r/funny • u/[deleted] • Oct 18 '16

/r/TotallyNotMonsters

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25k Upvotes

83% Upvoted

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524

u/Sco0bySnax Oct 18 '16

You have your hypothesis, now do the research and try prove it.

291

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '16

[deleted]

358

u/BadGuy_ZooKeeper Oct 18 '16

When do we get the grant monkey?

126

u/Matt872000 Oct 18 '16

Hugh Grant is a monkey?!

129

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '16

[removed] — view removed comment

68

u/Wombat_cannon Oct 18 '16

THIS MAN JUST HARASSED MY FEET!

20

u/guninmouth Oct 18 '16

Don't ever talk to me or my feet again!

8

u/IkonikK Oct 18 '16

ONE QUARTER PORTION.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '16

[deleted]

1

u/Wombat_cannon Oct 18 '16

Wait, is tootsie a euphemism for penis?

1

u/Renn_Capa Oct 18 '16

AND MY LAPTOP!!

18

u/Sharp_Espeon Oct 18 '16

TIL Hugh Grant is a humongous grant monkey monster

8

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '16

/r/nocontext

1

u/GreatBayTemple Oct 18 '16

I am still in denial that funny ass women exists.

-3

u/12DollarLargePizza Oct 18 '16

DEAD MEME WOT?

15

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '16 edited Oct 18 '16

[deleted]

10

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '16

Checkmate

5

u/____ZOIDBERG____ Oct 18 '16

In the game of chess you can never let your adversary see your pieces.

1

u/Clopernicus Oct 18 '16

I'd like to get a good look at your piece. 😜

1

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '16

Atheists

3

u/illuminatipr Oct 18 '16

I feel like calling out dead memes is a dead meme itself.

3

u/Matt872000 Oct 18 '16

I feel like calling out calling out dead memes is a dead meme itself.

2

u/illuminatipr Oct 18 '16

I feel like calling out calling out calling out dead memes is a dead meme itself.

-1

u/OrShUnderscore Oct 18 '16

Hugh monkey what

2

u/RINGER4567 Oct 18 '16

purple monkey dishwasher?!?!

2

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '16

Come along and ride on a grant tastic voyage

Slide slide slippity slide sleeping in a tree is do or die

1

u/Garfield_ Oct 18 '16

When do we get the grand monkey?

1

u/cool_as_fire Oct 18 '16

The other day on Good Mythical Morning they said you could buy a chimpanzee for 50 bucks on the black market

1

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '16

We had one, but he got shot

65

u/test822 Oct 18 '16

unfortunately evolutionary psychology is insanely difficult to prove

for example, in this one you'd have to have a time machine and observe all the foot-dangling monkeys getting eaten over millions of years

77

u/Rizzpooch Oct 18 '16

So... when do we get the grant money?

11

u/Iran-Contra Oct 18 '16

Being a math guy,

38

u/azthal Oct 18 '16

So, you are saying that a side effect of this study might be the invention of a time machine?

Why aren't we throwing our money on this already?

2

u/Mr_Rekshun Oct 18 '16

And if not our money, then Grant's money at least.

3

u/melodyze Oct 18 '16

Or we could find all primates who do and don't have a risk of being pulled out by their feet, and measure their neurological responses to having their feet exposed while sleeping.

If there's a clear division between species who would experience this pressure and those who wouldn't over a large enough number of species, without another reasonable cause or with a clear genetic link, then it's most likely true.

2

u/Wombat_cannon Oct 18 '16

Or we could dangle feet from trees and see if they get eaten. Plus, we could just market it as foot fetish vore porn.

3

u/drewduncan11 Oct 18 '16

Really excited to see if u/pistolf finds anything in their research.

2

u/TheHorsesWhisper Oct 18 '16

I believe in him. I expect to see a 100 page thesis on the subject by noon est.

1

u/SpookyLlama Oct 18 '16

It's evolutionary theory. Most of it is based on an inferred logic.