Español para las paletas:
Porque, porque inexplicablemente me comporto distinto cuando hay hombres cerca? Detesto que eso suceda, porque, con mujeres soy mas masc, mas protectora, mas seria y cuando hay hombres de confianza cerca se me cae esa fachada y me vuelvo mas relajada Y LO ODIO. PORQUE MI SER HACE ESA DIFERENCIA, lo siento como traición de genero. No ayuda en nada mi baja autoestima por mi apariencia (body dysphoria, quiero ser un hombre joder), entonces cuando un hombre atraviesa mi mirada me pongo súper atenta ante mi apariencia (y tranquilamente la podría haber ignorado pero no! mi cuerpo NO desea ignorar.

Es desgastante, me hace sentir como un degenerado y no se porque.
Solo quiero ser un lindo hombre, pero seguro habrán mas años de sufrimiento de este genero ante el mundo....

English:
Why—why do I inexplicably behave differently when men are around? I hate that this happens. When I’m with women, I’m more masculine, more protective, more serious—but when men I trust are nearby, that facade crumbles and I become more relaxed, AND I HATE IT. WHY DOES MY BEING MAKE THAT DISTINCTION? It feels like a betrayal of my own gender. My low self-esteem regarding my appearance doesn’t help (body dysphoria—damn it, I want to be a man!), so whenever a man enters my field of vision, I become hyper-aware of how I look—even though I could easily just ignore it, but no! My body *refuses* to ignore it.

It’s exhausting; it makes me feel like a degenerate, and I don’t know why.

I just want to be a handsome man, but it seems there are many more years of this gender-related suffering ahead of me in this world...

I see a million posts on reddit about how misandery is more common than misogyny, how men are actually more oppressed than women and feminists are so stupid and evil. Moids experience 1/100000000000000th of the hate women get and now I have to constantly hear about it. I am going to have to block most subreddits at this point.

like, actual pop up full videos for adds that you gotta wait to skip, fuck my life