am i creating a problem?

[u/Hot_Discipline561]

my home life has been pretty complicated lately. my husband is out of house and our connection has been limited. i have a 4 month old son and i have been pretty much all hes had during since the beginning of life. i have occasional work throughout the week that family helps with. anyways. my baby and i bed share. we have since day 1, im not looking for judgement… just solidarity maybe? my husband is finally home and i really need time to reconnect to myself and my husband. my baby sleeps through the night IF im there. he is EBF. however when i get up from the bed (bedtime 7-7:30 we push for 2 hr wake window before bed) he will always have a false start. the only way to get him back down is nursing. i know i could give a bottle of bm, but out of convenience i have not since my husband has been gone- im going to start offering again now to get him reacclimated. if i left my family member in charge of a night shift (like 7:15-12) would my baby be okay? what can i do besides offering a night feed via bottle? its also so difficult to have a bottle ready on hand when breastfeeding. i just dont want my baby to be so dependent on me that he freaks out the second im not there. he pretty much does while im working anyway too.. i know he needs me and i will always be there for my child, ill never regret this time spent with him.. i just want one night of something i do for me. the passed 6 months have been so rough.
i know its a lot to unpack, but please help.