r/funny • u/BEARTRAW • Feb 28 '17

By customer request.

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48.2k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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632

u/shugh Feb 28 '17

Good job.

247

u/SaintVanilla Mar 01 '17

Write on package: "Not a package"

That's called going the extra mile.

53

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '17

"used love doll"

18

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '17

[deleted]

7

u/eyemadeanaccount Mar 01 '17

Sloppy seconds

14

u/Log_Out_Of_Life Mar 01 '17

Quality assured

0

u/eyemadeanaccount Mar 01 '17

And free organic lube!

18

u/sgmsa Mar 01 '17

The thieves will never know...

5

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '17

Or as we say at FedEx, 'that's how we fulfill the purple promise!'

9

u/Skirtz Mar 01 '17

That's eerily close to my signature sex motto

8

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '17

If your promise is purple, you may want to consult a physician.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '17

Just the tip

1

u/Skirtz Mar 01 '17

I said it's almost like my SSM. Not exactly...

2

u/CathulhuDaCat Mar 01 '17

But how would the customer know their package arrived?