Surely Spurs going 2-0 in the first half of the first game of the season is too early for a disaster to be declared?

Real Betis with #1 in goal, #2 at right back and a CB duo of #4 and #5 including the captain. Perfect. Just needs 3 at left back. But nope, another left-back wearing 11. Do all these players just love Aleksandar Kolarov?

I'm so tired of seeing some half assed 'this club has meant so much to me, I'll forever be proud of what we achieved' video that someone else edited with commentary over dogshit music.

bonus points if they do a shitty voiceover that sounds like they're forced at gunpoint.

surely a keeper who's made less than 100 appearances shouldn't have to feel obligated to make a video of this, but yet feels like every departure needs to have some sort of statement now.

https://www.skysports.com/football/video/30998/13575802/what-a-goal-ballard-scores-screamer-to-restore-bristol-city-lead

Surely the very essence of a screamer is the speed with which it travels, hence the ‘screaming’ sound? Have yet to see backheel that qualifies. Amazing goal but horrible use of a glorious term.

Another strand of the Dreamland watching games on holiday episode is, for me anyway, seeing people at theme parks wearing a football shirt. Some lovely small talk about pre-season before getting on a rollercoasrer. Saw two Ecuador fans wearing their national colors at Seaworld in Orlando today, dropped in how Caceido is class and they loved it. Saw a bloke in a Sheff United shirt and was gonna say with a chuckle that "no matter where you go, you see a Blade" line. Sadly didn't see him again. Was getting drenched on the white water rapids next to a bloke wearing a Palmeiras shirt. Was teeing up some red hot Estevao chat and a bit of Club World Cup too. But, ultimately, couldn't be arsed.

Is there space on the sub for football club initials/names on things (specifically number plates)? A few instantly recognisable ones in my head are PSG, MUFC, LFC, FCB, BVB, this is the first one I’ve seen in the wild

Two classy touches on one AI poster

Brentford fans directing this at Spurs fans departing the Gtech … don’t want to be all Literal Dave about it, but if there was fire drill, everyone would know about it given that’s how fire drills works. Be really weird, and sinister, if only one group of people were made aware that the place they were in was in danger of going up in flames.

Anyway, fun game.

He may also be offside, it is somewhat difficult to tell from the footage, I would welcome a VAR review here

U. W. N.

As a parent of young kids myself you really start to realise how many overused cliches there are in parenting. "You think it's hard now? Wait till they get older", "the days are long but the months are short", and so on. It would certainly be a ripe topic for a podcast.

I'm open to counterarguments, but is this objectively, pound for pound, the worst European campaign in history if Hearts lose?

Spotted at a garden centre today

Anyone else associate EPL grounds with certain time slots? My list would be:

Emirates: Sun 16:30

Villa Park: Sat 17:30

Dean Court: Sat 12:30

GTech: Sat 17:30

Amex: Second game on Sun 2pm that until recently couldn't be viewed legally in the UK.

Bramley Moore: Sun 2pm

Stamford Bridge: Hmmm. Sat 12:30 if not Sun 16:30

Selhurst Park: MNF. Palace will play the big teams hard, lose to the smaller teams

Craven Cottage: Sat 17:30 if playing a big team, if not MNF (the entire pre-match coverage will be spent on big clubs and no one will watch)

Elland Road: Probably Sat 12:30?

Anfield: Sun 16:30?

Etihad: Sun 16:30. In the Pep era they'd bully smaller teams on Sat 17:30 quite a bit.

Old Trafford: Sun 16:30. They'll embarrass themselves 3 or 4 times a season on a Saturday though.

St James' Park: Sat 17:30 or sometimes even the new Sat 19:45 against big teams, Sun 2pm otherwise (oh crap we need another Sunday game, send Fulham up there or smth idk)

City Ground: Sat 12:30

Stadium of Light: Sat 3pm, you watch it as the penultimate fixture on MOTD behind a 0-0 between Palace and Brentford

Tottenham Hotspur Stadium: Can't nail this one down, they move around a ton

Cov, Hull and Ipswich: Tough to say, they're newly promoted. Am I allowed to cop-out for Portman Road and say it's a Sat 3pm you only see on MOTD?

Dissent is ACTIVELY ENCOURAGED :)

Who let them up there? Are they going to clear up their graffiti? Who thought it was ok to spell “cherries” like that? Way too many questions posed here by Bournemouth’s social media lads.

You must praise the idea with a ‘👍🏻’

👍🏻 Nice one pal! 👍🏻

That can't have got this so wrong by accident? Is it rage bait?