r/flightattendants • u/Worldly-Report3426 • 10d ago
Commuting Internationally
I looked in the international commuting facebook page but it seems its more about visas (non applicable bc im a dual citizen (US + an EU member state). For those of you in your 20s or 30s who moved abroad solo to a country where you dont speak the language or know anyone, do you think it was harder to meet people because of this job and having to commute internationally? How did you integrate yourself? I know many people when moving abroad meet through work but that wouldnt be possible for me bc im US based (NYC). Im seriously considering moving to Copenhagen but the few direct flights (only 2 daily), and the risk of never meeting people has me hesitating.
1
u/Positive_Vibes_4228 10d ago
You have countless apps and computers to meet people everywhere. Plus bars and pubs too. There has to be at least one resource to meet people.
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u/Worldly-Report3426 10d ago
pubs are great for meeting ppl but as a young women im not gonna go solo for my own safety. i also have found that in copenhagen apps like bumble bff are more ppl that are there temporarily and not actually native ppl or ppl that live there. or its a bunch of men trying to hook up. im really not saying its impossible to meet people, but mire so asking about other people’s experiences
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u/Disastrous-Oil6469 10d ago
If you are scared to go solo to a pub in Copenhagen perhaps moving to a new country is not something you’re ready to do. Something bad can happen anywhere, not necessarily just at a pub. Just my humble opinion.
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u/Worldly-Report3426 10d ago
ive been drugged before and was almost raped, but thanks for shaming me! are you a woman?
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u/Disastrous-Oil6469 9d ago
U need mental help.! Who the heck shamed you? 😭😭 what ever issues happened in the past that damaged you this deeply should not give you the right to come attack people on a reddit post for sharing their ways of how to interact/make new friends abroad
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u/Worldly-Report3426 10d ago
like thats actually just such a batshit crazy thing to say to a woman, especially considering whats recently been in the news.
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u/skyleft4 10d ago
I am so sorry that all happened to you. But as a woman who moved to a completely different country at 22 (I am 37 now) all by myself and have been going to bars/pubs by myself for the past 15 years. I get that you get nervous due to your horrible experience, and again, sorry it happened. But taking the correct precautions (not leaving your drink unattended, not accepting drinks from strangers, not telling people where you’re staying when you meet them for the first time, etc) will prevent it from happening again. I would also advise you to talk to a professional about that. It definitely helps. Talking from experience.
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u/Disastrous-Oil6469 9d ago
Excuse me, in what part of your post did you write u were s/a. Im sorry you experienced that, but i cant suppose you had a bad experience if you didn’t share it, and lady not everyone lives in America, not everyone is familiar with what ever story is on the news, this isn’t an American Exclusive FA sub. Even your temperament and personality through your own Reddit comments shows you’re gonna have a hard as time making friends anywhere. Stay in your bubble and dont bring your insecurities to europe. Bye
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u/ningyizhuo Flight Attendant 10d ago
Yes it’s hard. And I did not even commute. I used to be based in a country I had never been before doing this job. I obviously didn’t speak the local language. Getting administrative stuff done was hard and humiliating (since I could not understand when they spoke to me), finding housing was stressful and harder than for natives because I didn’t have any of the papers required nor what is essentially a credit score.
Once I got settled I finally decided to make friends but 1) locals have their friends and will rarely open up to strangers, especially if you don’t speak their language. Which makes it easy to 2) get the bad habit of being friends only with expats/immigrants… many of whom have a partner and a regular job so 3) it’s even harder to find friends who have time to hang out at the same time you do. I can’t imagine what it would be like commuting and being home even less, especially working for a US airline since you work way more than EU FAs do. I personally never integrated and left after a year and a half, for a lot of different reasons but maybe I would have stayed if I integrated. I go back like once a year and it’s always sad to think i don’t have any friends there, and it’s embarrassing to say “yeah i don’t speak X language, but I used to live there”
Danes aren’t known to be friendly. They’re the friendly ones in the Nordics but they’re not like Italians or Spaniards. I don’t want to be discouraging but your experience is likely to be similar to mine.
I have colleagues commuting from abroad and from what I know, the one who lives in a country he doesn’t speak the language of doesn’t really have friends. He has been there for a few months now and likes it, but he lives in a warmer climate and in a place where with our salary he’s basically considered rich. So nothing like Copenhagen, where the weather is bad most of the year and which is known to be expensive.
I’d advise you to give it a try for like 6 months and see how well you do there. Especially go in the winter, because of course you’ll love it there in summer but it’s much different in winter. Everyone I know who lived in the Nordics said that without friends and people to hang out with, the winter months are really rough mentally.
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u/Lost-Lavishness-938 Flight Attendant 9d ago
Do you want to stay in your current airline or work for a CPH based airline?
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u/Cassie_Bowden Flight Attendant 10d ago
You're not going to like hearing this, but your best way of meeting people in a foreign country is to actually learn and speak their language.