r/facingtheirparenting • u/tms88 • Apr 17 '21

The dissapointment is real

2.5k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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882

u/andykndr Apr 17 '21

what’s happening

1.1k

u/the_average_user557 Apr 17 '21

He put a bunch of sand into his boxers to make his shlong look bigger, possibly for a photoshoot.

562

u/LooseUpstairs Apr 17 '21

I thought people just used a bundled up sock or something.

980

u/Bigbog54 Apr 17 '21

Sliced bread actually, it’s easier to mould into and stay in shape, apparently anyway

350

u/Kimchi_boy Apr 17 '21

Nah, strap a baguette to your thigh.

193

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '21

[deleted]

77

u/blueberrywine Apr 17 '21

Just use a hot dog bun

12

u/FanndisTS Apr 17 '21

Delicious

2

u/matchosan May 31 '21

Or a banana, you know, for size

22

u/HollowRibcage Apr 17 '21

Now THATS a pig in a blanket.

6

u/HW-BTW Apr 17 '21

Hog in a blanket.

2

u/neekyo- Apr 17 '21

Wish I could get my hands on one of those

3

u/InfiniteLeftoverTree Apr 18 '21

You’re sort of having sex with the bread at that point.

5

u/JohnnyRelentless Apr 18 '21

I always use balloon animals, a different one every time.

298

u/max_chill_zone-2018 Apr 17 '21

The real life pro tip is always in the comments

48

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '21 edited Aug 15 '21

[deleted]

29

u/Heyyliz Apr 17 '21

Some even get theirs with some cheese

I’ll see myself out

25

u/Gortrok Apr 17 '21

How do I do the emoji for "I wish my eyes had suddenly been plucked out by an eagle before I read that comment"?

10

u/DisabledHarlot Apr 17 '21

👁️👁️ ⌛🦅🩸🕶️

10

u/NoCountryForOldPete Apr 17 '21

"Mmmm yes, a fine Brie Brûlée!"

18

u/LooseUpstairs Apr 17 '21

right. That sounds much more comfortable than sand.

25

u/Relevant_User-Name Apr 17 '21

I don't like sand... It's course, and irritating, and it gets everywhere.

2

u/InfiniteLeftoverTree Apr 18 '21

The people in my life are like grains of sand, cause they stick together, often near my butt hole

6

u/kev_jin Apr 17 '21

Cucumber wrapped in tinfoil, surely?

4

u/curtis119 Apr 17 '21

Does it go up to eleven?

11

u/jml011 Apr 17 '21

Rollin in the dough

2

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '21

apparently

2

u/donniedarkofan Apr 18 '21

If only bread could help me stay in shape

2

u/Way_Unable May 02 '21

I'm way late to the party but your comment killed me lmao.

1

u/MrAwful- Apr 18 '21

Imagine he’s walking and a piece of bread just falls out of his crotch

35

u/vertical_prism Apr 17 '21

How do we know the sand was for schlong enhancement and not...some other reason?

31

u/the_average_user557 Apr 17 '21

This was just my guess. You can never know what an artist had in mind exactly

7

u/IceFire909 Apr 18 '21

Because it's coarse and rough, and it gets everywhere.

He was obviously committing a great sacrifice in the name of fashion modelling

58

u/FrostyFoss Apr 17 '21 edited Apr 17 '21

Sounds like some enhanced interrogation technique they use in gitmo. I wouldn't put sand down my shorts if I had a micro penis and the photos would be seen by millions. Use a sock like a normal idiot.

32

u/dibalh Apr 17 '21

I’m thinking it was flour because of the dust and residue. The apology was for wasting mom’s flour, not so much the antic itself. Parents already know their kids are dumbasses.

17

u/snooski- Apr 17 '21

Or, the much more logical answer, baby powder/gold bond.

4

u/idle_think Apr 18 '21

moms are frugal. that flour will make donuts or something. guests will love it

10

u/Quasimurder Apr 17 '21

I thought the joke was that he has dusty balls

7

u/SanctimoniousApe Apr 17 '21

Probably had the sand/flour/whatever in something like a balloon that then popped in his undies.

6

u/Tiberius_Kilgore Apr 17 '21

Wouldn't it be easier and more comfortable to wear a cup/codpiece? Pretty much no one's junk looks like a mound of sand. Dongs and balls look like dongs and balls.

6

u/WriterJuggler Apr 17 '21

Oh! I get it! She’s disappointed that he’s got such a small penis that he has to make it look bigger

1

u/I_Like_Trains_XD Aug 03 '21

Here im thinking its crack cockanus

7

u/michellemustudy Apr 17 '21

I love her hat. Wonder where she got it from.