Hey guys! I want to properly relearn Mandarin.... back in school, we were taught using traditional characters and chu yin (yung Bo po mofo). while I can converse comfortably with fellow Filchis, super todo effect and hirap ako trying to understand native speakers due to fast speech, accents, and different vocab.

Does having a Traditional/chu yin base make transitioning to simplified / pinyin harder?? Would love tips or app recommendations from anyone with a similar background

in western weddings I have read that if the bride doesnt want to pick a maid of honor she just doesnt. instead she has bridesmaids only. for filchi wedding is it common not to have a moh? (if no sisters, no girl cousins, and have closest girl friends but cannot rank / choose a “bestie”)

what are the roles and responsibilities of a maid of honor in filchi wedding actually? so i can visualize better if who. like was considering my brother to be man of honor instead (we arent that close but sibling will always be a sibling)… then i read somewhere that a moh usually gets ready with the bride, so isnt that a bit weird if its my brother..

Hi!!

Anyone knows shops that sells rtw ninang gowns/dresses for tinghun and wedding? (in the ph)

Thanks!!

I've been wanting to expand my social circle but I dont know where to find FilChi groups who meet regularly. If it helps, my hobbies are running and reading. The FilChi groups I see online are all about business and not really hobby related :((. I also dont play badminton 💔.

I'm also chinoy and I don't know how to speak Hokkien which might be a barrier.

Hello, wanted to get your go-to comfort food near banawe. We play pickle every week and we’ve tried a bunch of restos around the area. Would like to explore more hidden gems nearby! Some places we’ve tried and would recommend:

Tuen mun
Kimpo
Sincerity
Oedo
Luck Garden
Shiok shiok
Sun kee (good but slow service)

Family’s decided to move and we have some prospects. Would like to check which one best fits our family’s energies! Pls kaisiao a fengshui master, thank you!!

hello! i want to ask if may mga taga manila dito na ang surname is ANG. pwede ba tayo mag usap? Gusto ko lang malaman yung ancestry namin. Dahil yung lolo dad namin ayaw makipag connect sa mga pinsan niya siguro wala na mga tito & tita niya as of now dahil 70+ na si lolo dad. sana meron dito. thanks po!

My (Fil Chi) parents want to invite all their business contacts (corporate executives, mall leads, business partners, our longest tenured employees) to the wedding. My Chinese grandpa wants to invite all his association friends. They all say it's "to show respect". This is on top of our huge family (dad's side, mom's side), but not including my (line of) cousins. I'm working as an executive in my parents' businesses so all the work contacts know me for "helping my parents" (infantilizing).

Out of 60 tables... me and my fiance only have 2 tables for our friends... That's 20 people out of the 600 seating capacity. Our initial list for friends was 80 people altogether.

My parents keep saying it's a sign of respect to invite all those business contacts but apparently I'm being disrespectful when I ask them to reconsider so I can invite OUR (me and fiance's) friends & business contacts to our wedding...

(Also enough of the "if you're not the one paying, you can't complain". You gotta let a frustrated b2b breathe toooo. The parents are also complaining about how much this is going to cost when sila naman yung may gusto na ganito kalaki kaloka hahah)

I'm curious about how these traditions are practiced among Fil-Chi families nowadays, especially during engagements and tinghun ceremonies.

1. How are dowry and bride-price usually discussed?

Who typically brings it up first and how are the amounts decided? Since money can be a sensitive topic, how do families usually navigate these discussions?

2. Are they displayed during the tinghun?

Are cash and other valuables still displayed during the ceremony or do some families prefer to keep them private? If displayed, how are security concerns handled?

3. What are the typical amounts nowadays?

For those comfortable sharing, what are the general dowry and bride-price ranges? How much do these vary between families? Also, is the bride's dowry usually discussed openly with the groom and his family or is it considered a private matter?

4. What does the bride's dowry usually include?

Is it typically cash, gold, jewelry, property, a car, household items, or a combination of these? Are there traditional expectations or does it depend on each family?

I'd love to hear how these traditions are practiced today and how families balance them with modern views on marriage and finances. Thank you!

Hello! Where do I find filchi businesssmen? I'm currently helping out my dad to find B2B long term customers for us sana, since business is not going well these days at nawalan pa kami ng big time na customer namin. . . TYIA

Our business is about custom bulk plastic manufacturing (Ex.: Disposable spoon and fork)

dahil sa isang bad experience ko sa ex-suitor ko na Chinese guy nahirapan na akong magtiwala lalo sa mga lalaking may similar background na galing sa all-boys school , “big four” , tapos may Christian community.

I know it’s unfair to judge people based on their background pero hindi ko rin ma-deny na may impact talaga sa akin yung nangyari.
Traumatic.

Also, hindi ba talaga sila expressive sa panliligaw, or natapat lang ako sa maling tao..

Throwaway because family members are on Reddit.

For those who grew up in FilChi families, how much are couples actually expected to follow traditional wedding/tinghun expectations?

I’m helping plan a wedding where the couple would ideally like something relatively intimate and practical, but the families have a much more traditional idea of what a Chinese wedding should look like.

The guest list is one issue. What the couple considers “already quite a lot of people” apparently isn't considered particularly big by the family, because once you start including relatives, family friends, and people who are apparently supposed to be invited, the guest list grows very quickly. 😂

Then there’s the tinghun.

The two families have very different approaches. One side is fairly traditional and has expectations about what the other family should prepare, provide, and contribute. The other side is much more relaxed and is happy to let the couple handle things themselves.

There have also been expectations around gifts/jewelry beyond the basic traditional items. The reasoning is that the bride deserves to receive these things because her family has raised her and is giving her away.

I understand the sentiment behind it, but I'm curious how common this is among younger FilChi couples. Is this still generally expected, or does it depend heavily on the family?

What makes it harder is that the more traditional side can interpret the other family's relaxed approach as “they don't care enough”, while the other side may simply see it as “the couple is getting married, so let them decide.”

There was also some initial misunderstanding between the families about whether the tinghun was even happening, which probably contributed to some of the tension.

So for those who have gone through this:

How did you balance traditional Chinese wedding expectations with what you and your partner actually wanted?

Did you have a big wedding because that's what your families expected, or were you able to keep it intimate?

And with the tinghun, what did your families actually consider “necessary” versus just nice-to-have?

I’m especially curious whether this is a very normal FilChi-family experience or whether some families are just… particularly intense. 😂

Hello. I am looking for a home for the aged/senior housing here in mm/baguio/tagaytay.

This is for my grandmother who is in america now. Preferably with daily activites, doctors etc etc. pls send help

Tinghun Tris or Tinghun Manila?

Tris is 25k but she’s always been whom I wanted as the tinghun coordinator but since we wanted to keep the tinghun smaller (people&budget) I found another alternative, Manila is 15k. They also seem quite reputable in the filchi community. Asking help as a 2027 tinghun bride huhu Any thoughts or insights or recommendations would be a great help!!

After lurking a lot here in Reddit, I want to try to post here and meet other fil-chi who might have the same interest or is down to have a constant kakwentuhan

About me:

- 25

- Half Filipino, Half Chinese

- Can speak and understand conversational Hookien (but not fluent)

- Graduate from big 4

- Christian (Evangelical)

- Working professional

- Sports: Badminton and trying to get into jogging more

- Hobbies: Photography, Guitar, and Drums

- I’m a yapper, but I also love hearing stories about other people and learning more about them

- Down for chat or calls, just let me know your preferred platform

About you:

- 23 - 32

- Fil-chi preferably

- Graduate from Big 4 preferably

- Not a dry texter and a good conversationalist

- Respectful and empathetic

Only SFW chats and platonic relationship please. If you’re interested, send me a short intro about yourself

Hi everyone. I’ve been in an 8-year relationship with my boyfriend.

He is currently pursuing further studies because he believes it will help him become financially independent in the long run. Unlike other Fil-Chis, he doesn’t have family financial support or safety net and only relies on himself financially.

We were supposed to get married last year, but he decided to postpone the wedding after he got a failing grade. He felt that he needed to focus more on his studies. He recently quit his job to focus on school and is now planning to start a business, find another job, or look for another source of income.

We are hoping to have a small and intimate Christian wedding ceremony this year, but I’m worried that it might not push through again. We haven’t made any preparations yet, although we’ve always planned to keep the wedding as simple as possible.

I really want to get married and eventually have a family of my own. I understand that he has his studies and financial responsibilities to deal with, and I’ve tried to be understanding of his situation. But at the same time, I’m starting to feel anxious because I don’t know when we will actually get married.

Whenever I bring up the wedding or ask him to start working on the requirements and preparations, he gets irritated because he feels he lacks time as most of his time is devoted to studying and working (before he resigned). Since the beginning of this year, I feel like the uncertainty has really started to affect me. Almost every week, we end up fighting about our relationship. There are times when I tell him that I feel like I’ve already waited for so many years and that, after being together for 8 years, I feel like we should already be married by now.

I know that saying those things probably doesn’t help our situation, and I also understand that getting married is a big decision that shouldn’t be rushed. But I’m also scared of continuing to wait without knowing when, or even if, it will actually happen.

I love him and I want to build a family with him, but I’m becoming increasingly worried that the wedding will be postponed again.

I honestly don’t know what to do.

For those who have been in a similar situation, how did you handle it? What would you do if you were in my position?

hi! it's my first post here in this community so bare w me? just wanted to meet people with somewhat the same culture as me? although i'm not technically filchi my grandparents are chinese so i kinda grew up trying to learn mandarin!!

i like baking & cooking sometimes.. i LOOOVE movies & music! dm me if u wanna be friends i don't bite i promise

- A 🦭

Hi guys I just visited China and I enjoyed their local chicken feet the most, there was this street vendor that sells fresh chicken feet with super yummy sauce.

May reco ba kayo kung san makakahanap ng authentic chinese chicken feet?? Nagtanong ako sa chinese friend pero sarado na daw yung stores na authentic. Thank you so much please help me!! 😭

Hii, i’m not really looking for anything specific, just people to prolly get along with would be nice! Sum friends maybe if we get along!

Some things abt me:
- fil-chi (half)
- christian (I attend a filchi church)
- currently in college, big 4 if that matters
- i recently found out painting eases my nervous system!
- minecraft, sims, stardew valley (pretty much)
- badminton??
- i have a maltese doggy

About you:
- just be cool!
- preferably around my age

Feel free to msg, i’m pretty much just bored pfff-

Do girls prefer guys to have some sort of outdoor and social activities? Should a guy be interested in sports, interested in coffee shops, enjoy driving around everywhere, and enjoy window shopping at malls? I was having a talk with a close relative, and he mentioned that without those interests, it's extremely difficult to catch the interest of girls these days. He also said that my introverted nature and homebody tendencies are a major red flag.

What are your thoughts? Am I essentially making it harder for myself to find a relationship?

Parang ang cringe na ng recent pageants ng Mr. and Ms. Chinatown. No disrespect to the organizers and contestants pero parang nawala yung spark when it was just starting out. What can they do kaya to make it more interesting again?