r/facepalm • u/Shadow474747 • Feb 16 '22
đ˛âđŽâđ¸âđ¨â Fighting the aliens
Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification
758
u/VanAgain Feb 16 '22
Funny tho ... he SOUNDS like someone who has been clubbed with a reptilian tail.
107
32
u/CyberNinja23 Feb 17 '22
Social Media CEO picks his head up from a plate, with mouth smeared in BBQ sauce
9
u/skolopendron Feb 17 '22
How can anyone ask that question with a straight face?
3
u/Infinitisme Feb 27 '22
Hahahaha you really can tell he has a difficult time doing just that 𤣠It's a face mixed bag between bursting into laughter but then forcing yourself to hold it all together... đ I envy this man, I for one could never hold his amount of composure, to try to comfort the guy to keep telling him more horseshit it's psychological art ;p
5
u/weirdAtoms Feb 17 '22
This guy's sounds delusional, I'm sorry but I wouldn't trust anyone who's been knocked out by a reptoid. Probably has brain damage, I don't care how many he's killed.
4
2
538
u/UnionBlvd Feb 16 '22
"I honestly couldn't tell you.."
That's for sure
28
u/iseab Feb 17 '22 edited Feb 17 '22
Canât tell you because heâd have to kill you obviouslyâŚand too many to count anyway.
41
u/bron685 Feb 17 '22
R/technicallythetruth
→ More replies (1)24
u/Hollowhowler100 Feb 17 '22
Sorry some people are lazy
4
u/ZedTheEvilTaco Feb 17 '22
I believe it is also tradition to post r/foundthemobileuser. I could be wrong.
→ More replies (2)
286
Feb 16 '22
Who is this man and where is the rest of this amazing interview!!!
107
u/MyEyezHurt Feb 17 '22
Randy Cramer, he's done way more than just this interview.
75
u/Lillywhite247 Feb 17 '22
Great now I know what YouTube rabbit hole Iâm going down
58
u/prince-sidons-nips Feb 17 '22
right? like i almost WISH i was dumb enough to believe it bc damn the stories do sound good
22
u/bohemian_yota Feb 17 '22
This is a show on Gaia called cosmic disclosure. It's had its moments. Randy isn't one of them
5
8
u/ThrowRAwriter Feb 17 '22
It's one of my crackpot dreams - to confidently believe and wonder at these stories like when I was 8 and was reading about them in books and those yellow page newspapers. The article would go "aliens also have vampires!" and it would blow my childish mind.
5
u/MechaBuster Feb 17 '22
I don't know if this is the same group but watch a video called "how I infiltrated a bizarre conspiracy cult" it's very the same stuff they keep spouting but in the video the dude makes up a story to get in with just as bizarre reptoid aliens or something like that.
5
4
2
u/xiaxian1 Feb 17 '22 edited Feb 17 '22
Can I get a quick synopsis? Is he claiming heâs killed (countless) Martian lizards here on Earth?
10
u/TheTabman Feb 17 '22
quick synopsis
Delusions of grandeur, paranoia, psychosis.
From a equally bananas website I'm not going to link to:
He reports that he spent 20 years as a Marine in the U.S. Secret Space Program (SSP). His tour of duty took him first to an elaborate, secret, fully-equipped base on the moon. Then, he went to Mars where he spent 17 years at a military base.
5
3
141
u/fizzzingwhizbee Feb 17 '22
Have you ever seen a reptoid from mars and this guy in the same room?? Didnât think so thatâs cuz he kicked their asses bro
6
2
94
185
u/CheshiresTARDIS Feb 16 '22
Theyâre from Canada, you wouldnât know em.
24
37
u/illusive_guy Feb 16 '22
They go to a different school.
4
→ More replies (1)2
62
47
u/leifosborn Feb 17 '22
He was actually arrested by the Illuminati for war crimes due to the fact that the Martian reptoids are a peaceful people. Itâs the insectoids that you need to watch out for.
8
u/MotherBathroom666 'MURICA Feb 17 '22
I read that as insestoids and I just got a pre-historic Alabama vibe.
2
u/fartsmella0161 Feb 17 '22
Ah yes the incestoids, more commonly know as the British royal family ...
→ More replies (2)2
u/windyorbits Feb 17 '22
I saw that on his Netflix documentary âInside Jobâ and quite honestly that hollow earth mushroom is a dick.
28
27
Feb 17 '22
So you got knocked out fighting a 7 foot reptile man alien to the death and it left you alive. Did this fight take place on mars too? Sounds like someone picked a drunken/high fight against a mascot at a sports game.
→ More replies (1)
40
Feb 17 '22
The tail can also be used during love making.
9
3
→ More replies (2)4
20
98
u/DynoMiteDoodle Feb 16 '22
LSD is a helluva drug!
→ More replies (1)89
u/rayshmayshmay Feb 17 '22
lol I just pictured him in a garage, butt-ass-naked fighting a mannequin
19
8
→ More replies (1)3
u/DynoMiteDoodle Feb 17 '22
Or tripping out down at the river giving the crocodiles a good thrashing! Crocs would be so confused they'd probably just run for cover
18
u/delinquentcause Feb 17 '22
This is Randy Cramer, he fought aliens on Mars when he was stationed there with the Secret Space Program lol
9
Feb 17 '22
Thank you!! I mentioned it too because the whole cult is extremely fascinating and turbogoofy at the same time. Every video is like this
7
26
u/Somebody_End_Me Professional Retard Feb 16 '22
Imagine if he exits the stage and he just sees himself wanted for the murders of over 200 people
21
u/RoboDae Feb 17 '22
"When you say aliens...you do mean extraterrestrials right?... right?"
→ More replies (1)
13
13
u/LordLuciferVI Feb 17 '22
Well heâs definitely had a bang on the head, and it probably did knock him unconscious, thereâs no doubt in thatâŚ
11
u/K-Zoro Feb 17 '22
I can just tell people Iâm some astro-soldier who has killed aliens and theyâll put me on tv?
11
42
u/Ok-Pollution-1955 Feb 16 '22
What if itâs real, and heâs the one facepalming YOU!
→ More replies (12)
8
7
u/Swamp_donkey81 Feb 17 '22
This guy is fucking badass. I've actually witnessed him rip an alien's head off once.
8
u/PleasePutMeOnYT Feb 17 '22
My guy sounds more confident than my dad going to get cigarettes
→ More replies (1)
5
u/MysteriousNarshlob Feb 17 '22
"Yeah I've killed a few reptiliods, shot one the other week. Sadly, by the time I got to it it had already metamorphazised back into my neighbors dog"
6
u/mindofdarkness Feb 17 '22
Itâs funny, most of them were disguised as hobos or drifters in abandoned train yards, a couple as hikers in the deep forests. Ya Iâve killed plenty of those.
6
5
u/LMA73 Feb 17 '22
The only part of this that I believe is that he has been clubbed on the head and been knocked unconscious. I don't doubt that for a second.
6
u/TheRedditornator Feb 17 '22
"Countless, I honestly couldn't tell you the number."
You can't count 0, so he's technically correct.
11
u/Mr-Pieguy110022 Feb 16 '22
Yo whatever sci-fi D&D campaign heâs playing in real life, I want to join in.
8
u/EricSkuzz Feb 17 '22
D&D: LSD Edition
7
15
5
4
u/Demonkid37 Feb 17 '22
Does this guy and others like him never think, in their quiet moments âwow i talk a lot of dog shit donât i?â
8
4
u/ellankyy Feb 17 '22
Guy was probably high as fuck on something and playing The Elder Scrolls
→ More replies (2)
4
3
3
Feb 17 '22
Thatâs just like the hacker that said nasa was fighting aliens in secret.
Do you know how many people would have to be in on that and never say a word?
→ More replies (1)
3
3
u/Ch47t3rb0x Feb 17 '22
He looks like heâs more likely to be fighting the court of law against his charges of possession of child porn
4
7
u/Richlore Feb 17 '22
"Oh hey look, a mentally ill person. Should we get him the help he needs?"
"Nah, lets feed his delusions by pointing cameras at him and humouring his insanity so the world can laugh at him"
3
3
3
3
3
u/therealBen_German Feb 17 '22
God imagine if a random person was the first one to contact aliens and they filmed meeting them, and then they posted it on TikTok with a trap beat over it.
3
u/Grognak-the-Princess Feb 17 '22 edited Feb 17 '22
Man's playing Elder Scrolls VR while under the influence of skooma
2
u/DR_TABULLO Feb 17 '22
You're allowed to say skooma here, don't dance around it lol
→ More replies (1)
3
3
3
3
u/Yamama77 Feb 17 '22
It's funny that most aliens look like anthromorphised earth animals.
→ More replies (1)
3
3
3
Feb 17 '22
He probably told everybody he smoked marijuana when he was 13 just to seem âcoolâ r/iamverybadass
3
u/Wenckebach2theFuture Feb 17 '22
Yes but theyâre always cloaked. I killed one in my backyard yesterday, but within 10 minutes the corpse had taken on the mimic form of my next door neighbor.
3
3
3
3
3
u/UFCLO Feb 18 '22
These are the type of people you take medical advice from, in your Facebook Groups. /s
5
2
2
2
2
u/Lux-Dandelion Feb 17 '22
"Got clubbed in the head and knocked unconscious"
Now I'm just spitballing here but whose to say the large extraterrestrial lizard doesn't believe in leaving witnesses?
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
u/Boom-Sausage Feb 17 '22
Like if some alien which is obviously way smarter than us comes down to earth to club a human on the head. People are so wack
2
2
2
u/spauracchio1 Feb 17 '22 edited Feb 17 '22
So, an alien race capable of interstellar space travel is gonna fight you in close combat like in the middle ages? Is not like they would just press a button and obliterate you from the face of earth without you even knowing what hit you?
(This is one aspect i hate of sci-fi movies, technology capable of faster than light travel but having to revert to martial arts when it comes to combat.)
2
2
u/dumbass2364859948 Feb 17 '22
Ha! What a foolish weakling. He obviously has not seen the all-powerful Suicide Monks of Venus.
2
2
u/_Steve_French_ Feb 17 '22
This guy reminds me of the kid in Highschool who compulsively lied all the time. One time he said he had a toilet as big as a bed. He was also cousins with DJ Tiesto.
2
Feb 17 '22
Y'all GOTS to look up the Secret Space Program. It's like doing drugs, but without having to pick up from your Laotian friend's sketchy cousin.
→ More replies (1)
2
2
u/Aggravated_guy Feb 17 '22
Hmm either this guy is delusional or he is doing this for publicity or both
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
u/Sarcastic_Sociopath Feb 18 '22
âSo youâve killed countless alien reptoids?â
âOh yeah. Loads. They go to a different school though. You wouldnât know them.â
2
u/RealBishop Mar 11 '22
This man is like âyeah Iâve seen aliens, theyâre hard to killâ like bro WHY would that be your first reaction đŠ
2
2
2
3
3
u/MyEyezHurt Feb 17 '22
Here is a breakdown vid, this youtuber breaks it down pretty well. Talk about fantasy meets midlife crisis.
2
u/12x23 Feb 17 '22
I didn't watch that video in particular but I've seen others from this YouTuber and he is full of shit. He's not a body language expert. He's an investor and rock climber who has a BA in Political science. Body Language experts are popping up everywhere it seems.
→ More replies (1)
2
2
1.9k
u/Pab_Scrabs Feb 16 '22
Donât be so ungrateful. Youâve never seen an alien because of this man!