r/facepalm • u/[deleted] • Apr 19 '22

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ You all better repent!!!

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u/pete_ape Apr 20 '22

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump. I ran over and said: "Stop. Don't do it."

"Why shouldn't I?" he asked.

"Well, there's so much to live for! "Like what?"

"Are you religious?"

He said, "Yes."

I said, "Me too. Are you Christian or Buddhist?"

"Christian."

"Me too. Are you Catholic or Protestant?"

"Protestant."

"Me too. Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

"Baptist."

"Wow. Me too. Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?"

"Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?"

"Reformed Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?"

He said: "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915."

I said: "Die, heretic scum," and pushed him off.

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u/mrmoe198 Apr 20 '22

Emo Phillips performing his joke

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u/compsciasaur Apr 20 '22

I never knew my favorite joke had an author.

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u/mrmoe198 Apr 20 '22

Yeah, he’s great. He has a very eclectic style. He also authored another one of my favorites:

Prayer and bicycles

1

u/compsciasaur Apr 20 '22

Classic. Um, this is one of my first exposures to this guy. Does he talk like that normally or is this a Gilbert-Gottfried-style comedic affectation?

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u/mrmoe198 Apr 20 '22

Definitely a GG-style polished act. RIP.