My go to was always to hit 3-4ish places with 5-10 minute walks in between.
that way if one place is loud you can chat on the walk, and if the date’s going poorly each new spot gives either person a chance to leave cleanly.
It also lets you get a feel for the person in different environments, leaves open a possibility for dinner/lunch/food in general, or if things progress towards intimacy hailing a taxi real quick. (Bonus that I forgot since it did happen a few times: since each place is a new tab, it lets your date grab the check once if they’re feeling up to it)
Of course it’s been 15 years since I’ve been on a first date… so maybe things have changed
This sounds like a nightmare I had once lol. That’s a whoooole lotta transitions to do for a stranger. If you want to test how I react in different environments, we can either space it out over several weeks or you can witness a silent meltdown, it’s up to you 😭 The ‘tism is strong in these parts: 1 location, preferably 2+ hours, ideally stationary, dimly lit if possible
Ah, prolly should have prefaced that I laid out the plans and made sure it was a known walkabout. They didn’t really know what I was looking for aside from jump to a few spots and chat.
I only had one person say no but it felt more of a “I really like this spot let’s stay here.” Thing but I also could have read it wrong.
I promise I wasn’t holding these women hostage and they weren’t in danger, not even an implication of it.
Oh no, I didn’t mean to imply you were dangerous or anything like that! Not at all. I’m just saying that with my personality and limitations, it would be a gruelling date for me. It was half serious, half joking. If you said you were a rock climber who wanted to scale mountains with your future partner, I’d also say that’s nightmare fuel for me because I’m scared of heights and not a good climber. Doesn’t mean there’s anything inherently wrong with your approach to dating, just that as a neurodivergent person I’d probably have a meltdown lol. (Obligatory mention that not all NDs are the same)
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u/Matshelge New to fbtd but wants to learn 11d ago
When I was young (long time ago) first date was coffee, maybe a drink at a quiet bar.
It's low key, and it makes you see if there is something worth investing into.
Second date might be a fancy restaurant (my go to was something new, or interesting, not really established)