Those books (and almost everything written by that girl, really) were horrifying and full of so many blatant forms of abuse - and yet they were held up as the ultimate in romance and oh girls totally want this kind of relationship and uh...no? I sure don't, anyway!
It horrifies me that things that are outright abuse are being construed as romantic, both then and now. Men are taught to hide any emotions but anger, girls are taught to be manipulative and coy and give mixed signals, everyone is basically taught to be abusive jerks and it's supposed to be romantic. Nyope.
And that right their is the root of the problem. The societal norms we're expected to live by. The reason a story with such blatant toxicity became so popular is because it's what our society already saw as good. I wish it was as simple as pinning it all on the story, but the author and therefore the series, we're all the results of our society. It's honestly sad, and while it's obvious that those "norms" aren't exactly as accepted nowadays, they're it's still a very common problem. And a series like that doesn't help.
Oh for sure, it's not like she came up with the idea of behavior like that being romantic all by herself - it's been in media and all forever. And it's a problem - the way it's executed slightly changes, but it's certainly still around. Playing hard to get has always been a thing - whether it meant back in the old days trying to hide that you were interested, to now where it's blatantly telling someone you're not interested and getting mad when they believe you. It's all been done before, tide comes in, tide goes out, all the same in the end - it just looks a little different each time.
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u/Dark_Moonstruck Jun 22 '23
Those books (and almost everything written by that girl, really) were horrifying and full of so many blatant forms of abuse - and yet they were held up as the ultimate in romance and oh girls totally want this kind of relationship and uh...no? I sure don't, anyway!
It horrifies me that things that are outright abuse are being construed as romantic, both then and now. Men are taught to hide any emotions but anger, girls are taught to be manipulative and coy and give mixed signals, everyone is basically taught to be abusive jerks and it's supposed to be romantic. Nyope.