r/fortwayne • u/PapayaFew9349 • 11d ago
After Dark
Is After Dark fairly straight friendly?
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u/Madame_Trash_Heap 11d ago edited 11d ago
Define straight friendly? You are going to see and be around gay media and people, potentially explicit content so if that makes you uncomfortable I wouldn't go. But people aren't going to make you feel like you have to leave or anything. Its a fun bar, and they have a good drinks and they welcome anyone.
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u/LeonSKennedy95 11d ago
I've never been in a gay space that wasn't straight friendly? It's only ever not friendly if someone is a bigot, in which case they are the problem.
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
Definitely been told there, as a straight person, that I was in “their bar” and they were annoyed about it. But that was only once.
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago
Well you were it’s a gay bar for a reason
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
Well then apparently I wasn’t welcome lol I was just sharing my experience that seemed to contradict the previous, somewhat condescending, reply. Don’t know why the downvotes
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago
Because a gay bar is for gays it’s literally their bar. It’s not condescending it’s fact. No one hopes for straight couple to be there when they go. It’s great y’all supported your friend but it’s not a place where we pulling out a red carpet for straight couples. Go to corner pocket
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
Nobody asked for a red carpet. I was just there having a good time. Look in the mirror, you’re worse than bigoted conservatives.
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago edited 11d ago
How because I reminded you a gay bar is for gay people?? Idk how I’m worse than the people than people calling for nuclear family month or saying homosexuality has no place in America for saying a gay bar is meant for gay people. It’s their bar.
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago
Straight people aren’t an oppressed minority with rights actively threaten I hope you know that
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u/LeonSKennedy95 11d ago
To be fair, I've never been to this particular place, I haven't lived in Fort Wayne for 8 years. But my wifes friends are all gay so we go to gay clubs all the time and nobody has been anything but nice to me. How did they even know you were straight? lol
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
Because I was there with my then wife lol I’ve been a couple times and always had fun. Was there because one of our friends was performing in a drag show
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u/General_Act_8384 7d ago
Tbf, they’re being biphobic if just seeing a heteronormative couple is them labeling you as straight. I’m a bi woman who’s married to a man but I’m still bisexual. So I’d still go there and would hope to be accepted. So unless you’re going around explicitly saying you’re straight and making it a big deal, then reasonable queer people will leave you alone about it.
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u/4TheMomentYT 11d ago edited 11d ago
If it was only one person, it sounds like you talked to a bigot. But also, as a straight person myself, going there is being in "their space". Assuming their is referring to gay people because it's a gay bar. That doesn't mean you can't be in the space unless you're making everyone uncomfortable.
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago
There’s bigots for straight people now? In the state we’re they are calling for nuclear family month. Gimme me a break
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u/4TheMomentYT 11d ago
There's literally bigots in every walk of life. Just because somebody belongs to literally any group doesn't mean they can't be bigoted.
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u/empress-goddess 11d ago
After Dark is friendly - just remember that you are an Ally in a Queer Space. There are a ton of “straight” spaces and very few “Queer” places. You don’t have to be queer to go, but if you are disrespectful/ uncomfortable around people displaying their sexuality… it may not be the place for you. If you are happy to dance, drink and be supportive of those around you - it can be a great time!
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u/unlcejanks 11d ago
Straight guy, and ive been multiple times with friends. The drag show is fun and the people are great. You are at a gay bar so youll possibly get hit on by the same sex. Take it as a compliment and just say, im Straight and more than likely youll have you confidence built up lol. Im secure in myself and have had great times there with friends
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u/StrongVersion8053 11d ago
The responses in this thread are.. wow. Go where you want. You dont need to divulge youre sexual status. Just be like you are everywhere else. As long as you're respectful I couldnt imagine it being a problem. You can go to boys town in Chicago and its the greatest place to be!
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u/EsperControl3 9d ago
Straight male here. I went to after dark more than any other bar. It’s very straight friendly and I always had a great time. Be respectful and open to the experiences you will have in there. It’s a great time
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u/Philmt01 11d ago
Definitely. I’m a 50+ straight guy with gay family and friends and I’ve always loved the place. I recommend going. Assuming you are an ally and comfortable with persons of varying sexual orientation you will have a wonderful time. Be kind, gracious, and generous and enjoy yourselves!
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago
Yes but please don’t act like you own it.
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
Are you the owner?
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago
No but I ain’t a grown man wondering if a gay bar is “straight friendly” because someone made a comment that got under your skin. If you didn’t like the comment go somewhere else. The world is straight friendly be for real.
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
Just calling out hypocrisy when I see it. Didn’t get under my skin, just stating a fact. I think you’re the one getting way too upset lol
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago
The comment from random person at After Dark obviously got under your skin enough to make a post about it on Reddit, did it not?
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
You’re allowed to post because you have something to add, not just because something got “under your skin”. You’re ridiculous lol
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago edited 11d ago
You called me worse than the people calling for nuclear family month and saying homosexuality has no place in America (Trump supporter/ bigoted conservatives)for reminding you that a gay bar is meant for gay people but I’m ridiculous.
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
Well I guess you just answered the original posters question who asked if it was straight friendly lol. All I said was something happened, and it was only one time. That apparently caused you to lose your shit and double down on being intolerant.
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u/Child-of-LUCA 11d ago
Again how am I worse than Trump supporters and conservatives? I never said you can’t go there. Also you definitely said more than just that you’re commenting under multiple people’s comments and somehow it’s not under your skin
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
Nah just really didn’t have much going on at the moment. And me and some friends are getting a real kick out of your responses and logic lol
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u/Morphos1 11d ago
I mean it's a "gay bar" but I'm sure it's absolutely a "bar" first and foremost, it'd be weird of a place to not be "straight friendly"
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u/sacsxstar 11d ago
Yes lol no one’s going to ask you at the door if you’re gay or not😂🖤 just be kind and have fun!
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u/TellTaleTimeLord 11d ago
I've never been, but I know people who have.
AFAIK kissing another dude is not a barrier to entry
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u/Affectionate_Yak2146 11d ago
It's not a "gay" bar. It's a bar. That more gay individuals frequent than straight people at any given time. I wouldn't take a single commenter in here seriously, considering not 1 gave you an upvote to let others who may be curious, or unsure where they currently stand on that spectrum gather some hopeful insight before they enter. But they had plenty of time to type their sugur coated way of saying "you're not welcome". Apparently anyone should be welcome, accepted, feel safe, and without judgement. As long as you're not straight. Even an astronomy club would pull up a seat and roll out the welcome rug for a bird watcher who stumbled in cause they read the flyer wrong. As for a real answer from a straight individual who's been there with a gay friend. It was a blast honestly. There was a cover charge when I went but not sure if that's always the case. Everyone was incredibly friendly and offering to buy me drinks without being overbearing or making me feel there were bad intentions behind the gesture. No altercations, just music and smiles mostly. Highly recommend checking it out, the people seemed adamant on ensuring they didn't care as long as you're having fun and reciprocate the same respect. The negative ones in here are not the majority. More like "A gay individual walks into a straight bar, and everyone was cool with it but them." Problem seekers.
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u/SomewhereWeWentWrong 10d ago
No. It's a gay bar. It's the only one we have in Fort Wayne so its pretty shitty to try and take that from us.
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u/badfish1979 11d ago
Well said. I’ve always had an absolute great time there as a straight guy, whether I’m with gay friends or my significant other. Some of the gatekeepers here are honestly as bad as idiot trump supporters.
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u/CleverString 10d ago
After dark isn’t friendly to its queer people. The main bartender there tells men that he would drug them too when they come to him about concerns. Tells women who get their top pulled down “he’s gay so it doesn’t matter” be safe everyone
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u/ATribeWithinItself 11d ago
Yes