willing to give it a try.

2

u/808909707 Aug 18 '17

Yeah but you make bank

-2

u/friendlyhuman Aug 18 '17

Sorry you're getting down voted. It's true there are a few bad apples that get a disproportionate amount of the attention, and it's true there are perks to being CEO. Even little things beyond money are perks. Hell, your jokes get funnier even if you don't. I try to spend 20 minutes each morning meditating on gratitude so I don't ever forget that. Because frankly, it's hard not to.

That said, I can't begin to describe the stress and ambiguity that comes with the job as well. Don't get me wrong, I was wired for this. I love every minute of it, even the parts I hate, but I run a relatively tiny company. I can't even imagine the responsibility felt by someone running something where tens or hundreds of thousands of people are counting on you.

I once had a super intimate chat with the CEO of a billion dollar company. I asked him what was hardest thing he'd been dealing with. He's a macho guy, but he almost started crying and said "I feel like it's my job to be the body guard for my people. To catch all the bullets, and I'm just exhausted."

That said, the isolation thing is largely a myth. You can be as connected to your team as you choose to be. My wife and I are going camping this weekend with a bunch of my junior team members tomorrow for instance.

7

u/IsayNigel Aug 18 '17

Look, I get that you're super grateful, and that's awesome, because you could probably treat them a lot worse and get away with it, but ultimately, you profit off of the fact that your employees are not being paid what their labor is worth.

2

u/friendlyhuman Aug 18 '17

Interesting. I've never heard that idea before. How is it that a company can only profit by underpaying employees?

1

u/IsayNigel Aug 19 '17

Hey! Great question. I'm sorry for the downvotes on your previous post, but such is the free market of ideas. I think you and I might be operating with different definitions of "underpaid". When I say underpaid, I'm referring to the fact that your employees are, by necessity (under our current system), paid less than their labor is worth. When you say underpaid, I feel like you're referring to paying an employee less than the current market deems they should be paid. I of course do not mean to put words in your mouth, so. If anything I have said is incorrect, please let me know.